Genuine question: how do dog owners cope with the idea their dogs can turn at any time?

[Simblythebestie]

Have always wondered this and I'm honestly not attempting to be goady. Do you ever wonder about your dog - particularly a large breed - turning and biting you and causing damage to you or your kids? The idea of this would terrify me and is one of the reasons we'd never got a dog. Do you always know what they are thinking when they are looking at you? That's something else I've always wondered about. Or do you feel you know a dog after you've been living together for a period of time?

OP I think you are thinking about XL bullies or Cane Corsos. For some reason Facebook shows me videos of these brutes next to toddlers etc and I think that's horrifically dangerous.

But dogs have been socialised and have evolved to live with humans for thousands of years. They don't just turn on you any more than your husband or friend or colleague might suddenly turn on you.

I think what you don't realise is how much a member of the family they are. Generally you have had them since they were eight weeks old, you have trained them to know that you are the boss, and they are happy with that hierarchy and wouldn't dream of turning on you. They love you like you're their mother.

I see where you're coming from. I've had dogs all my life, and I'd say I'm very good at reading them, and that I have no concerns whatsoever about my current dog. But I'm almost certain that owners who are attacked by their own dogs would probably say the same thing.

Whatever people like to say, breed does come into it massively. My granny had a collie who got very blind and grumpy in her old age, and who would growl and even nip. But she was never going to lock her jaws and maul someone to death. Even so, she was always shut in the utility room if there were children visiting.

I imagine it largely depends on the breed and the quality of training the dog has had

but also there are many owners who are in total denial that their dog could bite a child - it’s all ‘ my dog would never…’
my cousins very docile dog bit my daughter years ago. Just randomly turned on my then 2 year old - she did not have it put down. She wasn’t required to.

Wellllllllll..... One is only because it's physiologically impossible 🙈 Second was all the rage few years back with poop transplants...

I have a rescue dog who when we got her was fear aggressive. She would resource guard and didn't like to be touch around her face and head. She's a medium sized dog that I knew both my husband or I could deal with should we need to.

We made adjustments in our life to help her and keep us all safe until she felt comfortable, especially with regard to her proximity to our daughter and visitors to our house.

We have now had her for 2 years, and she's a completely different animal who we don't need to maintain those adjustments for. She's still treated with kindness and respect.

I don't 100% trust her, but then I didn't with my old dog either. Any dog could bite in the wrong combination of circumstances.

A dog's body language will change if it's agitated, upset or scared. An experienced owner will recognise this. Scared dogs attack.

I don't believe dogs usually attack for no reason. They are scared , have found someone's behaviour unpredictable/ confusing or protecting their territory.

It's giving a dog a human trait to think it will attack out of sheet deviousness.

I grew up with dogs, up to five at a time and all big. None of them ever turned or bit anyone. I've got a little terrier now and I can't trust her near small animals or pigeons- she's always on the lead out and about anyway because she's deaf.

I watch my daughter with her, I've taught the child how to be around dogs and she's given plenty of exercise and games so she's never bored or frustrated. (Dog, although I suppose the child as well.) I never left them alone together but I never actually got the chance because the dog follows me everywhere.
She doesn't get treated like a human, she's a dog and she's got her rules and boundaries. I've had her eight years.

I was brought up around dogs but didn’t get my own until DS was nine. The entire family went to the puppy training classes right through until Kennel Club gold as it was as important for us to learn as it was for the dog.

The only time our dog snapped was at me and it was so unusual that I took him straight to the vets where it turned out he had pancreatitis and was in a lot of pain.

I do however have a nasty scar on my arm from the cat, one on my finger after being bitten by my hamster and have had several broken bones from horses.

@Nofilteritwonthelp I don't think most people are rational. People react emotionally and then justify it. A bit like the way you are doing with all that toilet talk.

I think it's probably not huge. I hold my hands up we didn't train our previous dog well/properly. But she was soft as a brush and an intelligent breed who just did recall etc.

When we got our new dog we did things very differently. She went to training classes to master the basics and had 1-2-1 training sessions for the first 18 months of having her. Now we regularly re affirm her training to ensure we have good control of her, plus it's good enrichment for her.

Very odd post. It's a bit like asking how do you cope knowing your husband/partner could attack you at any time.

