What time do your children go to bed?

[Noed]

My DM is very pushy when it comes to my children, she is always criticising my parenting and she is adamant that I am in the wrong here so opinions would be great thank you.

I have a 12 year old and a 10 year old who currently go to bed at 9pm on a school night and 11pm at the weekends, they are doing well at school and do not seem tired during the day however my DM keeps on at me about how it is too late of a bedtime.

So I would like to hear others opinions on this as she goes on and on until I keep questioning whether I am in the wrong.

Thank you.

15 and 12 and around 9.30ish upstaies here aiming to be in bed by 10pm

Scouts finishes 9, explorers 9.30 midweek.... sport finishes 9!

But I'm aware when I had a 12 and 9 year old we did earlier... so second child is getting a better deal.

12, 11 and 6

10pm on a school night for the older two (9:30 in bed reading) 8pm for the 6yo.

11pm at the weekend for the older two and 9pm for the 6yo. They all sleep in and sleep well so it works for us.

A reminder that if it work for you and your DC then don't worry about what your DM or anyone on this thread thinks.

6:45? Wowsers. Sometimes we haven't had dinner til 6pm and clubs aren't finished till 6/6:30.

6:45!? Can i ask what time they get in from school etc?

Do you work?

No judgement, i'd like my 5 year old to do 7:30pm but its often later. I work from home but finish approx 5-5:30. Just don't think it's enough time to do dinner, homework, chat

My 10 Yr olds swimming lesson starts at 6.15 finishes at 6.45 and can't be earlier as that's when Lanes lessons are. So the 5yr old does the 5.45-6.15 lesson.
6.45 is insane, how does anyone eat dinner / do scouts / music lessons / swimming?

Dts are y8. On non activity week nights they go up by 845, read and lights out by 915. They get up at 6am.

Friday / Saturday it's more like nights out by 10.

5 year old DT’s. Aim to be in bed around 8/8.30. But they often don’t sleep until at least 9.30/10. Awake around 7.30. They’ve never been great sleepers and it’s always taken them hours to go to sleep. It’s nice in the summer as we can be out until dark and they aren’t tired! I guess everyone is different and as long as your dc aren’t over tired then their bedtime is fine.

Ds12 bedtimes are 10.30pm school nights and midnight on weekends.

4yo, between 7:30-8. Always been pretty strict with bedtimes unless exceptional circumstances

My 7 yr old goes to bed at 8pm (falls asleep by 8.30pm), and my 13 yr old goes to bed at 9pm (and falls asleep by 9.30/10pm). Both children get up at 7am. On weekends the 7 yr old goes to bed at 8pm still. The 13 yr old stays up until about 10.30/11pm on the weekend

Dd11 goes to bed 9.00pm on a school night and 10/10.30 on the weekend
ds16 has asd and is all about routine. He goes to his bed at dead on 10pm every night but I suspect he doesn’t go to sleep until much later.

Same here- 9 year old goes for quick shower at 7:30, then reading/drawing until 8:30 ish.

One weekend night a week he doesn’t go to sleep til’ 10.

Thank you for your replies.

They get up at 7am on weekdays and can sleep in between 9-10am on weekends.

It's been really informative reading and helpful.

Weekdays - upstairs, getting ready for bed at 8.15, shower, read/audiobook etc… lights out around 9pm, asleep by about 9.30.

Weekends - 10pm. Later than I would like but DD 10 doesn’t seem to need loads of sleep. When she tries to go to bed earlier, she struggles to sleep so…

11 & 12 y old have had their 9.15/9.45 bed time and then half an hour of reading or playing time upstairs before lights off (an hour at weekends) for a few years.

Re. your mother - they're your kids so do what you feel is right. There is a lot of info about how much sleep children should get but ultimately you can't force them to drop off unless hammers are involved so as long as they don't seem tired or lacking during the day, it's fine. Tell her to mind her own business and stop telling her stuff.

@forgotname yes I work full time, they go to wraparound some days but they are terrible the next day with late nights (have a 7 year old that does similar just lights out a bit earlier), they get up at 630 week days and no matter what time they go to bed at the weekend it's up at 630 and then they are irritable. Better all round if they stick to what's best for them.

It's not insane. It's what my children need to get enough sleep and function the next day. They still do beavers, scouts, swimming, climbing etc. the 10 yr old has a late night on Thursday for scouts but that's a recent change and she's proper grumpy and tired on a Friday.

I think this is VERY much child dependent, one of my four was never a sleeper, she is now 14 and I allow her to choose her own bedtime, she is responsible and will sleep when she's tired. You cannot force people to sleep if they're not tired.
If your children are not showing signs of tiredness and are functioning well, why would you change their bedtime?

In the nights he doesn't have activities, my 11 year old (Y6) goes up at 8-8.15 and light goes out at 9. He's up until 9 at the latest on weekends. He does however go to scouts midweek which doesn't finish until 9, so it's often nearer 10 before he goes bed that evening.

8, nearly 9 year old goes up about 8 and light out 8.30ish. He would go earlier, and his big brother did, but we're often not home much earlier due to older one's activities.