Can you / how to make friends in your 50s?

[hopeishere]

I've spent the weekend at home with DH and DSs. I realised there was about one person I could have messaged to meet for coffee. I don't want a social whirl but would like a few more friends.

I joined a class a while ago but didn't make any friends at it.

Is it possible to make friends as an adult in your 50s or not? I'm not sporty so don't want to join a gym or exercise class.

Yes I was going to say join a daytime class - have you considered Pilates? But if not that something else?

Not sporty

Perhaps you can focus on what you are rather than not ?

Round here there are loads of activities to join in - art ( paint, draw, metalwork, write) or music ( sing play dance ) or history ...

And remember it takes a long time to go from aquantaince to friend

I work full time so a day time class wouldn't work. I did reformer for a bit but again everyone just left after class.

I might get in touch with an old friend to see if they want to meet for coffee even though it's been years.

What about a walking group, walking tends to be more sociable as its natural to chat whilst walking.

Following

I'm not in my 50s yet but I find it really hard.

I just feel like people aren't bothered about meeting up with other people.
People just want to stay with who they've got.
I get disappointed by it

Through volunteering?

I’m in a walking group and most common age is 50’s and lots of friendships formed plus we walk 3 x a week in summer (twice in winter)

Volunteering. I joined a load of committees and boards , some were painfully dull so I stood down after a respectful amount of time. A couple have stuck and I’ve made a great new network

A library book club?

Not (quite) 50, but I've made friends through my book club and language classes.

Bumble BFF is good, I've met a couple of new friends on there.

How many miles do you walk can I ask?

Try Meetup for walking groups. Great fun and very inclusive. Walks are 4 to 10 miles to suit everyone. It's very friendly and there are lots of different groups.

Usually 5-7 miles per week, we did do 8.5 last week but that’s not usual. We normally work for 90mins - 2hrs

Do you have any colleagues you like/get on well with, no matter what age? If so, suggest you meet up for coffee, lunch or an activity you think they'd be interested in. At some point in every job I've done this, sometimes with people my own age, sometimes with older people who I just got on with. You might build a friendship through it, or just feel it's nice to have someone else to do something with occasionally.

Alternatively, just get yourself out. Find a class you enjoy so you've got others around you, if not an activity you'd enjoy doing on your own, ie I often take myself off for a nice walk, bike ride, coffee and cake on my own.

If you're on facebook, might be worth searching on there for friendship groups. DD found one for the 20-30 age group after she returned from uni, she mets up with a group occasionally and has one girl from the group she sees on her own occasionally as well.

I have very recently made a friend through Pilates. She was new to the group and we just got chatting.
Another recent friend was from an activity DD does. Parents tend to stay and watch, and I got chatting to her too. It helped that her DD and mine really got on too, so we meet up for them too.
Do you take your DSs to any activities? Can you strike up a conversation at any of the groups you go to?

Meetup is a good app x

Kids are too old for activities. I did meet a few mums from where they were at school and see them occasionally.

I'll look at some of the groups suggested.

I do like my own company and wouldn't think twice about going for coffee on my own and I love walking the dog by myself, but it was just the weekend loomed a bit and I was very aware I didn't have one person I could message to grab a quick coffee.

It’s a numbers game, it’s easy to make acquaintances but harder to make decent friends. I have retired early in my mid fifties and await younger DH so have a lot of time on my hands and the friends I already have all work FT. I have tried three voluntary projects, all interest me and in doing so have met many people both women and men. I have made a couple of decent friends.