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Want friends but don't at the same time

2 replies

namechange7458 · 01/02/2024 20:21

Even at school I never had a set friendship group. I have never had a best friend and was more like a floater friend drifting between groups. Now I'm married with DC but don't really have any friends.

I think my issue is I find friendship expectations really hard. I am an introvert and absolutely hate going anywhere where people are drinking and loud in particular. I always find I get on well with people then they start inviting me to things and I back off.

I recently started a walking/jogging club and got talking to a group. For me it was great and I enjoyed it as a weekly activity having a chat with a nice group of people . The next thing I'm on a WhatsApp group being invited to events. I went to one and I just felt so awkward. I haven't been to anything since and can tell they are becoming abit distant/ offish.

This happened afew times now I don't know whether I want friends or not. Is anyone else like this?

OP posts:
LittleRedRidingBoots · 01/02/2024 20:34

Me! I completely relate to this. I don't really have any close female friends and sometimes really wish I did, but like you, I always back off if I'm invited to something or somewhere that I don't feel entirely comfortable. I think it's a confidence thing for me. Also, my life is actually really busy and I've come to the conclusion that I just don't prioritise friendships...... which is probably quite sad 😞

JustWonderingIfImNormal · 01/02/2024 20:42

Me too! I’m exactly like this. I crave friends - then they appear in my life and I back off. I’ve had a few opportunities recently, but I’m almost like a commitment-phobe with friendships, I back off if they start getting close or I feel like there is an expectation of me. I really don’t know why. I long for friends, and was also a bit of a floating friend like you, or the friend that was never picked for bridesmaid type.I think I’ve been burned a few times by friends and it’s effected how I am.

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