Stupidest thing you've lost your shit over? Mine is spoons.

[IncompleteSenten]

Just now gone to get breakfast (I know it's quarter past 2, I was busy) and the ice cream sundae spoons and the serving spoons are in the same section of the cutlery tray as the table spoons. I had a mini tantrum to myself because this happens every. single. bloody. time. I put the spoons away properly - teaspoons in one section, tablespoons in one section, ice cream spoons in one section, serving spoons in ... you get the picture.
Yet whenever anyone else unloads the dishwasher, what do I later open the kitchen drawer to see?
Huge pile of assorted spoons in the tablespoon section.
If you can out trivial-shit me, I'll be surprised.

To save you all some time :D :D
Is this all I have to worry about?
No. I'm also deeply concerned about the beans being in the peas row of my tin cupboard and the loo roll getting hung 'over' instead of the right way, which is under.

Why don't I just do it myself if it bothers me so much?
Fuck off. :D there are 4 adults in this house and 3 of them are doing shit WRONG and I'm not rewarding them by turning into the housework fairy.

I've learned more about spoons the last half hour than in my entire life.

I never realised I had spoon envy until this thread. I only have dessert spoons, teaspoons, soup spoons, slotted serving spoons and salad spoons. I jealous of the sauce ladle above.

When I was a child I thought the epitome of sophistication was a canteen of cutlery as seen in those giant catalogues we had in the house; a wooden box lined in blue velvet. I have never owned one. FIL does and you can't dishwasher the fuckers to you have to hand wash and put them all back but they do look ever so lovely nestled in their little slots.

Is the uniform site Monkhouse? If it is, when you're ready to talk, I will join you in therapy.

I frequently have to take deep breaths when I find dirty dishes stacked on TOP of the dishwasher. Apparently no one else in this house can work out whether the dishwasher is empty or full and whether the dishes in it are dirty or clean. I even printed out a handy flow chart. Still nothing.

Oh, when the children hit 5 years old we did a family rock paper scissors to the death (metaphorical death although there were some minor injuries that day)

I won so I have made all family decisions since then.

My first decision was to ban the tradition of appointing household leader via rock paper scissors so now they have to wait until I die to change anything.

I'm not saying they're counting down until my heart gives out but equally, I'm not ruling it out.

When DD1 was due I planned my home birth and bought cook-from-frozen chocolate croissants. Birth didn’t go to plan, EMCS, trauma, blah blah. Finally came home a week later and wanted my chocolatine and to drop croissant crumbs on my newborn’s head as God and nature intended.

DP toddled off and microwave defrosted the fuckers, then immolated them in the oven instead of reading the very very simple instructions to cook them from frozen, which is EASIER. Presented me with a plate of inedible hockey puck things. I think I screamed louder than when they put me on the drip without an epidural. We lived minutes from a shop and it was all easily rectified… and yet.

These are brilliant. My period is due so I’m not saying that I’m being unreasonable, but my husband put raw potatoes into the air fryer for dinner tonight and not the ones I had part cooked in the microwave, which means there’s no time for them to cook for dinner before he goes to work and I can’t have my fully loaded jacket potato (sour cream, bacon, cheese and spring onions) and I almost cried.

Anyway we are having stir fry

I was pregnant and he had the audacity to breathe in my direction when I was trying to sleep. He was relocated to the spare room for a few months.

Ha! Dh chucks the washing up cloth on the draining board (he - incorrectly - prefers to uses a shitty little sponge scourer for everything). I want him to hang it over the tap...

Solidarity with the 'toilet roll goes under' crew. <ducks>

Yeah, what is this 'toilet roll goes over' business? weirdos.

Mine was a Tesco self-service till which invited me to put my bag in the bagging area. It then spake thus: 'Unexpected item in the bagging area'.

I said rather too loudly: "IT'S A BAG, YOU STUPID GIT!!!"

The loo roll goes over. This is non-negotiable.

I also find most of the domestic scenarios outlined here teeth-gnashingly irritating. Strangely however my blood pressure is on the low side.

I am profoundly pleased with my newly acquired set of long handled teaspoons.

I probably get most annoyed with ds's inability to correctly pitch the volume of his voice. He YELLS and SCREECHES when he is two feet away from me yet mumbles and mutters when he is in a different room and I am in the kitchen with the extractor and airfryer going.

I must have said "Stop shouting" or "I can't hear you" hundreds of thousands of times. It makes zero impression on him.

Toilet roll goes OVER if holder is affixed to a wall. No fingermarks on wall then, see.

I hear you, sister

I had a massive tantrum that the Christmas tree that DH and DS bought was too big. Hid in my room and cried. Following year bought artificial tree.

I unashamedly have whole conversations with tills in Tesco. It's not an unexpected item, it's the thing I just fucking scanned you twat. Yes I will remember to take my bag of shopping with me, funnily enough it's the only pissing reason I'm in here.

Your spoons are looking the most attractive, in this spoon, top of the pops drawer thingy madness

This is joyous. 😂😂😂

😂😂😂😂

I LOVE this post!

When you are on a water meter and you are having a wee one after the other, it makes complete financial sense.

Love this! Sounds completely reasonable 😆

Ahem

The RIGHT way to hang loo roll😋

No.

They invented it wrong.

🤣🤣

Forty years ago DM was baking. She separated four eggs and used the yolks then left the whites in a brightly coloured bowl on the side, to use later. DB was washing up, failed to notice the whites in the bowl and washed it up.

DM was SOOOO annoyed! She still brings it up occasionally.