Could you hurt your DP or others?

[Vynn]

I’m not sure if this is the right forum to discuss this in, so apologies if this causes offence. It is a bit embarrassing. DH has asked me to do things that I am uncomfortable with for several reasons.
In short he asked to have pain or discomfort inflicted upon himself and I am really not sure if I can do this. He explained why and it makes little sense to me, but I suppose I might be very
removed from this mindset.
I know that this is probably fairly standard for many couples but I am really struggling with the idea of hurting someone for whatever reason. Secondly I’m concerned because I know that he did self harm in the past (a long time ago before we met) and I wouldn’t want to enable destructive behaviour.

I just wanted to check if I’m the only one who struggles with the idea or if there are others who this has worked for despite reservations? There is no way I’ll be discussing this with my friends.

A light slap on the bum during sex is probably the furthest I would go.

If he happened to have pissed me off? I would happily inflict as much pain as he wanted. Generally, nah not my thing. Can't imagine wanting it or doing it.
I would end it if you can't. He'll seek it elsewhere if it's what he thinks he 'needs'

I don’t think that’s remotely standard, I’m confused why you think it is. No I couldn’t do that, but from watching some tv shows I am aware a small minority of men are into this and there are some women who pander to it for money.

im sorry op, but id be out.

the book series 50 shades, has a lot to answer for in altering perceptions etc

I don’t think so. This is a bloke wanting to be hurt, it’s a very niche fetish. Not many women would be up for that. Or men if genders were reversed.

And 50 shades was fiction at its worst.