It's a leap year...and I want to propose.

[TheSparkling]

Please tell me if I'm mad. 😂

I'd love to hear any stories if you have proposed to your bf or partner and how it went.

And yes, i know it's the twenty first century and women can do whatever they want. But I'm a romantic deep down and want to get married. ☺

How long have you been with your partner?
Have you discussed marriage?
Do you think that you’re on the same page as regards that commitment?

If you've discussed marriage and both agree it's what you want then go for it. If it's a surprise proposal then no, I don't think anyone should be doing those in this day and age.

We've had discussions around living together and the future together and finances and lifestyle choices. Our aims and values are very similar.

We've been together three years and we are late forties / early fifties if that makes any difference.

I would want to be pretty certain he would say "yes" but if you are then go for it!

You don’t live together?

I’d be careful what you wish for…and take it one step at a time.

Any children from previous relationships? Sorry to be unromantic, but any major disparity in wealth / assets?

Good friend of mine proposed to her boyfriend in a leap year - they've been very happily married for 6 years now.

I think at our age (I'm 49) if a fella is put off by a woman being upfront and open he's probably best avoided anyway!

I didn't do this but I was considering it if my now dh didn't ask me before then. Turns out he did...

Since you asked 'am I mad?', it sounds like you have some concerns. What are you worried about? What would it mean for you, in your relationship, if he said no?

As long as you are comfortable with any outcome I say go for it, but I'd approach it more like a conversation than a down-on-one-knee type scenario.

Would you plan to marry before living together or move in while engaged?

We are moving in together very soon and very much spend lots of time together.
I have kids he doesn't, wealth isn't equal ( although not hugely opposite) but we've had serious conversations about that and we are on the same page with spending and future plans.

Interesting question about what if he said no. I'm not really convinced he would but it would lead to a more direct conversation about marriage.
We've had a few vague chats about it and I feel we are on the same page. Of course I could be wrong though.

I'd definitely do it before he moves in then!

Live with him before making any commitment. Dating and living together are very different.

I think a marriage should be a joint decision. If there has to be a proposal, it’s irrelevant who asks and when.

Go for it and be sure to update us

Well OP I don't know if this counts but I told DH that I required marriage before buying a house together. So technically, I was asking him to marry me. I wanted him to buy me the thing ring and stuff though.
We looked at some, but nothing happened , 6 months later he proposed (on our anniversary).

OK I guess it's not romantic for some people but worked for us. I wanted marriage and didn't want to be financially tied to someone dangling the carrot so there was a very clear incentive.

If no proposal was forthcoming I'd have asked him straight out and left if it was a wishy washy answer. I knew my DH wouldn't do that though. Because he's not that kind of man.

Make sure you let him know beforehand that if he refuses you he has to buy you a silk dress.

But I'm a romantic deep down and want to get married. ☺**

Get married or be married?

Two different things!!

I proposed on Feb 29th. We had sort of discussed marriage before and I was expecting him to say yes! No regrets - although I do occasionally think I wish there had been a grand romantic gesture for me rather than from me. But if you want to be married - does it matter who asks?

If your kids still live with you and therefore you’re all going to be moving in together, then I’d wait and see how that goes first.

op I think I’d open up a conversation first, and propose before he moves in. If you ask you should be sure he wishes to marry you. Otherwise you run the risk of him just saying yes as it’s so cringe to say no and then never intending to marry.