Autism? Or something else so grateful for any advice

[troppibambini6]

Hi was hoping someone might have some experience or advice about my son who's 10.

He's always been a bit quirky but over the last few years things have ramped up a bit and I'm now not sure if things might need investigating a bit further or I need to somehow put some extra support in place for him.

I totally understand that people on the internet can't diagnose him but maybe someone might recognise his behaviour or have any advice about my next steps as I have no experience with this.

Things got bad after covid we lost three family members and a beloved pet very close together which resulted in ds having very bad separation anxiety. He couldn't sleep as didn't want to be alone, refused school and neither me or dh could leave the house (especially at night) as he was scared we wouldn't come back.

We got him counselling and after a few months he was much better and said he wanted to stop as he didn't need it anymore.

He is super bright especially as maths
He can build things without instructions so quickly
Still had anxiety dwells on everything
Strong sense of injustice and will lash out if provoked
Loves facts and obsesses in subject and learns everything
OCD tendencies which are getting worse washing hands, checking taps, has to say certain things in order before bed.
Worries about tiny things which then seem to consume him.
Is very emotional and cries a lot

Sorry it's so long... what next does he need some kind of assessment? If he does for what? More counselling?

I feel lost.

That doesn't specifically point to autism. But yes, he needs more support re the anxiety/intrusive thoughts/OCD.

www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/zero-six/202202/10-traits-highly-sensitive-children?amp

@Flatpackedboxes thank you. Yes you're right I think maybe some more counselling.

Last time he had counselling (he was 8) they wouldn't share anything with me because of patient confidentiality which I found a bit odd as I was hoping to work as a team to help and put some coping strategies in place for him.

www.littleotterhealth.com/blog/highly-sensitive-child?format=amp

@MillicentRogers wow ds has a lot of those traits. It could almost have been written about him.

I will read up on that. If we are wanted to get him some support to help him with working through the feelings and trying to manage any compulsions would counselling be the best bet?

Apart from the OCD this sounds like my DS11. His major issue was boredom at school so we had him assessed by https://potentialplusuk.org/ and found he was on the 99.6th percentile for maths so classed as having high learning potential (HLP). Knew he was good, but not that good. Lots of helpful information on the website and they did also identify sensory issues which I was unaware of with possible ADHD.

In a similar situation we took our son to see a child psychologist privately (cost about £250) and she spoke to him and us, took a history and did some screening questions (for social communication, anxiety and a couple of other things) and then wrote a very thorough report for us.
Basically we were unsure if it was autism or something else and she was able to tell us whether it was worth pursuing a diagnosis.

Child or family psychiatrist sounds a great idea.

A lot of the symptoms you've listed are present in my youngest son (7). He's awaiting ADHD assessment and has school support and input from the Ed Psych at school. FWIW I pursued this after I was diagnosed with ADHD three years ago and things started clicking into place.

However, in your DS it may be side effects of extreme anxiety so psychology assessment I think is a good way to start (private if you can afford it).