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Is he BU for acting this way?

6 replies

newnameish · 21/03/2024 17:46

Someone I know through my local community centre/group and see quite regularly asked me to go on a date (out of the blue). I politely and respectfully turned down the offer. He seemed OK and said he hopes our interactions will not change. I assured him things will be the same. However, he has changed towards me. I bumped into him today, as normal, I greeted him, he said hello (with no eye contact) and then turned his head the other way. I was going to stop by and have a chat as we normally do, but, I just kind of continued walking.

A similar incident happened yesterday, when I walked into the room, he pretended he didn't see me, again thankfully I was talking to someone so it wasn't too awkward for me to be blanked.

I don't think he had strong feelings for me as we've only started talking about 6 weeks ago. I've given him no indication that I'm romantically interested in him. I feel quite upset because we got on so well and was hoping we can be friends.

I feel he's been unreasonable and I don't know how I should proceed? Not interested in playing games and at the same time, I don't want to be ignored.

OP posts:
Dacadactyl · 21/03/2024 17:58

Maybe he's still a bit embarrassed. I don't think he's BU really. He might feel a bit awkward initially but then warm back up over the coming weeks.

Mrsttcno1 · 21/03/2024 18:01

Aw he’s not being unreasonable, he’s probably just a bit embarrassed at being turned down and feels a bit awkward about it, I know I would be feeling that way if I was him!

newnameish · 21/03/2024 18:06

Dacadactyl · 21/03/2024 17:58

Maybe he's still a bit embarrassed. I don't think he's BU really. He might feel a bit awkward initially but then warm back up over the coming weeks.

Thank you. This is reassuring. I'm going on holiday for 2 weeks. Hoping when I come back, things will be back to normal. 🙏

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citrinetrilogy · 21/03/2024 18:11

He might have had to pluck up a lot of courage to ask you, so he's probably embarrassed.

UnravellingTheWorld · 21/03/2024 19:23

This happened to me several years ago - I was asked out and when I declined he stopped being friendly.

Honestly it validated my decision because it showed me what kind of man he was. Yes it sucked to lose a friend, but that was his choice.

newnameish · 21/03/2024 19:36

UnravellingTheWorld · 21/03/2024 19:23

This happened to me several years ago - I was asked out and when I declined he stopped being friendly.

Honestly it validated my decision because it showed me what kind of man he was. Yes it sucked to lose a friend, but that was his choice.

This is my thought. As other posters have suggested, he could be embarrassed which is fine but he's a grown adult. It's not his first time asking someone on a date. He should've factored the possibility of me declining based on how romantically incompatible we are.

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