How to tell DD she's going for an assessment

[Oliviacoleman]

DD (6.5) will be going for an assessment with an Ed psychologist in about 6 weeks time.

Just to give you a bit of background, she's doing well at school at the moment, just not working at her ability and never finishes her work so school have mentioned that a few times. Very capable but slightly distracted and slow.

Not sure how to tell her she's going to be seen by someone? I don't want her to feel like something isn't right.

I'd not make a big thing of it.
just say we're going to have a chat with someone about how you're getting on at school. Make it sound as if it is something quite routine and ordinary.

I think that the school are viewing your DD’s needs with slightly more concern than you may be thinking. As a SENCo, we would only employ the services of an EP if we had significant concerns about a child - at the moment EP assessments are as rare as hens teeth! I’m assuming the EP will be seeing her in school rather than her being taken somewhere to see her.
To address your question, I would just tell her on the day that the EP is doing the assessment that she might be seeing a different teacher in school today who will want to play some games with her. At her age, that’s all she needs to know. If she asks why, just tell her it’s to see how well she’s working in school.

If she has any awareness I'd springboard off that.

e.g. You know how sometimes you don't finish your work as quickly as others?, well we are going to see someone and do some games with them to see if there is anything we can do to make things easier.

My kids really enjoyed their Ed Psych assessments - most of it is like puzzles and games, and the Ed Psych was really lovely; with my last one, we framed it as an assessment just to find out more about their learning style, and that it would be fun. Good luck :)

It's us seeking an assessment. We are going private. The school didn't think it was necessary at this point.

Oh thank you for your replies. That's very helpful. Games abd puzzles sounds good, she'll love that :)

We went to an ADHD assessment when DD was that age. We just said we needed to chat with someone about the way she is at school and home and see if they have any suggestions how to make life easier for her.

It was actually a chat with us, DD was sitting in a corner colouring and the assessor observed her, sometimes drawing her into a conversation.

When she had her ASD assessment years later, it was a lot of puzzles, talks, describing pictures and making up a story. Very unassuming. DD knew what was going on though.

The Ed Psychologist should have a FAQ saying what the assessment involves and you should then sit with DD and go through the FAQ with her so she isn’t put on the spot and surprised. Mine did memory and problem solving games that involved maths and literacy.

I would explain to DD that this type of psychologist looks at how different children learn differently, and that they are not for children with mental health problems so there is nothing wrong with her.

Explain that schools are set up to teach only one way that works for most children, but not all children. Explain how some children learn best by reading, others by listening, others by watching and still others by doing. Schools don’t have time to teach all the different ways at once, so they teach the ways that most average children learn.

But as that is unfair for some special children who learn differently but are just as smart and hardworking, these special children then see a Ed Psychologist to find out the best way for them to be taught through add ons or extra tutoring. After testing, the psychologist then gives the school a plan on how best to teach the child, so school is fair for everyone.

Just makes it sound low key but fun, because that's what it will be like anyway. My DD has lots of assessments and appointments and it's always just "we're going to play some games with a lady" to which her main concern is will there be toys in the waiting room. It's how they do it at school too, she will just tell me "I got chosen to play the games with the visitor today and she gave me a sticker" when I know she's had a speech therapy assessment or something like that. Don't build it up into a big thing.

Thank you @KestrelMoon and @reluctantbrit and everyone else. That's very helpful. I'll refer back to this thread again closer to the time.

just this, you can make it sound like it's a usual thing that happens without making her nervous and .when one of mine were seen the phsy Ed was lovely and didn't make it a big deal they will do this with your dd.

Absolutely this, no more of a big thing then going to the dentist, just a chat with someone to see how her learnings going. At 6, she doesn't know it's not an every day occurrence.

We are going to meet with someone who will help us understand how you learn to make sure your teacher can give you the help you need in class and I can help you at home too

I’ve just noticed that you mentioned your dd is 6.5 - have you checked with the Ed Psych that they can do all the tests they need to at that age? We did the same - went at about 6.5 years, and were told afterwards that all of the tests couldn’t be completed due to age, but got a report with recommendations, but no definite diagnosis, more of a ‘likely’ diagnosis. We went back for a second test when my dc was around 8-9, and got a full test and a definite diagnosis. Worth double checking with the EP first, maybe?

Thank you. I did check with them a few months ago when I put her on the waiting list and they said, indeed, they usually wait until the children are 7, but that they'll get someone who specialises in early years. I'll double check with them again to be honest.

My son had his first EP at about the same age.
She observed him in school for the morning and then sat down with him 121 and just sat and played and talked.

I wouldn't worry too much as they are trained to do their assessments in a way that you wouldn't think was an assessment of sorts, just a chat with an adult ☺️

We were just honest with him and said there was a lady who would be coming to see him today to find out all about him, that it was nothing to worry about and that she was really kind. He didn't think much more of it, and then talked her ears off 🤣

And just whilst I re-read the post above me, my son also had 2 observations, the second was more of a follow up and a progress check.
We had comprehensive reports from both with indications of needs, however, this is not enough in my trust, so we are still awaiting our local team to come in to see him (NHS) after having to wait 18 months for his assessment with them at the clinic. They told us it would probably be a year before they came into school and then went to panel for a diagnosis of needs 😭😭😭

My DD enjoyed her EP assessment, it was a long time ago but it wasn’t scary or overwhelming.

We told her that someone was going to help us to understand how she learns best so that we can make sure she is well supported in school. Which is exactly what happened!