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Neighbour replaced part of our fence!

61 replies

FrostyChristmas · 05/02/2024 20:41

Yesterday, DH and myself returned from a month abroad caring for a sick relative. We get on well with our elderly neighbour, they had our contact details, but heard nothing from them when away.
On returned, we saw 2 front/side fence panels had fallen over. DH went around today to remove the panels and advise that he was calling a fencing company to get it fixed ASAP.
Neighbour said they already had it sorted. DH reminded them that its OUR fence to replace, WE are responsible and would pay to fix/replace it. Whilst speaking- a fencing company arrived! Neighbour said we only needed to pay 1/4 of the price- IF we wanted to!
I was working and returned to find the front side fence replaced. Its better than before, but not exactly what I would have chosen.
I'm very jetlagged and wasn't involved in the conversation, but find it odd. Why would they pay for a fence that isn't theirs on the deeds? Why should I pay 1/4 for a fence I didn't choose? Am I missing something?

OP posts:
Whocanbelieveit · 05/02/2024 20:45

“I'm very jetlagged and wasn't involved in the conversation, but find it odd. Why would they pay for a fence that isn't theirs on the deeds? Why should I pay 1/4 for a fence I didn't choose? Am I missing something?” They sound very kind and helpful is what you are missing, pay 1/4 and thank your lucky stars that you have such nice neighbours.

vodkaredbullgirl · 05/02/2024 20:48

Take them a present round, if they won't accept money for the fence.

Got2getout · 05/02/2024 20:52

They’re happy to make the arrangements and pay for the fence because they want it fixed.

Not everyone can be afford / will prioritise new fence panels, so people that can afford / do want often sort it out so that the job gets done, even if it isn’t their responsibility.

Say thanks and be grateful there’s one less task on your to-do list.

Girlwithapple · 05/02/2024 20:54

As you get on well with your neighbour perhaps they were trying not to put anymore on your plate while they knew you were looking after a sick relative. Did they know when you were due back? We've had a lot of strong winds over the last few weeks, maybe they were worried about more panels coming down in the next lot.

MargaretThursday · 05/02/2024 20:55

What lovely neighbours!

I'd pay 1/4 or take a present round or probably both. How nice that they'll pay 3/4 the cost of something that you should have paid all, and they've organised it etc.

Spirallingdownwards · 05/02/2024 20:57

They wanted it fixed quicker than maybe you would. If you have been away for a month its probably been down a while . Do they have pets or grandkids they need the garden secure for.

If you want a different fence replace it but if it's OK think great it's only costing me 25% and say thanks.

StarTwirl · 05/02/2024 20:59

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DistinguishedSocialCommenator · 05/02/2024 21:01

Our next door wanted an old fence changed. They have lived there before we have. They wanted us to change it, the cheeky. My OH wnet upstaris and got the deeds and the paln of the bundaries etc and showed them that it was there fence, lol. Well we can lol now but we were a bit upset by their cheek trying it on - they are a bit older than us.

I wish I had your neibours!

MixingPlaydough · 05/02/2024 21:01

Why are you cross at them they sound like bloody fantastic neighbours!

Yes they didn't have to replace it but they did so anyway. They probably didn't want to bother you when you were already dealing with something so stressful and instead decided to be compassionate neighbours and just replace it.

Lifebeganat50 · 05/02/2024 21:02

Because some people are just nice people-it’s the kind of thing my dad would have done

Itslegitimatesalvage · 05/02/2024 21:04

That was very nice of them to sort that out, knowing that you two are going through a situation with your family member which they probably thought was upsetting, and long distance travel is enough of a pain without coming home to storm damage. Very kind of them to fix it.

FrostyChristmas · 05/02/2024 21:06

To clarify, I'm not annoyed with the the neighbour at all, just confused whether we should pay the entire amount or just 1/4?

As said, we get on very well. They knew when we were returning. Its 2 panels at the front of our properties to provide a boundary- so not keeping pets/grandchildren in.

OP posts:
Charlingspont · 05/02/2024 21:08

Very nice neighbours. Maybe insist on paying half?

Itslegitimatesalvage · 05/02/2024 21:10

In your OP, you were complaining about having to pay 1/4 for a fence you didn’t choose… then you got responses saying how nice the neighbours are and now you’re saying that of course you want to pay but is 1/4 enough.

TheDisgustingBrothers · 05/02/2024 23:05

FrostyChristmas · 05/02/2024 21:06

To clarify, I'm not annoyed with the the neighbour at all, just confused whether we should pay the entire amount or just 1/4?

As said, we get on very well. They knew when we were returning. Its 2 panels at the front of our properties to provide a boundary- so not keeping pets/grandchildren in.

To quote you Op: Why should I pay 1/4 for a fence I didn't choose?

emmaempenadas · 05/02/2024 23:21

Pay up

HelplessSoul · 06/02/2024 04:40

Nice neighbours or not, if they knowingly paid for the fence (irrespective of whether you like it or not), I wouldnt be paying them a penny.

More fool them for replacing something that you didnt ask for/or that belonged to them.

2024please · 06/02/2024 05:30

If the panels weren't what I would have chosen, I 'd have to change them!

chattyness · 06/02/2024 05:50

They're not what you'd choose but are they that awful to look at that you want to change them? If not then I'd probably offer at least half the cost if not the whole When our neighbours boundary fence came down in the high winds we went halves with them and we did the work ourselves because they were pensioners and we felt sorry for them really, plus we were both younger and working so we could afford it .

Pancakedayisthebest · 06/02/2024 06:23

You can look at it two ways.

1/ interfering neighbours pushing their taste on you. If so then don't pay up

2/ neighbours who probably got annoyed at no fence situation (we've had storms this month so you've probably missed that) and decide to replace at their own expense and take the burden off you sorting it so they didn't look naggy when you got back. If so pay up and say thank you for taking one bit of mental and physical load from your to do list.

Personally I'd go with option 2 because that's neighbourly and I'd prefer to have nice neighbour relations than live constantly fuming about fences.

Flottie · 06/02/2024 06:55

You’ve been away for a month. They probably got annoyed waiting. We had a neighbour who took their fence down when we were away, 3 months later and no fence we were getting annoyed and offered to go 50:50 even though it wasn’t our fence because we wanted our privacy back.
These neighbours sound lovely for paying for it, but I imagine it have been down a while and they were fed up.

Flottie · 06/02/2024 06:57

FrostyChristmas · 05/02/2024 21:06

To clarify, I'm not annoyed with the the neighbour at all, just confused whether we should pay the entire amount or just 1/4?

As said, we get on very well. They knew when we were returning. Its 2 panels at the front of our properties to provide a boundary- so not keeping pets/grandchildren in.

That’s not what you said in your original post… you seemed annoyed at having/being asked to pay for something you didn’t choose…

MixingPlaydough · 06/02/2024 06:59

2024please · 06/02/2024 05:30

If the panels weren't what I would have chosen, I 'd have to change them!

It's a fence, I honestly couldn't get so wound up about it that I'd consider having to change them. I find it baffling anyone would be so cross they were not the ones they would pick they would honestly fork out hundreds of pounds just because they didn't like them??

mindthespace · 06/02/2024 07:05

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Nice bit of low level racism first thing in the morning. Not sure what culture has to do with being precious about a fence panel.

Quitelikeacatslife · 06/02/2024 07:26

My older neighbour offered to replace the fence in full , but she wanted concrete posts and the good side facing her. What we have now is a bit shabby but I prefer the look of it and it matches all the way round . So I said no thanks.

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