Help me calm down, Panic attack feelings for almost 24 hours

[happyjanuary1st]

Any advice is very very welcome, please be kind as I am having my 3rd bad night.
I have what I thought was a cold but think it may be Covid?

I woke at 3am this morning with what I think was a panic attack, no idea where it came from other than I panic when my nose is blocked and I can’t breathe (silly I know!)
I was walking around the house at 4am trying to breathe while my heart was pounding and I was feeling irrationally frightened for no obvious reason.

I woke feeling like my heart was pounding like I had had a huge fright, I have been feeling like I have a huge huge ball of anxiety in my stomach ever since, I can’t settle, I can’t get rid of the very very strong panicky feeling I have but I can’t identify the cause, I haven’t slept well for two nights and I think I have had less then 6 hours sleep since I woke early on Friday morning.

I have had an absolutely dreadful 2 years that started 2 years ago last month, it includes the diagnosis and death of a parent, accident to surviving member requiring a lots of support/help and numerous different emotional situations relating to several different family members.
It has caused a lot of stress, both physical and mental, causing physical effects such as hair loss, pain issues and more

I have dealt with all the practical support needed and haven’t actually allowed myself to grieve, the support required is still ongoing.

I haven't looked after myself at all until about 3 weeks ago when I realised how much I had neglected myself and took a small step back, I’m not sure if the trauma of the past two years has finally caught up with me or if I just am reacting irrationally?

I just can’t seem to calm myself down today, I am absolutely exhausted, I have this huge feeling of panic in my stomach and can’t calm down
I can’t order my thoughts, I can’t express fully how I am feeling and I absolutely couldn’t tell you why I am feeling this way or what has caused it happen now?

I am 55 and peri meno, I have forgotten to change my HRT patch for 36 hours, not sure if that has added to it?

Any tips at all are very much appreciated to lose this dreadful panicky feeling or if anyone relates I would love to know that I am not feeling irrational, I’ve poured myself a glass of wine to see if that helps?(I don’t usually drink but I really need to sleep and can’t)

Really not sure if this is medication/health related. May be worth a GP visit if still rough tomorrow.

for severe anxious state I try and do some totally different physical change.

Ideas - stand outside for 5 minutes. Get into a hot deep bath. Heavy weighted pressure on top of you while lying down. You tube meditation. Lie down on floor, legs up along the wall for 5 minutes.

Oh you poor thing OP certainly sounds like you’ve got a lot on your mind. I was having anxiety attacks a few days ago and what really helped me was to sit quietly and talk to myself like I was a small child. I told myself out loud that I was safe, I was ok, it’s just a panic attack. Just used very calming and soothing words exactly like you’re talking to a 5 year old. I was really shocked at how effective it was for me just to soothe my own thoughts like that

I hope you can manage to find a way to cut through the noise - it’s so debilitating isn’t it?

Thank you, I have no prescribed medication, I have struggled over the last two years with the stress but haven’t been to see a GP, I’ve tried a hot shower this evening along with several spells in a fresh air but can’t seen to find reprieve, I will look into mediation thank you.

Just breath. Take deep breaths.
Reassure yourself that this will pass.
Be kind to yourself.
You can get through this.
Hugs.

Thank you. I’ve been trying it tell myself all day that I’m ok but the panicky reaction seams physical rather than logical if that makes sense? I’m sorry to hear you have been having attacks too, it is awful isn’t it

Panic and anxiety is no joke. It can strike as a result of trauma, or for no apparent reason at all. It's natural and happens to a lot of us. Be kind to yourself. If you find you cannot cope, get yourself to your GP. Medication or other treatments may help depending on your situation.

There’s a thing called 4 square breathing.

Breathe in deeply while counting to 8, hold for 8, breathe out for 8, then wait for 8 and repeat.

Also find a focal point, something like a nice photo, plant etc. and look at it while concentrating on your breathing.

And a friend of mine swears by stepping outside in her bare feet so she can feel grounded.

And definitely talk to a doctor as there are medications that can help immensely if natural interventions aren’t helping you.

I hope you feel better soon.

Personally, if you've been walking around for hours feeling like you're unable to breathe, I'd go get some form of medical help to get it checked out.

No wonder youre having panic attacks op.

It's OK. Panic attacks are the body's way of responding to prolong stress and fear - and you've certain had that.

I find box breathing really helpful.
Breathe in for the count of 4.
Gently hold for 4
Breathe out for the count of 4
Gently hold for 4

Repeat...

