Have baby showers gone out of control?

[BrandySnaps1]

attended one recently. not only was there a shower for the mum, there was a separate gender reveal and then another party when the baby was born. The baby shower was like something out of a reality tv show.

Doesnt it feel like its all becoming a spectacle and out of control?

Gender reveal parties and baby showers are a bit naff. Been invited but never attended. I’d rather wait until the baby is here to celebrate.

Tempting fate. Sadly things do go wrong in pregnancy.

I've been to one in a pub with some games which I didn't enjoy and one where we met for afternoon tea which was actually a real nice excuse to all get together before the baby was born.

However considering I have an awful lot of friends with kids and have only ever been invited to 2 I don't think they are all that common.

It would be devastating either way (if you’d had a baby shower or not had one) so I dont think this should be a reason not to celebrate.

I was invited to one. I declined politely whilst thinking’ I would rather have my head set in concrete’ Self important, instagram tacky rubbish

But why do we have weddings if not to celebrate a huge event in someone's life? People spend tens of thousands and that's normal. Arguably having a baby is an even bigger life event....

Not for me personally but I'm unsure why people are so upset at others choosing to celebrate

I think they’re lovely but I’ve never been to one that I’d consider tacky. I’m not superstitious so I don’t think it’s tempting fate. I see it as a way of showing support and celebrating.

So...there was still just the one baby shower then? The other 2 things are separate and not baby showers

If your baby dies, it's excruciating and horrific. But there are no birthday parties, no milestones, nothing but grief and loss. People don't mention your baby or talk about them.

Having a party to celebrate their existence before they were earth side didn't, and can't, make them die.

Baby showers are something that I hope everyone will decline attending, even if for spurious reasons. They will not get out of control if people start to boycott them.

Yes. Same goes for bridal showers, too. Shallow, American rubbish. Either graspy for more presents, or vanity, for Instagram & Facebook likes.

I think it depends on the party itself. You can go OTT and it looks a bit tack but that’s down to the person who’s organised it.

For mine we did hire a small venue only to save having to clean and cook ourselves, but it was lovely having my mum and female relatives there - all sharing stories about babies and childbirth , plus my friends too and their little ones. For me it was nice to get dressed up when I felt a bit meh, it’s lovely to see how many people love your baby before it’s even born.

Certainly not widespread though.

Hate them and hate gender reveals it’s just this social media culture that has made these into massive things. I had neither for both of my pregnancies sisters wanted to do a baby show and I said no.

Or for.... fun?

It’s like trick and treating, which seems lovely in the US,
but doesnt work as
well when Brits get our hands on it.

I had a surprise one. A few silly games (how fast can you dress the dolly), and a lovely spread of food, in someone's home. It was a lovely way to spend some time with friends before it got hectic. I was bought some nice gifts and an invaluable box of baby essentials with all the post labour recovery, baby medicine and creams I might need at 2am when the shops were shut. It was fun, affordable and a special memory.

Yes I agree. I’m not very keen on collections for expectant mums going on may leave at work for the same reasons (though having once voiced my concern I was looked at like I was mad so I just keep quiet now)

Thank god my kids came along before all this nonsense, gender reveals, baby showers. Even if they had been a thing I had no money to waste anyway
I've been to a couple of baby showers, pleasant enough with prosecco and nibbles and a few silly games, whatever floats your boat I guess, but everything people do nowadays seems to be for social media. Life was so much simpler and nicer before SM was invented

but wouldnt it be worse having a big celebration, all these memories and then it doesnt work out? Would much rather celebrate after with a healthy baby

You mean chavs don’t you?

Brits do manage to make a mess of nice American traditions.

The other thing is that Americans don’t have a “greedy” “grabby” mindset. It’s not part of our culture to think in those terms.

People should just stop attending.

Everyone loves attention. So some will seek out centre of attention in many ways. And being pregnant can be boring, so I understand why people want a bit of a fuss.

Saying that, a bit of a fuss does not equal a "gender reveal" party. I had no interest in finding out the gender of either of our babies I sure don't give two shakes of a lamb's tail anyone else's baby gender.

All going well it will be a healthy baby. And that should be all that matters.

They're not for me personally, but I don't see the issue with people wanting to celebrate a wonderful time in their lives!