Sons attitude and behaviour - don’t know what to do next

[Angelmonkey]

My son is 12 and in year 8. Recently his attitude and behaviour has gone downhill and it’s becoming increasingly difficult to speak to him. What I can’t work out is if it is normal teenage attitude or something more.
He answers back to everything, quite often in a sarcastic or defensive tone, has no respect for parents, sibling or belongings. He doesn’t accept or seem to understand consequences, lies about what he has eaten- taking snacks and hiding the wrappers in his bedroom. He will make silly noises constantly, but cannot tolerate his sister doing similar - he will shout and lash out if she does this.
Generally he behaves at school - there was an incident earlier in the year when a friend was irritating him by making noises but thankfully there has been nothing since.
He eats a good diet, screen time is limited but the behaviour seems to be deteriorating.
If you’ve got to the end of this - any tips or advice would be greatly appreciated

This is just so incredibly normal. He will grow out of it by year 12. Try and find it funny, we were all idiotic teenagers once.

Keen to see responses... my nearly 13 Yr old has just started becoming very rude and mood swingy. I am assuming hormones. Agh.

https://www.google.com/search?q=kevin+becomes+a+teenager&oq=kevin+becomes+a+teenager&gs_lcrp=EgZjaHJvbWUyBggAEEUYOdIBCTEyMDM0ajBqN6gCALACAA&sourceid=chrome&ie=UTF-8#fpstate=ive&vld=cid:aa6d8525,vid:dLuEY6jN6gY,st:0

This does sound like normal teenage behaviour but when you say 'lash out' do you mean hitting because that needs addressing.

This is my 12 Yr old too.

My older 2 boys went through the same.
Though admittedly he is much worse 😂

Take him for a long walk and talk to him
Well no listen to him let him talk

See what he says

Sounds incredibly similar to my ds at that age. He's slowly coming out of it at 15.

He tends to shout and storm off now, we try and intervene beforehand so he doesn’t have chance to get physical. If he does hit then he does get a consequence. Unfortunately he doesn’t seem to connect him hitting with getting told off and having screen time removed (or any other consequence we put in place)

Try and talk to him at a time where he's calm and relaxed. Listen to what he says and reflect it back to him to ensure you've understood what he means. Ask him about school, clubs, and online life to see if there's something bothering him. It is probably just teenage hormones and him growing up, but there's always the possibility that it's something else and you need him to know that you've got his back if there's a problem.