The app One Deep Breath has a really good box breathing exercise (free).

Other things I find which help...

Soothing music
Giving my hands something to do
Self-soothing (brushing hair, taking a shower, eating something or a hot drink)
Going for a walk (perhaps round your garden at this time if you have one)
Listening to a podcast or radio

The gp can really help so please do get in touch with them. You can probably also self refer to counselling in your area.
There's also the samaritans if you need to talk to someone in person

Remember, you're ok and you're safe. This is your body telling you it's time to look after you now.

Have you changed your hrt patch now?

Second posters suggesting getting checked, but for the here and now, is there anything that you can usually easily get absorbed in? Something that usually draws in your attention and occupies your thoughts, where you can end up losing hours to it? For me, the absolute best thing for feeling like this is video games — not some game i i can play on autopilot like Tetris or Candy Crush, but something that needs a bit of focus, like pinball, racing games, open world stuff, the Sims, that sort of thing. You might not play video games, but maybe you get that absorption and focus with a particular type of music, or a particular TV show or film genre, or a physical activity. I dunno, model-building. Whatever's most likely to be able to capture and hold your currently skittish mind.

It'll be harder than usual to focus and settle to something and get properly absorbed, but if there's any way you can drag your brain somewhere else and draw its attention away from what you're feeling, it can help quite a lot because otherwise, the sensations and the feelings and the thoughts can end up feeding each other.

You have had a huge amount to deal with, you must be overwhelmed

Sometimes panic stays for a while when there has been too much stress for too long.

I’ve been there OP. Here’s a big hug and hand hold from me. I’ve had anxiety and panic attacks for much of my life and one thing some people don’t realise is that the panic attack feeling isn’t always short-term - it can last for days and it’s really, really horrible when you feel like you can’t get out of it. Menopause can definitely contribute to it, on top of all the stress you’ve had. I’m sorry you lost your parent and have had so much to think about you couldn’t grieve properly - it sounds awful. I agree with PPs suggestions and here are mine too.

The first thing is that I’ve found having someone listen and confirm to you that you are having an anxiety attack can in itself help, so I hope the thread helps.

Secondly you need to try to relax your body. Try box breathing, where you breathe in for a count of five, hold your breath for five, breathe out for 5 then hold for five again, and repeat. Bear with it, it doesn’t feel right at first but gradually it calms you down. Also, I like doing a mindfulness exercise where you tighten all the muscles in your body in turn, start from feet and work up to your face, then relax each one. I use an app called Feeling Good which has this and other exercises on it and it really helps. You have to get a referral from the GP to unlock the full app but it has some free starter exercises that you can try now.

I would see the GP and ask for that, and also, although it won’t solve the emotional feelings you need to work through of course, medication can really help. For me Venlafaxine (a very low dose) takes the edge off my anxiety day to day so I can live normally. And for times when it breaks through and I have a really bad day, diazepam I.e. Valium is a godsend. You can’t take it regularly and the GP will only give you a small supply but it absolutely deals with that pounding heart, adrenaline pumped feeling when you need it to. Just knowing I have a few in the house helps me relax so I rarely need them, but they are great to have there.

Cross-posted about the breathing! I hope some of these things will bring relief for right now OP.

Try some breathing exercises 4 square or alternate nostril breathing exercises, try repeating a mantra to yourself, this will pass

Try the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). It is a clinically proven way of calming yourself so that you’ll feel less anxious. It’s easy to learn and is similar to acupuncture but using tapping instead of needles.

I’ve found the best way to use it is to score your anxiety level out of 10. Say you select 8/10, so a high level of anxiety. Now do the EFT two or three times. Score again - most people feel they’re 2 or 3 points less anxious.

Use EFT whenever you feel you need it.

Lots of info and advice on utube https://counselling-matters.org.uk/emotional-freedom-technique-eft/

Thank you so much to everyone who has posted, it has made me think about how much I have carried over the last two years, I haven’t seen a GP mainly because I know counselling is the usual way forward and I don’t feel ready/willing to talk about it and I’m very much still in the eye of the storm but the physical effects have shocked me today to the point it has made me realise how little I’ve looked after myself.

