Can anyone say anything to help me alleviate my totally fear of antidepressants - could they possibly turn my life around?

[Fairytoast]

Although I have suffered from anxiety all of my life I’ve always turned down the offer of antidepressants as I fear them greatly. Over the years I have tried (literally) all alternatives and have spent a small fortune on therapy, supplements, alternative therapies etc but very little has had a massive or long lasting impact.

I have reached a point in my life (well, if I’m honest it’s been the last 6 years - they have been hell) where I am completely and utterly consumed by this anxiety (and if I’m honest, depression too). It’s on a day to day basis and the only relief from it is sleep.

I have terrible health anxiety along side all of this which is probably my main reason for shying away from AD’s, any slight side effect sends me into a frenzy.

The other huge issue that I have is my daily gut problems (25+ years diagnosis of IBS). These digestive problems control my life. I can not emphasise enough just how controlling these gut issues are for me (mentally and physically). Again, I have tried everything available to ease this but my gut/brain connection is strong and I am starting to believe only antidepressants can break this but I am petrified they will upset my stomach even further, especially as the main side effects of AD’s appear to be diarrhoea of which I have a huge phobia over.

Can anyone help ease these fears, have you taken antidepressants and they have made you life better? I really don’t want to go into the later years of my life continuing to be consumed and controlled by my mind and body. I help care for my dm who suffers from Alzheimer’s and I need to be strong for that and atm I am not.

They've completely changed my life when it comes to anxiety. You have to mentally accept the first three weeks will be a bit weird but honestly I wouldn't be without them.

I take Sertraline, 100mg every morning, and quite honestly without antidepressants I would have been dead years ago. I don't have anxiety but I had crushing depression from my early teens- parents were very against any kind of medication for me and I went without until my 30s.
If I'd taken them sooner my whole life would have been much, much different.

I'm not a zombie, I'm not numb, I'm not sedated. I'm just me but "human" and able to have an actual life.

I took Citalopram first and that gave me bad diarrhoea but I've never had any side effects from Sertraline.

the main side effects of AD’s appear to be diarrhoeah

Also I've never experienced this. Main side effects for me were brain zaps which are harmless.

Long-term user of them here. There are so many brands/types, you try one and if it doesn't work then back to the GP to try another.

You'll soon work out how it suits you to take them. Mine, I don't take on an empty stomach as I'll feel sick, and I can't take them at night as they give me insomnia. As long as I stick to those 'rules', they work great. I can't function without them, and that's ok - I wouldn't not take (e.g.) diabetes meds just cos I was scared of potential side-effects.

They have been a game changer for my DD.

They can transform your life. When they bring down the anxiety, it also helps with gut issues as anxiety definitely exacerbates them!

May also be worth considering if you're neurodivergent, as this is the cause of my life long anxiety. ADHD meds have helped enormously with that.

They completely changed my life - My anxiety was perimenopause related. I take a combination of Fluoxetine 20mg and HRT and I can now function. My anxiety was so bad at times I could not leave the house or drive my car. This has all gone. I do sometimes get "normally" anxious about some things sometimes but the totally consuming rocking on the sofa anxiety has gone. Like you, I was very wary of taking them previously but I kind of had little choice as I didn't want to continue living like that.

The side effects are mostly short lived, so you would only need to get through a couple of weeks of discomfort. I've been on several different ADs in the past. In the end I decided they weren't for me for various reasons but I think they probably would be useful in your circumstances.

OP, I was totally against taking ADs and resisted for a long time. I thought I'd never take them in my life. In the end, with perimenopausal anxiety being what it was and some difficult life events at the same time, I decided to try them for a year. They got me back on track and turned everything around for the better. I've been off them for two years now but would take them again if in the same spot. It doesn't have to be forever.

It did take a bit of willpower to get over the first two to three weeks where they did have side effects, but my threshold for wanting to give up was pretty low, so it took more determination to stick with it. Then one day all side effects (that weren't that severe) disappeared. I started with half a usual starting dose (as discussed with my doctor) and that helped. I never had to get higher than the usual starting dose as I was very responsive to them.

I was very anti taking them but I got to a point where I needed help and that decision turned my life around. Like others have said the initial period was hard but you will notice a difference.

How would you feel if you were taking medication for say high blood pressure? Would you just feel they were a necessary medication to keep you well and if you would, what is the difference between them and ADs?

You have to take care of yourself, and sometimes we all may need help with that.

