Organised a social event gone wrong

[greateasternboatway]

Just need a handhold or to get it out and stop ruminating. Tonight I organised a social event for a hobby group of mine and it went quite wrong due to issues with the venue (legitimate issues but not something I could do anything about at the time).

No one is really willing to take on the organisation of these events which feels like an extra kick in the teeth. I do enjoy doing them but to have fun, not to get yelled at.

is this just a case of no good deed goes unpunished?

Oh dear, sorry about your event. I'm sure you did your best and didn't deserve to be yelled at.

Who yelled at you?

I hate this feeling. Well done you for organising, at least you know you've done your bit for a while.

Thanks all. It’s just embarrassing and I felt really overwhelmed as all of the feedback came right at the end of the (I thought successful) event.

@WhateverMate some of the attendees as they had issues with the bar staff (which apparently is well known for this place but nothing on Google or Tripadvisor etc).

I feel for you. I had to arrange our work Christmas do one year and it was a disaster!

Oh that sucks! And whoever yelled is a dickhead

i organised a staff Xmas do one year which was HORRIFIC. Worst food, worst service, it really was so bad. I booked it when it had a good rep and the place changed hands just before we went

i I swear to god it looked like someone had vomited on my fish

we jusyvgot hammered and enjoyed it Anyhows! (The night not the fish)

If an event is unsuccessful due to service etc it's unfortunate but I wouldn't blame the organisers . I can decide whether to attend something and take responsibility for my actions.

Who yelled? Are they friends or colleagues? I wouldn't be impressed by them at all. I'm

Tell the yeller that the next event is being organised by them!

@DilemmaDelilah omg please do share!

Thanks all. It’s a hobby group so they are friends but not close ones. We’re all in our 30s/40s!

Apparently it had been discussed before the event but no one thought to tell me their concerns in the 4 weeks prior to it when I announced where we were going!

@greateasternboatway it was a long time ago now, thank goodness! I had put a lot of effort into it - choosing a bistro at a hotel I had been to before and liked. We were promised a great ambience, good food, and a disco afterwards to get everyone going. What actually happened was that they had shut the bistro for a refit and we were shoved into a large and echoey 'function room' with white walls and fluorescent lighting and a chap in a corner with some disco equipment. Just us.... food was non descript, no gravy until I asked for it, no cranberry sauce, no ambience. I don't think anyone stayed for the 'disco'. I certainly didn't!

What went wrong with yours?

I organise various events for various groups because I enjoy doing it but I'm always very clear that whilst helpful input is welcome criticism will not be tolerated unless they are prepared to organise the next event. I would be especially furious that there were concerns beforehand but no-one mentioned it. And I certainly wouldn't put up with being shouted at!

Yelling at someone who has gone to the trouble of organising an event is so rude, especially for circumstances beyond your control. I am always very grateful to people who arrange anything!

I used to be the organiser for a hobby group and it didn't matter where we went there was always complaints from somebody, usually over petty things.
I changed the restaurant or venue every time, and then there would be someone saying they wouldn't go if it was held there because last time they went a waiter looked at them funny, but if I asked them to suggest somewhere better...silence.

Eventually a woman joined the group whose family managed a venue so she was happy to take over and we started going there each time. People still complained and yet still wouldn't offer alternatives or volunteer themselves to organise anything.

Basically, you definitely can't please all the people all of the time.

The person/ people who complained have volunteered to organise next event

@DilemmaDelilah Oh god, you poor thing! That sounds awful. Ours was mainly issues with staff, thankfully the food/drink was all OK (pretty standard set menu fare). I too wasn’t overly happy with some of the service we received but I did my best to get on with the night.

I know people say it doesn’t reflect on the organiser, but in the moment the eventgoers were upset/embarrased/angry and they came to me, and it was extremely embarrassing to hear this after I thought the event had gone well and had even enjoyed myself (organisers will know this can be hard sometimes!). It’s taken all pleasure out of it for me and even mixing with these people as there were some really nasty comments made (like ‘we doubted you’d be able to pull this off’) even those trying to put it nicely had absolutely no consideration for me or my feelings.

I’m listening to those who have expressed their views kindly after the event and ignoring the yellers! I’m angrier now but there’s nothing to do other than email the venue then move on.

I’ll be giving the group a wide berth from now on! It’s a shame as I really do like the hobby but can’t be doing with the schoolground politics anymore.

That's awful for you. I'm so sorry

slow clap 🙄