Would you let your 9 year old to the park alone

[Mickeyfish]

Just wondering if im in the wrong here
My dd was invited to the park with just her friend earlier today both are late 9's
The park isn't far but isn't at all within my eyesight or the other parents I said no because I'm not comfortable with it, she doesn't have a phone yet so isn't able to contact me also
This park can be awful at times especially on a weekend it was about 3pm (as weve been there with the dogs and there's all sorts of people around)
Dd of course went into a right mardy about it . My dh is in the same thought process at me

Mine started going to the park with friends in year 6, aged 11. The park is very safe. I've never seen anyone dodgy looking there.

I wouldn't have been comfortable with it when DC were 9. They have a cousin who has been allowed to wander around on his own since he was about 7. When we visited SIL I would get an eye roll because I insisted on either DP or me accompanying the kids to the park. She was very defensive about it, but I wasn't judging her. I just preferred not to let my DS go with his cousin to the park unsupervised. She lives in a village where everyone knows each other. But I don't know them, so ...

No. You and your husband are right in your instincts.

Absolutely not. I live in an apparently nice suburban area with a nice leafy green park which lots of school parents think is perfectly safe (“things like that don’t happen around here”) - but I know from various police and social services contacts that it’s got a serious issue with teens recruiting for county lines and taking drugs. No way would my children be allowed to hang around there without an adult, especially at dusk. I’d let them walk purposefully to school and back alone, but not just hang around in parks.

Not a chance.

Really depends on what kind of area you live in and the maturity of your child. I would let one of my kids go to the park where I live alone with a friend at 9. It's a quiet area and no dangerous roads to cross. My daughter though not a chance she's away with the fairies and too trusting of people.

Nope. The possibility of awful people being about or bullying kids, large out of control dogs etc.

Yes my kids have been going to the park round the corner since they were 7.

But I live in Scotland we're going out to play is quite normal.

From what you've said, no.

DD 8yrs is allowed to the local park, sometimes with friends but also alone (it's 5 mins away, no roads). She also walks our dog by herself, often to the middle school she will be going to in September (and she will have to go by herself then anyway). We have safety chats and have built up to this, it's all about trust, if she breaks that she looses all the freedom privileges. I'm lucky with her personality though, she's very sensible and we live in a very boring place

i did, but the local park is quite safe, a couple of others do have the teens making trouble, and we know a lot of neighbours with houses overlooking the park, so DD knew to go them if there was any trouble
i did “shadow her” the first couple of times, and gave her clear boundaries
in all fairness it was in between lockdowns, so it was her only chance of being a kid and having some “normality”

No, I wouldn't. There are dealers at the ping-pong tables, public drinkers in the gazebo, flooding in speakers corner, occasional thugs with dogs, and a general free for all in the MUGA. I supervise from a discreet distance.

My 9 year old is 10 in a couple of months and I'm fine with him walking to the park at the end of our road with a friend and then I follow on about 10 mins later. I will slowly increase the time as he gets older. The park near us is a nice one though, the park we used to live near is full of drug addicts and we were always coming across used needles in the playground - they'll be married with kids of their own before I let them hang out there without me 😂.

I will also say that when my son was a toddler and we spent a lot of time in the playground and at the park, I got to know the older children (as in 7-10) who were allowed to go there to play unsupervised. They were nice kids but it was 100% clear that they would be getting into trouble in the near future. In the same way, I know which of the children in my son's year are allowed out on their own - anyone who lives around here will know them and see that they are on the loose. I have to say I wouldn't like my son to be visibly vulnerable in that way - it is like watching chicks who have hopped out of the nest a bit early.

And I grew up with much more freedom in an area with swarms of free range children blowing up walls with German bangers. It just seems more risky when most people don't do it, and most families around here are strict, for good reason.

I did, and would again. I don’t even live in the nicest of areas, but it was middle of the day, and she was always with friends.

like the other poster, I live in Scotland and it seems common place up here.

I think you know the area etc best, but at some point you need to start getting them used to independence etc, in a way that works for you. It’s an individual circumstances thing I think.

Nope

I did from around 8/9. There was a group off them went together. Was around 10 minutes walk away, they'd go for a couple of hours then come home to check in.
I realise I'm in the minority though.

Very common at 9 round here. We started with going for short periods and built up to longer ones.
However if your local park has "all sorts of people around" at 3pm on a weekend, the decision is different. Our local park is filled with families, dog walkers, joggers and cyclists.

No I wouldn’t.

Summer term of Yr5 lots were playing out without supervision for DDs year group.

Wouldn't even entertain the idea. But I'm not massively keen on my very sensible yr8 12 year old doing it tbh and my 9 year old is much less streetwise.
The mobile phone thing is some comfort but given the regular mugging for mobile phones reported in the press (not aware of it being a specific issue locally) generally I don't really want her walking around with it out anyway.

We have a park around the corner, I think DC started going there alone sometimes at 10 - they were pretty confident and mature, and they were walking a mile to school every weekday, so it seemed fair enough. They would go and rollerskate/cycle or sometimes go to playground.

It would depend on the individual child and how mature and world wise they were. It would also then depend on where the park was, what type of people frequent it, who they are going with etc ...

Our girl walked home from Year 4, which her school encouraged for kids that age. She had to walk through the park to get home. As she had a phone, I'd let her go, as long as she said who she was with and to answer quickly.

It's less than 10 minutes from our hose. At the beginning, I'd go out with the dog and do a bit of discreet watching from a distance. After school, it's always full of kids and parents.

9 is too young in my opinion. They do not have the means to deal with a stressful situation, for example one falling out & bumping their head, something being stolen from them etc