Hi everyone, I have seen lots of similar chats online and kind of always knew I would reach the point where I might be feeling this way too but I am just looking for ideas really...on how to 'cope' when my youngest starts school in September. It is taking up a lot of my head space at the moment and causing me lots of anxiety. I work 3 days a week and the other 2 days are currently spent with my daughter (and we have had this set up for the last 3 years since I returned to work when she was 1). It is a really precious time to me, as with my eldest (who is now nearly 8), I really didn't have that much time with him after I went back to work when he was a year old and it caused me lots of feelings of sadness/guilt. When my daughter came along in 2020, I made a very conscious effort to fight for part time hours with my employer when I negotiated my return to work so that I could spend more time with her during her preschool years and it has been really wonderful. We see friends with similar aged kids every week, we do swimming lessons and we do lots of activities at home. We live in London and there is so many great activities to do together, i feel like we are running out of time to do them all! I feel bereft at the thought of this period of time ending and her starting school which I know is great for their development etc, but I also know from experience with my son that when they start school they start to have more independence from you and generally their 'own' lives (which is obvs great for them but sad for us as they don't need us quite so much any more!). I just feel really sad at the thought that these lovely 'simpler' years are coming to an end. Don't get me wrong, toddlers/young kids can be a handful and a right pain at times, and oh so tiring, but I do love this age so much. They are still so cute, innocent and funny! I think I have put a lot of emphasis on how 'precious' these years are and it's now giving me so much anxiety at the thought of it coming to an end. It's keeping me awake at night, I think about it every day but am not sure how to help comfort myself by making a plan of what to do about it, if that makes sense!
All of this is also not helped by me feeling at a big cross roads career-wise. As I have put any career progression to one side for the last 8 years since having my eldest, I now feel this pressure to make changes and finally do something i really love. I have been in the same job for 16 years! The issue is, I don't have a clue where to start to make that change, and I also want to protect some level of part time working as my husband works long hours in a full time job and I feel for our family's ongoing work/life balance that it would be important for me to be around a bit more during the week (My ideal would be to continue working 3 days a week, 4 at a push).
To top it all, I recently turned 40 and have struggled a bit with feelings of getting old/past it and not really 'knowing' where or how I fit into society any more (other than being a mum).
So i guess I have three questions in one......how to best prepare for when my littlest starts school (ideas of lovely things to do together to make really special memories before September?? Any great ways to log those memories?)....how to go about making a career change which lets me continue to have flexibility around my family, and how to stop feeling like a frump at 40!!
So only a few minor things...... ;-)
Anyone else feeling these things??!!