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Original poster

Am I supposed to take a present and card to a Bridal Shower?

34 replies

MrsCarson · 20/02/2024 10:50

I have no clue, first UK wedding for our family, all the women on my side are invited to an afternoon to meet all the brides side and friends. I'll get a card, but what about a present?

OP posts:
Whatwillbewilbe · 20/02/2024 13:31

In Scotland it was traditional to have a Show of Presents. The presents were displayed, normally in a bedroom, for those attending to admire. You had to make sure that you didn’t lay out two items of the same thing together, in the hope nobody noticed you had three toasters, four kettles, two pressure cookers and two electric knives. It was attended by relatives, friends and neighbours. Tea, buffet and alcohol were supplied by the bride’s family. We had one in the eighties, as did all my peers. They seem to have gone out of fashion now as I haven’t been to one in many years.

It was also an ideal opportunity for both mums to eye up any extra items that they could hint that they were in dire need of. 😂

Original poster
MrsCarson · 20/02/2024 15:42

mindutopia · 20/02/2024 11:19

I had a 'bridal shower' as it's more typical in the culture I grew up in. It was an afternoon BBQ at my family home. I didn't have a hen do. I don't know what's the norm for other people or what people would expect in the UK, but no one brought me any gifts and I didn't expect any.

That's good to know.
Brides family all Brits, not Asian, Grooms family not from UK and not Asian either.
Only wedding stuff I attended when in US was the rehearsal dinner the night before the wedding and never went to any bridal showers as no one we knew ever had one.
Presents were delivered to the Brides mother's house by the store where you bought off the list. This is why I'm not sure what happens.
I've been to baby showers so know what's expected of me there.
Maybe I'll get a card and some flowers.

OP posts:
itsgoingtobeabumpyride · 20/02/2024 18:58

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

I just said the tradition was wank not insulting anyone or the country.
It's a shame you're so lacking in intelligence that you had to try to come back and actually insult me.
Touch a nerve did I?
I suppose I'd be touchy if I lived in the land of Trump and Biden.
I'd rather be a wank brit than a "wank yank"

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Weddings
PandaChopChop · 20/02/2024 19:01

I've never heard of one! Hen do, yes, bridal shower, no!

Original poster
MrsCarson · 21/02/2024 16:11

user1471505356 · 20/02/2024 11:32

In Ireland it is usual to have a showing of the presents before the wedding possibly this is a Bridal Party.

I was telling my mother that this was something that used to happen. She said it's sounded lovely and a way to get the relatives introduced before the actual day. But she suggested that weddings seemed like more of a community type thing back in the day, where your neighbours were called Auntie and everyone wanted to be a part of celebrating.

OP posts:
PlumsInTheIcebox · 21/02/2024 16:19

Are they definitely referring to it as a 'shower', and do you think there's a possibility they don't know what this means? I only ask as there are perennial posts on here along the lines of 'I'm going to have a baby shower but I don't want people to bring gifts', which rather misses the point that a shower by definition is a party for the giving of gifts.

Berlinlover · 21/02/2024 16:27

user1471505356 · 20/02/2024 11:32

In Ireland it is usual to have a showing of the presents before the wedding possibly this is a Bridal Party.

I’m Irish and I’ve never head of that happening.

LoveFood · 21/02/2024 16:34

Hen dos are the more recent invention. Bridal showers are perfectly normal and old school, and they have simply evolved into the hen parties we have today.

A bridal shower is a get together of the female friends and family members ahead of the wedding. Traditionally, irritatingly silly games would often be played but I haven't been to one with that for a long time. Thank god. Small gifts absolutely expected - usually small, household type gifts plus possibly a few "naughty" gifts (that now would be at a hen party) although in my experience the older ladies enjoy being a bit frisky - I definitely got thongs from my mother's oldest friend! Grin. Mostly I got a bunch of useful, but slightly nicer household items like pretty tea towels, cute bottle openers, a cake stand etc. In my case, we did the bridal shower and then me and some of my girlfriends went out for a bit more a "hen party" in the form of dinner and drinks etc.

The 2 day, all singing, all dancing, all boozing hen party is the newer, odder invention.

LoveFood · 21/02/2024 16:36

Oh, I should clarify - I think the tradition is quite old as I'm from South Africa. It was definitely a tradition South Africans brought from England with them, but I've only been to a couple in England as I think it has largely died out. Although to be fair, it's usually dominated by female family and extended family so it might well be that some of my English friends have done this but I wasn't invited as certainly when I was attending weddings regularly, they were good friends but not like this. the ones I've been to here have been for extended family - cousins etc.

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