How to decide on maternity leave length?

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I’m trying to decide how long to have off on maternity leave but I have no idea or concept of how long I will want.

I will do my best to EBF and want to do this to a year if I can. Never mind if not but that is the goal at this point in time.

I used to think 9 months off work was enough but I look at my 13 month old nephew and just think how young he is. He doesn’t go to nursery at all but I can’t imagine, having worked in nurseries before, sending my own very small child for very long days.

DH’s wage pays for our house, bills, cars, food etc but that is it, nothing more left for disposable income or saving.

My 2k net is all for saving/disposable etc, I’ll possibly need £400 or so of it to cover cost of living increases (thanks rates!)

So currently we have 1.5k/1.6k left to either save, go out with, buy birthday presents with, put towards holidays, clothes, and so on.

Throw a baby into the mix. I’m sure all of you will know better than me how much extra that will cost us per month, with the classes or grabbing a coffee on leave or whatever.

My work’s maternity package is 10 weeks at 90%, 20 weeks at 1/2 pay + SMP, 9 weeks at SMP and 13 weeks unpaid.

Is it easier to say you want longer off and then reduce if need be? If your DH’s income covered all the essentials would you advise taking a year and just cutting back?

They need to assume you are taking a year off and then you give 8 weeks notice if you want to return earlier than that. There's no need to make a decision about it right now

Obviously there is no right answer, it's what is best for you, your child and your family.

My daughter went in shortly after her first birthday. This was just right for us. She was getting increasingly mobile and so it was getting harder and harder to keep her entertained and out of every cupboard she could find. I was starting to struggle mentally with the relentless cycle of housework and naps, feeding and making food and cleaning up and repeating over and over again. I was also running out of money post-SMP ending. She's been in for 8 months now and she loves it. Gets lots of stimulation, socialisation, physical exercise, and learns loads. I wouldn't have wanted to do a year and would definitely find her too full on full time now but she's an extremely energetic toddler with a very short attention span!

She was also down to only a morning and evening feed at 1 year which quickly tapered off to none by 14 months. She just lost interest, and I was ready to stop too.

Sorry, I wouldn't have wanted to do MORE than a year is what I meant.

If I was you (which I sort of am, I’m due in a few weeks!) I would say tell work the max amount of time you think you might want, and then before you go off check how much notice you have to give.

For my work, I have to give 28 days notice if I want to go back sooner so no issue at all really! I’m planning on taking the full year, we have saved a good amount to cover us for the full year so we have that there as a buffer if needed but I just thought I’d much rather tell them a year and then if I’m desperate to go back earlier I can do that! X

Have a look at your policies to see if your work pays keeping in touch days (up to 10) and also when your annual leave rolls over. Your not allowed to take annual leave on mat leave (including bank holidays). I technically returned to work after 9.5 months (did shared parental leave) with both DS's. Due to holiday roll over and keeping some aside I physically went back to work only a few weeks before their birthdays but was getting paid!

Should say my wage is a lot more then my DHs hence him doing the unpaid bit of leave. But I put in for the full mat leave then did shared parental forms after babies were here.

Ours went just before their first birthday. It was a good time for us, they’re nearly 3 now and have loved nursery pretty much from the beginning, we have never had a tantrum or tears. We both took leave and possibly could have taken longer, but glad we didn’t financially. We have a cleaner and our downtime is 100% ours to do what we want with. We’re always out at weekends, often have a late lunch out so nobody needs to cook. Neither of us feel stressed. We go on amazing holidays, and feel we have proper quality together.