61 and miss my grandparents

[Elvanseshortage]

I am tearful this evening because I have been listening to some music which reminds me of my grandparents. It has brought back so many memories of them. The smell of their houses, the food they cooked, the flowers in their garden, their dignity and wisdom (they lived through both wars).

As I get older I realise how much my birth and childhood must have meant to them. We go through parenthood and grandparenthood feeling that we are just putting one foot in front of another. In fact we are laying down vivid and intense memories for future generations. No point or questions. Just that.

I’d give anything to spend an hour with my beautiful Nan. She died in
my home country a week before DS was born so sadly due to my pregnancy I couldn’t fly home before she died. I’m sad that she never got to meet my son, whom I know she would have adored.
She was the loveliest Grandmother and made all of her grand children feel like they were her favourite. We all still fight over who was her ‘real’ favourite. It was me.

Yes I feel that about my parents - I didn't know my grandparents. I'm 61 and my mother died nine years ago, my Dad 15. My husband 14. Thank goodness for my children.

Crying reading these

What a beautiful post op.

I miss my grandfather more and more with every day year that passes, he died 20 years ago. He was wonderful.

Beautiful post.

I miss my grandparents so much. I think of them often. In fact, I had a really vivid dream about my nanna and grandad the other night. I like to think it's real, they're still there but just on a parallel plane that sometimes malfunctions and lets us meet ❤️

Oddly I started really missing mine almost straight after my parents died. 💕

I think of my Nana most days, she was my favourite person, I used to stay at her house most weekends and she let me do all kinds of mad things like make ‘George’s marvellous medicine’ by mixing random things from her kitchen up in a bowl and stay up late watching the boxing. I think she was one of the only people in my life who would just let me be me. I’m so grateful to have had her in my life.

It’s the reason that no matter how much my mum or my in-laws annoy me I’ll always encourage a relationship with my children, because I can tell they really love them to.

My maternal grandad died suddenly when I was 4. I’m 62 now and I still cry. I visit the crematorium every year on the anniversary. My mum used to when she was alive and I know she’d want me to still go. His death changed me even at that young age. I was never anxious before; I was happy x

I'm 43 and am lucky to only have lost my Grandmas in the last couple of years, both in their 90s.

It's such a special relationship and I cherish every memory. My own darling Dad has dementia aged 66 and my dc are only 16 and 12 respectively. They should have years more of that love and I could weep for their loss, even before it has happened.

I hear you. My grandmother has been gone nearly 35 years and I've been missing her a lot lately maybe because DCs are near the age I was when she died. She was a story book grandmother and always had time to just 'be'. Enjoying homemade soup, a daytrip to the beach, learning to knit jumpers for my teddy as she made one for me. I talk about her a lot and teach DCs what she taught me hoping they will carry on her memory when I'm gone.

I’m 48 and I often miss my great aunt. She was such a strong presence in my life. There was a great stoicism in that generation and she embodied it

I miss my DGM so much. A gentle Irish woman who cared so much for me. She was a remarkable woman who has inspired me all my life. And she could cook, oh could she cook.

Change Nan to Granny and that's my memories too!

I remember so much about mine- my feelings of security when I was with them. Everything had a routine and there was huge comfort in that. My grandma baking- pies, baked egg custards with nutmeg, Maids of Honour, jam tarts, apple pies, cheese and onion flans, fairy cakes, sandwich cakes. My grandad and his pipe- I still have his tobacco pot (it's ceramic) and it still smells of the tobacco, 30 years later. He had an allotment and used to chase me round it- I can remember shrieking and laughing and my mam telling him off because he had chest problems. He grew tomatoes, runner beans, peas, rhubarb, potatoes, carrots, cabbages, leeks and flowers- rows of brightly coloured dahlias, roses, hollyhocks and all kinds of old-fashioned cottage garden flowers. They weren't at all wealthy and had very simple lives but I loved being with them- he played a mouth organ and could tap-dance. She liked Scottish country dancing.🙂

Thank you for posting, I miss my Grandparents every day too.

What a lovely OP. I’m 63 I still miss my Granny she was such a huge part of my life. She taught me how to read, how to cook, knit, sew. She taught me about the birds and which ones came from what county in the summer. She taught me about wild flowers, trees, county ways. She was bought up in rural Oxfordshire and we had to cheer the Oxford rowers in the boat race every year (it’s something I still do). I used to sit on her lap and she would read The Robin Family to me form her woman’s weekly magazine. She made me feel loved and safe.

All these things I try and do with my own grandchildren, they even call me Granny. I want them to have the childhood that I had with her, with me.

Thank you Granny, you were/are the best. Xx

My grandma always speaks so lovingly of her grandma, too. I love that these special relationships go back through the generations, it makes me feel so connected to them & that it's a wonderful feeling that however hard things could be, that strong rope of love binds us back for 100 years or moee

This is so lovely to read and has triggered me in a good way. I'm 54 now, lost my grandparents in my early 30's. Miss them every day, even now. Had a family do at the weekend with all my cousins and we all had lovely stories about our Nan and what she did for us and meant to us. Aren't we lucky that we had them? It's ok to feel like this

Thank you for this reminder that I need to treasure my remaining grandparent. I'm lucky enough to be well into my 40s and still have a grandmother living. She's in her late 90s but still very fit and well. She's been such an important part of my life but these days what with kids and work and life I don't see her nearly as much as I should. I'll regret that when she's gone

It would have been my grandma's birthday today. I'm missing her lots. I was with her when she died and it was a few years ago no, but at times like this it doesn't feel real. She was such a huge part of my life and childhood.

Sending love op I feel you!

Now I've become a Grandparent I realise how my Grandparents felt about me . I love them and I miss them and I hope to meet them in the afterlife if it exists x

Just do it O/P . Before it's too late .

My mother is over 90 and still talks about her own grandmother every day. She remarked recently that she took her grandmother’s way of being with her as the model for how she herself fulfils her grandparent role.

I miss my Nan every day, she was wonderful and was always so loving and caring. I’ve found out so much, since she died, about what an awful life she had and it breaks my heart for her. I wish my DCs could have met her, she would have loved them with all her heart. 💜

That is so true.

I love that grandparents can show us what it is like to give love and security unconditionally. I think my grandparents were special but I think most people who have lived a long life have learned a lot from it and know what things are important and can give that wisdom back. It’s only now that I realise it.

I also understand what joy my birth I must have brought my grandparents. My parents loved me, but like lost parents their lives were filled with busyness and the anxiety of making sure they did the right things and paid the bills. Sometimes you can take your life for granted but I think you are always grateful for a grandchild.