Birthday day off school.

[Helpmeout124]

I know this will be controversial but I'm allowing my son to have 1 day off school to take him to London for his birthday, usually he goes to school on his birthday and will again next year but he's been having a really hard time at school lately, lots of friendship issues and coming home upset. And to be completely honest I just feel like he needs this. He needs a day where the 3 of us myself, him and his stepdad get away and just have a day that's all about him. We're going to London on the train first thing, we wants to go both museums, see the sights of London, go shopping at hamleys, and then I've booked tickets to see the lion king at the theatre in the evening, it's going to be a fantastic day and hopefully one he will always remember, but I feel a little guilty for booking it on his actual birthday ( a Wednesday) and not waiting for the weekend.

It's fine. The only mistake you've made it posting on Mumsnet.
People will argue you've scuppered his chances of getting in to a good university and set him up for failure for the rest of his life - not to mention the impact on his teacher and the rest of the class.

Meanwhile in the real world it's just one day and sounds like he needs it. Enjoy the day!

It sounds like a lovely day out. I’m not sure I would take my DD out of school on her birthday for a day out but given the context of what your son is experiencing he will feel very special and loved.

Sorry to read he’s having a tough time atm, I hope the school are doing something to address it

I had nearly every birthday off school without even having been bullied to ‘justify’ it, and have since worked in various companies who give you the day off too (and I book it as annual leave if they don’t- it’s my birthday!!) - please do set the precedent for your son, he matters more than the attendance nonsense.

(and the natural history museum is awesome, hope you all have a lovely day!)

My 8 year old has an optional school trip to London to do much the same stuff that you are suggesting. That is in school hours and deemed educational so I'm not sure I'd be that bothered about it.

Hope you have a lovely day!

I think this will be lovely for him given the hard time he's going through at school. Have a great day, it sounds so good!

To you it might not be a crime but truancy is actually a crime.

sounds awful what he’s going through at school and I do hope it will get sorted for him but trips like this should be planned for a weekend regardless of whether it’s for a birthday or not

I can't see the harm in these circumstances.

I was going to post differently initially, based on workplace scenarios. When people routinely take days off for mental health reasons related to underlying issues such as problems with colleagues or workload (rather than depression for example) it backfires. Often they are perceived as flaky and overlooked and the problem gets worse. By protecting themselves with a day off they're actually sealing their own fate. Far better to address the underlying issue.

The same thing applies to your DS in that he can't run away from these problems (unless you take him out of school completely or change schools). He needs some coping strategies and as his mum you need to create a stink to get the school to address it.

However, the day of his birthday is not the day to make this point, so enjoy the day and make him feel special.

Go at the weekend.

Ooh sounds like a fabulous day you’ve planned for him! Hope he has an amazing time, you’ve done nothing wrong. Ignore the negative comments, people are just jealous!

I'd take him, it's a one off special occasion. Go and have a lovely day especially as he's been having a rough time

I was going to say I wouldn’t take my child out of their school for their birthday ( I have one with a birthday in the summer hols and one with a term time birthday who always goes in) but after hearing how down your son is and with him only being 8, I think it sounds like a lovely day and the boost he needs.

You are exactly the kind of parent that should be fined tbh. Having a hard time does not mean you should celebrate your birthday on a school day. If you want to treat him you could go for a meal out or the cinema after school. You will no doubt deny it but I am betting his attendance is on the low end. You are also sending the message that if things are a bit hard take a day off. You are setting him a rubbish example. You should feel guilty.

Sounds amazing .Hope he has a fantastic time!

I can only laugh at this comment 😂 if coming home in floods of tears most days is "having a bit of a hard time" then ok 😊

OP, just make it clear that it's an exceptional treat, not something can be done every year. Then go and have a blast. Memories are very important. One day missed aren't.

Oh yeah he definetly dosnt get this kind of thing every year, last year he was at school on his birthday and we went to ninja warrior at the weekend.

Was there a point in posting since you intend on already going? Unless you were wanting lots of people telling you to go and have a lovely time to reassure you about your decision?

I don't have children- but if I did I would most certainly be taking them out of school for one day to do something nice with them!
(Obviously if it was during a crucial time such as exams etc then no)
People are so bloody judgy on here. 1 day isn't going to ruin a child's education or make them grow up to think they can take days off work whenever they want as adults. "What kind of precedent are you setting"?? - jeez, get a life people.
It's 1 day. Have fun!

What do you mean by sacred day? It's a day out for his birthday, loads of people do it. I remember loads of kids having their birthday off when I was at school. I would also hope multiplication is more than I've days learning also. There's plenty of reasons kids have a day off, doesn't mean they have doomed the rest of their education

He's had some mental health councilling (basically learning strategies to cope with big feelings) he had 8 sessions, but unfortunately the bullying continues.

I've spoken to the teachers on every occasion they must be sick to the back teeth of me, but only when I said I was going to move him to a new school did they refer him for the sessions.

Good for you op, I hope you all have an amazing time and I hope your son has a fab birthday treat.

Yes, I understand he can use councilling. But the bullying needs to stop, what is school doing about this?

And although I understand the people who say you need to plan this for the weekend, I am left wondering how much the bullying influences his learning...