Should I go to this funeral?

[Getonnow]

I do some voluntary work, one of the service users took his own life. Very very sad, he was using our service because of his vulnerabilities and we're not a suicide prevention intervention, but one of many agencies who should have been "there" for him.

Anyway, our supervisor has offered the option of attending the funeral, man's wife has said that's OK. I suspect it's a funeral where there won't be many attendees. I didn't know him well and had no personal connection, but liked him and felt for his circumstances.

Should I go?

Absolutely. It will be a great comfort to his wife.

Gosh difficult. Is your organisation sending a representative?
I probably would want to go.

It would be a nice thing to do.

Sorry I meant to say I probably wouldn't want to go. However, you say you liked him so don't feel you shouldn't if you want too.

If you liked him, and his wife and your supervisor both say it's ok, what are your doubts about going? If you don't want to that's fine, but are there reasons you think you shouldn't?

I don't especially want to go. I'd have to move an appointment, but I could. I'm wondering if I "should".

Oh I see, I thought you meant the other way round. No, if your gut reaction is not to go, or if you have prior commitments, I don't think you 'should' at all. I don't think it would be expected.

No don't feel you "should ".

My father always said that if you felt you wanted to go , then you should. I am sure his wife would appreciate you being there.

Definitely.

I think I would in your shoes, especially as it’s been “signed off” by your supervisor and his widow is ok with it. I get the sense from your post that you feel it’s the right thing to do.

Hmm, no I wouldn't go but mostly, don't go on a guilt trip because you haven't attended, it would be nice but as you said, you weren't close and a representative is going to be there, go to your appointment.

Definitely.

If it was logistically viable, I probably would. It often brings comfort to loved ones to have some wider community support at such a difficult time.