I am under a psychiatrist at a London neuro-gastro department for my gut issues. I had an appointment with him this week. We talked about possible neuro-diversity issues so he did the quick test for me and suggested that I should seek a diagnosis, he is writing to my GP but I believe the waiting list is long in my area but at least it has started the ball rolling I guess.

I was going to say changing my diet to include a lot of fresh fruit, veg and whole grains really improved my mental state and lowered my anxiety much better than medications I had tried but as you have IBS that might not be ideal for you so I would suggest you do try medication.

I think it's important to remember that this is a totally reversible decision.

It's not like you're deciding whether to have your leg cut off or something. If you don't get on with antidepressants, then you can just stop taking them. Or try different ones. Even allowing for a decent length of time for a trial period, you're only talking about a few months of giving it a go. As against at least 6 years of "utter hell" which you have suffered without them.

Honestly, in the nicest possible way, you are really being irrational about this. Are you doing any talking therapy? Maybe your therapist can help you talk through your feelings about medication. It does sound as if you need help on that issue if you really can't face even trying antidepressants out.

Badburyrings this anxiety has definitely reached a whole new level since hitting perimenopause, I’ve really struggled to control it. My rescue dog has been on Fluoxetine for the last few months and he’s doing really well on it, maybe I should give it a go too? I have to put hrt on hold atm as I was recently diagnosed with endometriosis and need to talk to the endo team first.

NotMarriedToAHouse I am just so worried the side effects (especially if they are gut related) will have an impact on my working life, I am a self employed PA for a disabled person and just can not take time off and the thought of being poorly at work stresses me but I suppose I need to get over that fear, somehow.

FiveShelties tbh I am desperate to take something to help but it’s the absolute fear of the side effects stoping me. If I were at home all day I could probably cope but I work in people’s homes and being unwell at work would be a nightmare for me.

I had PND which led to psychosis.
It was the worst time in my life and I wish I reached out for help sooner.

ADs won’t dramatically change your life but they’ll just help you be in a position to help yourself more.

They are there to simply replace the chemicals that you are currently lacking.

Why not try them for 6 months and then decide whether you want to continue or not.

Write down how you are feeling before you start taking them and then read it again in 6 months time to see what affect they’ve had.
I know that I didn’t realise how much better I had become because I still had some depression/anxiety but then I found a document describing how I felt etc and I was shocked by how far I had come.

Things won’t happen overnight, especially because you start off with such a low dose.

I've used several anti depressants in my life. I had some side effects initially with fluoexitine and too many with mirtazipine. Duloxetine saved my life.

I've gone from living in a continual state of panic attack to feeling calm 90% of the time.

I also have IBD so well acquainted with the mind-gut connection. Never had any gut side effects from various anti depressants.

Try them., don't be scared of them. They could change your life & stop you living in fear.

(Also, have you ever been investigated for IBD?)

pukkapud I follow a very plain and boring low fodmap diet, it’s quite healthy with mostly fresh food.

Bandwaggon I totally agree with you, I am being very irrational but this part of my brain which overthinks and lives in fear takes over. I’ve had endless CBT to try to resolve this but have failed tbh, my irrational brain has always taken over and controlled me. I am currently on a waiting list for acceptance therapy, it should start in the Spring.

I have Amitriptyline. I tried the most popular AD's but just didn't get on with them at all so Dr switched me to Ami and the difference and outcome has been amazing.

Thank you. I will try that, I do already keep a symptoms diary, hopefully I can look back in a few months and see a positive change.
I really just want to be able to cope on a day to day basis.

Sorry, to add- this is primarily for major anxiety issues.

StBrides that’s so good to hear, especially as you have gut issues. I have had endless gastro tests including 2 colonscopies but all put down to IBS and SIBO.

CourtenayDevon I did try Nortriptyline for my IBS but it made me feel like a zombie, maybe Amitriptyline would be better suited?

It's incredible that there's still such resistance to antidepressants. If you had a heart issue you wouldn't refuse medication, would you? This is no different.

They will massively help with your anxiety and gut issues. Give it a try and if you're really not happy you can try a different one or come off all together. You're not committing to taking them for life.

@Fairytoast I actually was diagnosed with IBS myself years ago and did the Foodmap, diet, I agree that it is healthy but it is quite restrictive and cuts out a lot of things I now find to be critical for my wellbeing like Legumes and a lot of green veg. As it turns out in my case it was my anxiety causing my IBS symptoms and correcting that with diet improved both. However everyone is different.