Driving- am I bad?

[CoffeeLover90]

Yes, I'm probably overthinking. But humour me. I've had three 90 minute lessons and I still haven't mastered pulling up on the kerb. Instructor said after lesson 3 or 4 I should drive home from the quiet industrial estate we use. I've block booked 10 lessons and now wondering if I've wasted money. But I do feel determined. Not driving has held me back for years.
So my question would be- how many lessons before you were on a road with regular traffic flow?
Thanks 😁

I wouldn't worry at all. Took me ages. It comes easier to some than others. And apparently, the younger, the faster we pick it up, according to research. Don't give up. You'll get there. It's not a linear process.

First lesson I was on the road. What do you mean pulling up on the kerb? You should be parking at the side of the kerb surely?

Why do you need to pull up on the kerb? Are you saying you havent been on a road in 3 lessons? I started on the road

Yeah, I'm not a young learner, as such, mid 30s. No prior experience at all.
I did mean pull in by the kerb, sorry.
I've not known anyone who has had their first lesson on the road, unless there'd been some previous experience, and I understand why I haven't yet. But I was worried that my learning pace was too slow. I can't increase the number of lessons due to work.

It took me a year to learn to drive, and after I passed my test I never really drove again. It isn't for everyone.

Do you mean when the instructor tells you pull up in a safe place on the road? Which part do find difficult?

Also if you’ve only been driving around a quiet estate for 3 90 min lessons, this probably explains why you’re not feeling confident. Best thing is just do practice on the actual road. Wondering why the instructor is only taking you there, unless your anxiety levels are quite high …?

I had a few lessons and a few tests…my driving was less than perfect but I practiced the routes again and again (roundabouts were my weakness). The more you do it, the better you will become, don’t give up! I’ve been driving for a few years and although some areas make me a bit nervous, I just get in the car and go. It’s the best cure, and gives you a sense of achievement at the end!!

I'm sorry to hear that, I have always wanted to at least have a go. It was always the cost holding me back. Instructor is very reassuring and I know I'm not all bad as it's not the same mistake over and over, it's different ones each time - steer too much, too little, break too hard, don't break enough.

I was on the road first lesson, so was everyone I know. A quiet road, but a road. It had a roundabout on either end and we just went up and down it for the first lesson. You may as well have a friend teach you in an empty car park if you’re not on a road anyway. You can learn the clutch still that way if that’s what you’re having issues with.

but If that’s how your instructor teaches and you’re happy, it doesn’t really matter if you’re slow or not does it?

if it’s too slow for you, you can get a different instructor or switch the automatic

Huh? You should be driving in a road with an instructor not on a quiet industrial estate. They have dual controls so it's safe.

I would change instructor if they've not done that in 4.5 hrs.

All my DCs were on the road from lesson 1 and one was pretty nervous before starting.

Yes, 'pull up on the left safely' It's the whole thing, mirrors and signal no problem. Then I make a different mistake each time.
Anxiety is definitely high, if anyone gets too close behind me I panic. I did a roundabout, I've done different bends, I had to manoeuvre between 2 parked cars at one point. All fine. It seems that I get the breaking right but the cars too far out, I get one thing right then mess up something else. You drivers make this look too easy.

You don't know anyone who started on the road on their first lesson? That's very, very odd. I know a lot of teenagers plus my own and every single one has been on the normal roads first lesson. My friend at 40 has just passed in 3 months and went on the road first lesson too.

I don’t think I know anyone who didn’t do their first lesson on the road, is your instructor holding you back to get more business from you? It all sounds very weird. What are you doing in all your lessons?

Everyone I know started driving round the industrial estates, there's a lot round here, they're not quiet really. Even during the lessons I'm passing at least 2 learners.
It's an automatic.
I'll drive around the industrial estate, including a mini roundabout, different bends and a hill. Then pull up on the left every so often. I don't think he is holding me back, when I realised I was anxious about other vehicles in my first lesson he brought me to much busier industrial estate for the weeks after.

Don't worry OP, it takes a while to get the knack for it, especially if it doesn't come naturally to you. I was, (and am) still shit at driving, and I've had years of experience.

I passed my test first time, but, I think tests now are harder, especially if you have to take it in a busy city. You will get the hang of it, just keep doing it, that's the key, you must keep doing it, again and again and again.

My instructor told me to stop thinking of it a driving a car, but to think of the car as an extension of myself, so the tyres were my feet, and I wasn't "parking a car", I was just "parking". I wasn't "driving a car through a junction", I was "going through a junction". Somehow this helped me focus on the road more than the car and my body just sort of stopped panicking.

Keep at it, just keep at it, it will come together.

I passed September 2022, I done 64,
1 hour lessons and also practiced manurers and pulling up at the kerb every chance we could get childcare and practiced in a private car park. I watched my DH like a hawk when he was parking and asked both him and my instructor a thousand and one questions. My partner had been driving 13 years and answered everything and slowed down when parking so I could watch. Observe, ask alllll the questions, spend your mistakes on your lessons & practice. You’ll get there! I never thought I’d pass but perseverance is key. Good luck!

You've only had three lessons, give yourself a break!!

They say it usually takes the same number of hours as your age before you become reasonably competent, so if you are mid-30's that would be a minimum of 22 or 23 lessons of 1.5 hours. You have barely started and it takes a while to develop muscle memory and co-ordination.

It is a physical skill that takes time to master, so don't worry, you are doing fine.

I was shit and I mean, SHIT.
I must have had ten hours before I could go on "real roads"
I was learning in a manual and had about 45 hours in instructors car and double that in my own car.
Honestly never thought I'd ever pass and confidence was mainly holding me back.
I passed 7 years ago on second test with only 3 minors.
People do tell me how I'm a good, confident driver.
You don't really "learn" until you have passed your test.
Honestly, just try and have a bit more confidence in yourself.
X

My MIL parks about a foot away from the kerb every time.

It sounds to me that you are under confident and expecting to get things right first time or to be consistent quite quickly when it's a new skill and you're adding different bits and pieces each lesson. It'll come with time and practice.

Took me 2 years and 5 tries before I passed my test.

I know I'm not a great driver but I went at my own pace, kept at it and got there in the end. While I'm perfectly capable of driving from A to B, I try to avoid driving if I don't absolutely have to.

Mine had his third lesson this week and drove home along a 50 mile an hour winding country road (I was a bit shocked!). However if he's driving along a road with a pavement and pedestrians walk towards him then he tends to swerve away from them into the middle of the road and has the driving instructor screaming at him 😂. He went around a quietish estate on 'real' roads from day one of lessons but had practised with his dad on an industrial estate several times before.

I think you sound like you're doing fine OP, just taking it slowly and getting your confidence up. I think that's the difference between learning when you're young and learning when you're older - when you're young you don't overthink everything.

What are you doing in your lessons what does your instructor say? Meh I still sometimes misjudge the distance to the kerb. Not great but it happens

Gosh sounds like you're doing fine, it takes some people longer and a lot of it is confidence. At least a few months of regular lessons until you're likely to be ready to take the test I'd say. I passed my test 3rd time (not ready 1st time, unlucky 2nd!), but would say I'm a good safe driver now!

I know where the kerb is when I touch it with my wheels. My alloys are fucked 🤣

Thanks, I know I'm probably being impatient but I worried I was either useless or too slow.