"Name changed as so outing"

[GlitteringUnicorn]

I see this often.
Is it a real thing?
Has anyone ever been recognised on a website this massive?
Even worse has anyone joined a thread to give their counter argument if they recognise themselves being malligned?!

People are protective of their privacy online which makes sense, especially in today's world.

I recognised a parent from the school I worked in.

All of his issues were our fault, apparently.

Pretty good going since he’d only been with us for 3 months, after moving schools twice due to them not being able to handle him…

It was interesting to see our failings listed in print.

I recognise a family member every time they name change as their posting style is so distinctive 🤣🤣🤣

I regularly recognise someone on here I know IrL. Across multiple user names and years.

Exactly. I don’t see why this is so hard to grasp?

I don’t do this, but I NC every week for the same reason.

And yes, I recognised someone about ten years ago. She used to post obsessively in Weight Loss and Exercise about her very specific routines and low-calorie shakes, but never that she was ‘saving’ calories to drink them.

I've recognised someone. It was the most innocuous statement they'd made as well. But it was on a topic that's not very common to many, but I know affects her, so seeing it in that context made me realise who it was.

I'm also sure I recognised someone because of a post they'd made about a specific work situation that they'd been telling me about for ages. But the thread was quickly deleted once a couple of posters suggested that maybe the OP was the problem. Very on form for her.

I agreed with the poster as well (only in my head, I didn't contribute to the post).

It can also be that the OP is going to post something embarrassing that they don’t want linked with their other posts.

I recognised two members of staff complaining about my then boss.
I didn't say anything but even I changed name pretty sharpish.

Think I'll do it again now, just in case!

This, people don't name change to mention the hobby they choose not to say what it is for that reason

I haven't been recognized but have seent this question asked enough times to know that it does happen and not infrequently

The trigger is "oh, that problem with the school sounds a bit like what my DSIL said was happening, but she never told us the bit about X. I wonder if it is her?" One quick AS later and you know that it is her, and the reason why their DS is moving schools is because they were caught cyberflashing.

I have recognised two people on here but they didn’t post anything embarrassing, just advice on something quite niche, so I don’t think they minded being recognised.

Whenever I'm wondering whether to NC I remember that the first line of Penis Beaker is "I considered name changing for this, but, fuck it". She ended up getting MNHQ to retrospectively change the name on all her old posts.

When in doubt, NC.

I’ve recognised people on here before a couple of times.

Often an individual post by itself isn’t totally identifying, but if information in that’s combined with other posts, then overall it can be very identifying.

So DH’s secret hobby might not be anything particularly unusual, but when it’s combined with other stuff the OP’s posted in other threads, it might be the last piece in the puzzle for someone who’s thinking “this sounds familiar, I wonder if OP could be my friend / colleague / relative X?”

Me too

I’m always interested in the other side to the story on here…

while there’s plenty where you know the OP is completely straight down the line, there are others where there definitely seems to be a back story.

did you post on his?

I could never be that saintly!

Someone was asking a question a few years ago. It is my DH area of research so if you google the subject you get him pop up with half a million hits so at that point I did use a one off name which I have never used again.

@OLDbutnotforgotten - I didn’t post, as much as I wanted to. I did show it to our SLT though, whether that was ethical or not, I don’t know. It’s good to be informed, I think?

How do they know how many posts someone has?

They search for the poster’s username.

I recognised a family member on here as they had posted a picture of their cat and I had seen the same picture on FB the day before.

I know that my daughter sometimes reads MN so I think carefully before posting anything that she might know was me and I do a one off name change if I think that is the case e.g. posting pictures of my arts and crafts efforts which I may have posted in the family WhatsApp.

I've posted before - on another forum I recognised my aunt's friend's DD because she posted a small detail about something innocuous that went wrong at her wedding. After that, I learned that this woman I had never met was TTC, what she thought of her MIL etc.

I'm very conscious that I'm recognisable on here - the combination of my current job, previous job, sex and location (all of which I have posted about) narrows me down to two people. Ages of my DC narrows it down to just me. So I try to be aware of that, and if I post something personal I try to remember to name change.

Years and years and many name changes and another account ago, I offered advice to a woman who was having issues with her bank. I worked there in complaints at the time so I put a lot of info on here about what she should say to get the 'right' responses.

The following day she called in and I recognised her from the situation, although it was quite a bit different from the bank's side than she was (presumably) aware.

I know personally I can be a bit lax about personal data and try to name change often, but I know I don't do it often enough.

I am recognised ALL THE TIME! I name change quite a lot. Mostly for fun, and then also to throw off people who don't know me, as in, I wouldn't want randoms to start piecing my posts together and then to follow me out of interest! But I write in a similar way every time really, so my friends and family usually spot me and message me to say 'is that you?!', then we talk about the responses!

Anything I post about I've spoken to them about a gazzilion times in detail, so there is nothing new. I mostly post about myself, but when I have complained about someone, to be honest if they read it and recognise themselves it might help them with some reflection? I have read bits once or twice on here posted by two people I know and I changed my behaviour as a result, as I didn't realise I was causing an issue for them, and it was nothing for me to just stop that.

It would be great for to people to just communicate more transparently, really, then we'd all have fewer hang ups and everyone's mental health would be far better because we'd see how similar we really all are.

I'm not a huge poster, I can't come onto mumsnet as much as I'd like, but I have seen some similar names post about similar issues (DV, childhood trauma etc), and so conversely, sometimes seeing the same name pop up makes me sad that the person remains so traumatised, but I never say anything there.