My friend got a rescue dog and thought it was exhibiting cute behaviour. Then it bit her dad, then it bit her little nephew so they decided to get training as a last resort before putting it down. She was shocked that all of this behaviour was actually not cute and learnt so much, it was interesting to hear about and made me think I bet most people are completely clueless as to their animals behaviour

@Justfinking definitely! We had had a dog for 15 years but there were still clues with new dogs behaviour that we were missing. We know her and understand her so much better now.

I genuinely think all dog owners should have to some form of basic dog training.

I work with dogs and have done for over 20 years. I can tell when a dog is likely to bite me and have only ever been bitten once, which was neither the dogs fault nor my own (illness)
It’s highly unlikely for an otherwise friendly dog to suddenly turn for no reason, even an XL bully. I would never trust a dog 100% around children, both can be unpredictable and therefore shouldn’t be left alone together. But I think you can be fairly comfortable that a well socialised well cared for dog isn’t just going to attack out of the blue for no reason at all

I don’t know if you’re aware of this but as it seems you havnt spent much time with dogs you may not.

when you play with a dog in a “rough house way” they actively avoid hurting you, they pretend to “bite” and “growl” but it’s very gentle, they love you and don’t want to hurt you, and if they do by accident and you yelp as you got caught as they were going for a toy, they instantly stop playing and come to you to check you’re not hurt.

I have an elderly pug. The only one likely to be damaged is him from when the cats chase him 😂

I picked a breeed that isnt known for agression, is smaller and waited until my youngest was 11 as 'safety'
i dont think dogs brought up not experience fear/violence do generally just turn around and bite, they give signals in a lead up agression so you can avoid it.
However i do think people are mad leaving younger children alone with dogs, even good tempered family dogs and people should be aware of the risk.

Lots of older dogs suddenly get snappy when they very ill, its one of the things thst people realise its time to let go and put them down.

OP, thank you very much for not having a dog, it is the best decission you could possibly take for the dog, and yourself.
Please do not keep animals, you do not sound wired for it at all.

My dog has the weakest jaw and the sweetest nature. From a puppy, we've trained her to remove herself from any situation that she finds stressful rather than reacting aggressively. I feel like I can predict her response in almost any situation because I know her so well.

I still wouldn't leave her alone with my toddler or any other kids (mainly because I don't trust them not to biff her!)

Problem is Mumsnet is full of perfect dog owners who's dogs are perfectly trained and would never step a foot out of line.

In my experience about 2% of the dog owners I've come across could actually back this up. When out and about I am constantly bothered by dogs either on or off lead. With owners either says 'oh I'm so sorry they don't normally do that' or 'they won't harm'. The ones who are actually obedient are few and far between. I think a lot of people have rose tinted glasses thinking they have control of their dog(s). And are very blaze when they jump or bother people out and about.

Far too many owners think they have control of their dogs when they actually don't

I have a golden retriever. More likely to sniff or lick me to death. Not an aggressive bone in her body.

The only danger would be her over exuberance at seeing people, she just loves everyone, so she might knock someone over, but this is something I manage as I know my dog.

How do dog owners cope with the idea their dogs can turn at any time?

The same way that we cope with the idea that the human beings around us can turn at any time.
Imagine an alien from another planet, learning about all the terrible crimes of violence that human beings perpetrate on one another. They might ask the sample human that they had abducted "How can you cope with living alongside such fearsome creatures?" And the sample human would say "Well, all humans are different. Only a few are violent, and in any case there are a million subtle signs that reassure me that the humans I live and work with will use their words, or gentle body language if they get pissed off or frightened. They would only hurt me if I ignored these to a HUGE degree and acted very very insensitively."

And yet, statistically, men are several orders of magnitude more dangerous to women than dogs are.

I'm suggesting we should live in fear of our partners by the way - just pointing out that it we don't know for a fact that any living being which is physically stronger than us isn't going to kill us, but we still form relationships with them!

@MushMonster lols don't worry it's not on the card for me due to an early very scary experience which has left me frightened for life! I don't know much about dogs really hence the post.

So it does sound as though dogs bite when they are in pain. That's interesting. I wonder whether people are aware of this when they have little experience and take on a big breed.

I was brought up with unneutered dogs as DF needed working dogs (kept in kennels not in house) and bred them (not to sell) - after seeing some real dogfights as a child I would always worry a dog could turn. Most people have no idea.