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Finding the middle ground

5 replies

Globules · 07/01/2024 17:36

I love my bestie. She has ME, and associated issues that go with that.

Today we were in a place where children were screaming in their play. It wasn't right or wrong that the children were screaming. It was a majority adult space they were screaming in. There was a child space that could go to, but it's not essential they go there.

I am able to filter the screaming out. Due to her ME, my best friend wasn't able to filter it out. Every scream was causing her physical pain. She was cross that the parents were doing nothing to modify their play and screaming.

From her perspective the parents should be stopping the children screaming as it was not necessary. She cited that when my children were little, I would have stopped them screaming. She's right that I would have done, but I told her I've accepted through the years that everyone parents differently and these parents don't see there's a problem with the screaming. Me and my parenting doesn't judge others in their parenting.

I understand that they were causing her pain.
I understand that children were being children too.

I couldn't agree with her that the children's screaming was a problem. She found it difficult that I didn't agree with her.

I told her that if she had an issue, she needed to talk to the parents and help them understand her issues. She didn't do so. I offered to do it on her behalf. She wouldn't let me.

I wasn't sure what to do in this situation. I had no problem with the children being children. She did. She found it difficult I wouldn't agree with her.

Where do you find the balance between children and adults accessing the same space?

OP posts:
aSwarmOfMidgies · 07/01/2024 17:51

Concert going earplugs might help in future

Remind her you can't change other people only yourself

JellyMouldJnr · 07/01/2024 17:55

i am more on her side. I don’t it is appropriate for kids to be screaming in a public space with adults and children.

Globules · 07/01/2024 19:05

She already has Loops.

She took them out to talk to me and another friend, which meant she was more exposed to the child screaming.

OP posts:

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xyz111 · 07/01/2024 19:12

I totally agree with her. There's no reason for kids to be screaming. It's annoying!

SD1978 · 07/01/2024 19:34

Kids screaming in an adult mainly area is rude. I don't believe that the needs of children come first at all times and in all spaces. There should be basic common decency in non child centric places that noise is kept to a reasonable level. I'm with your friend on this one. If I'm in a soft play, park, etc, then I am ok with it, but when trying to have a conversation if other people are doing nothing to modify their kids volume I find it pretty hard

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