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"Everyone" likes this man who makes me uncomfortable

2 replies

Platedshoes · 14/03/2024 13:59

Which is fair enough, people will have their opinions, but this one is chair of a club coaching adults' sport and director of an organisation organising children's sport.

He's an attractive man. I think that makes a difference to the way people, especially women, respond to him. Things I see as sexual harassment, other women see as compliments and he gets away with things they'd think were creepy from someone else..E.g. he remarked on the length and tightness of a young woman's shorts recently, "joking" about what they do for him.

The woman in question was there and seemed to enjoy it (although could have been laughing it off) another woman made a point of saying how funny he was and the men all laughed along. It was just me who asked if that was really appropriate, especially from a man in his position, and apparently I have no sense of humour and I'm just jealous because I don't look so good in the shorts (this from men and women).

Anyway, so I've made some attempt to call it out when I hear it, but nothing will change. What else should I do, or is it true I'm making too much if it? This isn't an isolated event, just one example of many similar ones

It seems universally, others think he's a great guy, doing a great job on both these projects.

OP posts:
mindutopia · 14/03/2024 14:02

Honestly, I'd report it to the organisation if you feel it's a concern (which it sounds like it is as constitutes sexual harassment).

Unfortunately, I think a lot of women have a conditioned response to laugh along with these things as a survival mechanism, and even if they do make them feel uncomfortable, they'll smile and say it wasn't a big deal, even when someone else points it out. Such is the nature of misogyny.

VenusClapTrap · 14/03/2024 14:03

Keep on calling him out. It may not appear to make a difference at the time, but it may give others confidence not to laugh along next time. And it might just make him think twice in future.

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