I’ve walked around the garden many times tonight, I changed the HRT patch as soon as I realise I was a couple of days late, I’m hoping the panic feeling may be hormone related?
I’ve googled the breathing exercises, thank you to those that have recommended those, I’m usually very very rational.calm which is why todays physical effects have shocked me

As a PP said, sometimes stress catches up with you and your body lets you know you need to pay attention to yourself - and it can be a shock how physically it can affect you. But lots of these methods and exercises really can make a difference. You also need to process your feelings, as and when you’re able to, but you can look after yourself and calm yourself when you need to, and the more of these methods you have to hand, the stronger you will feel.

Op it maybe worth checking your pulse some heart irregular rhythms can feel like your symptoms.

Hot shower, I would have thought splashing cold water on your face would be better.

They say deep breathing exercises too help.
Telling yourself it will pass and things will get better.

The gp can help in other ways too.

They might looking at tweaking your hrt. They can prescribe medication to help with anxiety too, from beta blockers to anti depressants (some are really effective for anxiety).

And you're probably more likely to be offered CBT rather than psychotherapy counselling, which isn't about talking through everything and more about finding practical strategies and ways to cope.

So sorry to read this, I have struggled badly with panic attacks in the past and it's rubbish when you just can't get rid of that feeling. I find moving around helps - even just pacing (counting steps used to help focus my mind a bit) or doing silly exercises like lying on my back and kicking my legs in the air. I find if you do something that would naturally elevate your heart rate a little bit, you're not so aware of it being unnaturally fast (this is something that used to freak me out and get me deeper into the panic spiral).

A couple of years ago I had a period of struggling very badly and wasn't getting much help from the GP (they kept telling me to journal). It came to a head when I had a full day of non-stop panicking and my partner ended up taking me to a&e at night because he didn't know what else to do. My brain was so fried, I barely felt like i was on this planet but the nurses were lovely to me, they brought me out of the waiting room and found me a quiet place to sit. My resting heart rate was 130. Took a couple of hours to be seen by the doctor but she gave me a few tablets of diazepam for the immediate term and wrote to my GP to ask them to see me the following Monday (it was a Saturday). The A&E doctor recommended I start setraline and I did, it has been fantastic for me (2.5 years on it and counting). Not intended to advise you to do the same per se but just to say do ask for help if you're struggling, panic attacks can be so debilitating. I feel for you and hope you feel better soon x

(Assuming nothing else causing these symptoms for you) I totally agree that the physical effects of anxiety and panic can be shockingly… physical, if that makes sense. Especially if like you say you're normally calm and controlled. Like, how could my mind make that happen 🤣 But then I suppose my mind can make my body do all kinds of dramatic things, like swing a punch, or make all my body hair stick up when I hear Allegri's Miserere.

It can help with managing this stuff to acknowledge how physical symptoms, sensations, emotions and thoughts might ramp each other up. Like maybe a fast heartbeat makes you feel panicky and then your thoughts start to spin around, or you think about something you did and it makes you feel embarrassed and you go hot and sweaty. The useful thing about this is that it gives you many different options for where/how to intervene i.e. how to interrupt all this back and forth.

Some people find the best place to attack it is the physical, so maybe slowing their breaths brings everything else to manageable levels. Some people find soothing their emotions with calming pleasures is what can interrupt the feedback loops. For some people, a particular strong sensory input overrides the sensations they feel and the shock stops their thoughts for a second, so they attack the anxiety there. Some people (me!) find that occupying their brain, making them feel emotions linked to that activity and filling their mind with thoughts about the activity can jam up the anxiety mechanism for a while. Some people find different things work better at different times.

It's why this kind of thread always ends up with a dizzying array of wildly different options, that seem to be totally different because they're aiming at different spots, but with the same end goal. Any or all of them might work for you but if one doesn't, okay, that's not the place to focus your efforts right now, maybe try a different technique targeting a different part of the feedback loop.

Don’t click that link as for some reason it’s not working and it’s cbt 4 panic . Org if you want to find it on google

I used to wake during the night with panic attacks (often I'd be already climbing out of bed already before I woke up) but weirdly I got some relief from them by walking straight to the kitchen and getting myself a glass of cool tap water and drinking it down. And my panic attack would pass. I don’t know why, because I had panic attacks during the day and while drinking water sometimes helped a little, it never halted a panic attack like it did when I woke at night with one. (I did wonder if I was becoming dehydrated during the night - or experiencing a blood pressure drop or rise- and that would cause the rapid heart beat and set off the panic feelings).

Previous posters have given you some good advice - shared experiences- on how to deal with panic and anxiety long term. Seeking help from a doctor is the first best step.