Gym changing rooms - hypothetical question

[chocolatesaltyballs22]

So you're getting changed in the ladies changing room at the gym (no private cubicles, all open plan) and a woman walks in with an older teen boy. Would you point out to them that this is the ladies changing room? Or would you just ignore them and get changed.

People are just doing whatever they like then hiding behind all this gender stuff

I've since looked up my gym's policy on this and it states that people must use the changing room assigned for the gender they were born with.

This sounds like complete made-up bollocks.

Would you move down the room from a teenage lesbian?

Teenage lesbian is not an issue in a women's changing room.

A teen male would be an issue, even if they 'identify as female'.

It is a conundrum these days OP, as we can no longer rely on male decency not to enter female single sex spaces.

... and thus it can be more of a problem for gender non conforming girls.

A lesbian isn't a man, and has every right to be I the female changing room. It's about respect for people's safety, dignity and privacy, not weather or not someone might be attracted to them.

What is the difference?

Well, just for a start, a teenage lesbian probably wouldn't be able to overpower an adult woman, at the very least they would be roughly matched. My 13 year old son is already stronger than me, so a teenage boy could reasonably be assumed to be stronger than the majority of women...

I would have also pointed out that it was the female changing room.

Following her response, if I was sure it was a boy, I would have complained to reception, if they didn't act then I would leave. When I joined my gym last year I specifically asked about changing rooms being single biological sex and was assured they were.

What was the reaction of the child when you spoke to the grandmother?

I can assure you it's 100% not made up bollocks. And if some people don't know the difference between a female lesbian and a boy then they need to go back to school for more biology lessons.

The 'child' looked uncomfortable when I pointed out that it was the female changing room.

What did the child look like? What causes to think they are male?

I’m just trying to understand the attitude of the grandma.

I don’t understand.

Why would anyone move down the room from a teenage lesbian in a female changing room?

I'd have said something. Last time I did because a boy looked 10-11. Apparently he had early onset puberty.

Like a teenage boy. Boy's haircut, boy's clothing, no boobs whatever which would have been present in a girl of that age.

I hate what the world has become..

Basically, any guy, at any time can walk on the women's changing room as long as they tell someone they identify as a woman.

Yep, me too. And the worse thing is I don't want to go back at the same time tomorrow in case they're there again. I'm worried to use my gym which I pay a fortune for.

It was mortifying. I could hear them talking about he from the other side of the changing room.

You were absolutely right to speak up. If the kid was a non-conforming girl, no harm done to her from a moment of mistaken identity. Has happened to many of us. If the kid was a boy then he should not have been there and his presence should be challenged. Unfortunately, the grandmother's response doesn't actually tell you anything shit the kid, because it could still have been her grandson and she was going along with him self-IDing as a girl.

Whether it was a boy with special needs was also irrelevant. That's what accessible and family changing spaces are for.

Sorry for the random 'shit'! Autocorrect - was meant to say 'about'.

That’s something to take up with the gym. They may have the child and grandmother’s details and so be able to act from knowledge.

It is ludicrous that a teen male can say they are a girl and there is n way to challenge it.

The reason OP moved was because she didn't want a "teenage boy" looking at her body.

Surely if the gyms policy is that people must use the changing room of the sex they were born, then there would be no issue expecting them to leave, though in this day and age I’m surprised they get away with stating that

Oh please.

Expensive gym, you pay for them to deal with this.

Yeah but what are you meant to do when they respond to your challenge like they did? I'm hardly going to go stomping to reception wrapped in my towel am I?

Absolutely agree, moving away was probably the best thing, then tell the staff after