Child vomiting and I’ve got a huge meeting tomorrow

[MammothyGoodness]

So my youngest has started vomiting. It’s like the exorcist, walls, carpet, bed etc. not the best news but normally I can manage. Except tomorrow I’ve got a huge meeting, massive. I’m Meeting some potential investors, taking them on a tour of our offices, showing them how our product works and then presenting in the afternoon. Others could probably do some of it, but I’m the point of contact, I’ve worked my ass off on this for months, and now I’m stuck. School won’t take her if she’s thrown up. I don’t want to send her in if she’s sick. I’m a single parent. Family are away, I’ve literally got no one who can help me. I can’t leave her, which means I can’t go in. So now my meeting is ruined and I could just cry

Can you join the meeting remotely? Have a laptop in the meeting so you can do your best via Zoom?
But be clear it could be for the meeting only as child is the priority.

I had the same last week and missed out on a lot at work - I was stressed that whole day with a sick child. But I have already forgotten that day and nobody at work fell apart without me. They are much more important hope they’re better soon!

I would.

Reality is even if you sent her in you'd have the school calling before first break, plus you'd have the added stress of sending your sick kid in, the possibility of other kids and teachers getting ill, and the fact you'd still miss your presentation while constantly waiting/stressing for the phone to ring all morning.

Get onto who you can now and plan what you can.

I would judge you very harshly if you sent your child in. My eldest has type 1 diabetes and a stomach bug can be a very serious event. As inconvenient as it is the 48 hour rule is there for a reason. My daughter is a grown up now but the anxiety of those early years was massive. For those PPs who think the rule doesn't count, please be careful because you don't know what harm you can do for the sake of a day or two.

No. They're contagious for 48 hours (at least) from last symptoms. It's spread by contact.

If your DD has finished vomiting could she come with you to work and sit with iPad and headphones in a corner? Depending on how old she is? Then you leave as soon as you can?

Well she won't be the first parent that sends her in like that. I did curse parent when I caught a vomiting bug from dc just before Christmas though!

I think it shows a gap at work if they're only relying on you and noone has the knowledge to replace you.
I'd let them know I can't make it but would be happy to talk to the investors over the phone or on zoom, and in the future help put a plan in place so someone can take over when necessary.

Can you email the investors now explaining the situation and see if they can rearrange?

Failing that I would call first things say you can't be there because your child is sick. But colleagues will be meeting them, and as others have suggested I would join remotely where possible.

Sorry, I know it's a shit situation. But it's not fair on anyone if she goes to school feeling sick herself and then spreads a bug.

Yeah zoom. You can't send her in.

Well you’ll have to suck it up. The reality of being a parent, they always bloody get ill at the worst possible time. If you work for a company it’s their problem not yours. If you’re self employed then you’ll just have to explain and re arrange. Obviously you can’t send a child who’s been vomiting the day before to school.

How old are they?

Work is clearly very important to you but your child should come first without a second thought. My school friend complained to her mum about a headache over a weekend but her mum and step dad had booked a weekend break. They ended up leaving my friend with her grandad for the weekend. The headache persisted and she ended up dying from a brain tumour that nobody even knew about. Her mums biggest regret has been reiterated over and over. You can't get those last moments back

Can you ask a friend to look after her? I'd take a day off for a good friend if it was a very big deal for her job (I hope I would anyway!).

Or bring her in - I've done it in the past, for a one hour meeting, left him in my office with a colleague, though he'd stopped vomiting by then. I did feel very guilty asking one of the team to be a childminder for a bit, but needs must sometimes, and she was a lovely woman and very supportive of me as a single parent.

Can you tell work you have the vomiting bug as well as your child- I know you shouldn't have to, but some workplaces are not that understanding of parents.

Can you pay an emergency babysitter?

Yes. This.

And people wonder why there is a shortage of childcare???

yea just call a random childminder who will be free tomorrow to come and look after your child they’ve never met, whilst the child is spewing up and feeling dreadful - maybe it’ll escalate and the poor childminder will have to go to a&e with said vomit covered child.

OR

send child into school to potentially vomit over teachers/classmates and have someone clean that all up. Then spread to classmates and teacher.

The timing is crap but you need to reschedule the meeting.

Oh I really feel for you my luv. I’ve had this situation so many times, and I’ve lost clients (and therefore money), when I’ve had to
cancel work very last minute.

I’ve literally had no one to help me in these situations and it’s so tough. I think it’s good a idea not to send little one in, as tempting as it may be. As your little one may have become ill as some else didn’t keep their little one off -
it’s a vicious cycle with these bugs.

It sounds like you’ll still be able to make something work with the help of colleagues, although it won’t be the same. I’m sure you’re frantically looking for someone to help with your DC and I hope it works out for you. I’ve everything crossed.

Well done by the way for all your hard work!

Oh ffs. Who would think a kid having a headache would die from a brain tumour? Unfortunate but if every parent cancelled everything every time a kid had a headache or a tummy bug we would never get out.

That mum should feel absolutely no guilt for not cancelling a weekend over a headache.

Absolute tragedy but nothing she could EVER have predicted.

In fact I've had CBT therapy over health obsessions and if I told my therapist my kid had a headache and I was going to cancel a trip because of it, she would have told me off and gone through the therapy steps to convince me to go!

You think it's ok to send a sick child to school?
Even if someone was selfish enough to knowingly pass on a sickness bug to other children in the class meaning their parents would have to take time of school and the staff meaning the school has to pay for supply. Do you think it's fair to send a child to school who is obviously unwell? It's not the role of a school to care for sick children who should be at home. If you have children you have to put them first no matter how inconvenient that may be.
OP I'm very sorry this has happened. Can the meeting be rescheduled? Could the work you have done still be used either by someone else who can take the meeting or you at a later date.
I hope your child is better soon and that you don't come down with something that sounds horrible

They always manage to do this!

I've always thought the 48 rule was nonsense. Aren't tummy bugs most contagious right before the d&v starts? If she has stopped being sick and send her in who is to know anyway?

Th TA and the caretakers scrubbing up sick and trying to call parents and kids always tell you if they’ve been I’ll the day before - then there’s the clearing the classroom which interrupts learning.

Go through your contacts and find a parent willing to help out - where’s her father? Could he give up a days work?

Childminders have the same rules as schools and nurseries. If they're sick, they can't go in.

I’d try a nanny agency - there maybe one in your area. Or one of those babysitting sites.

Theyll be trained and insured and vetted.

Get someone else to do the tour etc and then zoom with the clients for your presentation and any questions etc.. I so feel your pain, my toddler had constant V&D for ten days and it was so stressful looking after him and worrying about work at the same time. I managed to work from home and do meetings etc while he napped but it was brutal. If it happened again I would just take some emergency leave as it wasn't worth the stress.

I used to be a childminder , have took on a child who had broken bone , not fit for school , never with a vomiting bug.

I don’t know a single childminder who would also do that and risk catching it themselves with 48 hours with no pay .

It’s a blooody hard situation. I do feel for you Op