I turn 40 in a few weeks and my friend has suggested a spa day/break to celebrate. I said yes initially as I do like treatments but the idea of having to be in the spa area with my swimming costume is making me feel ill with anxiety. I am very overweight and I have awful spider veins all over my legs. I know it shouldn't matter what I look like but I hate my body and don't want to have to show it off, especially next to my friend who is stunning. We haven't booked anything yet but I really don't want to go and I feel like I need to let her know because I know she wouldn't want me to feel bad. Similarly, I don't want to spoil her fun either.
Do I suggest we go and stay in the hotel and perhaps have a facial but I opt out of the actual spa session or is that lame? I don't want to spend loads of money on something where I'm going to feel humiliated. I am trying to do something about my weight but I'm a binge eater and it's gotten worse in the last six months.
I know this is all my fault but I'm just dreading it and I know even if I was to go on a crash diet I wouldn't be able to look any better in time.