Is anyone just really bored or fed up with life?

[AllAreBored]

I’ve recently moved into a new house. It’s a lovely, beautiful home but I don’t really feel any joy around it. All of the money for the house has come from DP, I only have small savings so I’ve paid the fees and he’s paid the deposit etc. So it feels like it’s not truly ‘ours’, more his. Even though he’s never held this against me and is just happy to be living together! People keep saying oh you must be so excited and i’m just… not

i have a good, secure job where I’m paid good money for what I do. I retrained for this. But I’m so bored, i’m bored of the job, the people I work with… I am on annual leave this week and I dread going back, is this really it for the next 40 years?

DS. I love him with all my heart, he’s my boy and I’m so lucky to have him but I hate being a mum, again I find it boring and just a drag, he’s 11 so independent enough but I feel like I’m counting down the years till he’s 18. Then I feel terrible about these feelings. I worry I’m going to fuck his head up so try to hide my feelings

Christmas etc. We had a lovely time, saw all family, had some lovely gifts, did some beautiful Christmas activities and DS loved all his presents and was so grateful. But it’s all done with now and it just feels very… what was the point?

I don’t really go out anymore, I can’t be bothered to socialise. We are usually a very sociable couple and I have made the effort but I can see DP is a bit confused and struggling but I’d much rather just stay in. We have an invite to a party tomorrow and we have a babysitter but I’ve already said I’m staying in. Again, I just find everything so boring and think what’s the point?

what is going on? Maybe I’m depressed? I feel so, so tired and overwhelmed by life and just keep thinking, what’s the point in anything? I’ve been thinking recently this isn’t how I wanted my life to be but then again I’m not sure what else it could be? Or what I actually thought it would be like. I feel like I’m living someone else’s life

Not too sure what the point of my post is but I feel I can’t really say anything to anyone and just wanted to get it off of my chest

OP in the nicest possible way it sounds like you may be depressed. I do understand how you feel to a certain point. I don’t love my job either and spending another 20 years in it for me is hard to fathom.

Being a Mum is incredibly hard and that often leaves you feeling tired.

However, for you it’s the not wanting to socialise as you used too and just feeling meh and overwhelmed by everything.

You clearly have a loving DP, DS and a new beautiful home which is as much yours as it is your DP’s. You can’t help your feelings but I would honestly speak to your GP about how you feel and get some help. If you don’t you will continue to feel this way and life will increasingly get harder and you’ll find it harder to find a way out. I’m speaking from experience of seeing it happen to a close friend of mine.

I’m sure others will be along with better advice for you. I just didn’t want to read and run. You deserve your life and to be happy. Contact your doctor. Find a way to enjoy life again.

I feel the same. No I’m not depressed, but I am in peri.
But I don’t really see the point of Xmas any more, it’s a lot of stress and money for what? I don’t have family to see, so it’s just another day at home. And I’ve never seen the point of new year, I’ll be in bed at 10pm reading, as that’s what I like to do.
I enjoy my work, so that’s not an issue with me.

I found sertraline 50mg very helpful for this low level constant 'meh' feeling. If left alone, it can get worse and worse and those 'whats the point?' type feeling can really take root. Try speaking to your GP and see what they think.

It is also winter and dark and some people find that really affects their mood. My GP told me not to try coming off sertraline during winter as it is generally harder and less successful.

As a PP has mentioned could it be hormonal? Peri? That gets blamed for everything on MN 😂but it can be pretty potent.

Peri can be a problem in this. I ended up going on HRT simply because I didn’t want to go out anywhere, and I knew I couldn’t spend the rest of my life like that.

Can you recall back to when this first started? Usually there is a trigger.

also is this time of year the anniversary of anything? Or have you lost loved ones you would usually spend Christmas with?

I have often felt like that OP, sometimes for quite long periods. I don't know is it a constant low level depression, where you are always a bit down but it's not that bad. I think see a GP.

Sometimes I wonder is it just life and middle age approaching, your life is set out for you now and you feel trapped in a world of your own creation. Hence the mid life crisis so often joked about. I often count the days til DC leave then dread the day I'm alone with DP as what I really want is to be alone because everyone around me seems to suck the energy from me. Then I feel so terribly guilty for feeling this way because my DC are healthy and I have a nice home and I am lucky therefore should be happy. Nothing is exciting or motivating anymore.

I don't have the answers OP but I get it.

How long have you been in your home? Sometimes the stress of getting there can give you the blues. Certainly did me when I moved here, and it's been one repair after the other here.

Do you get to go out and exercise? This is a good mood lifter, even if just a walk once per day.

Life is hard, and sometimes it gets us down. If it's none of those then maybe seeking GP advice would be a good step 💐

When I went through a lull I found gardening grounding.

The passage of time, the fact trees will shed leaves in autumn and blossom in spring, that grass will always grow until it gets too hot etc helped me remember that the world keeps spinning, regardless of whether I stay in or not.

Perhaps you could plan and enhance or just maintain the garden this year.

I would try and go to the party OP. If you see someone you know well talk to them say you feel a bit meh not all doom and gloom, you might be surprised how many feel similar.

I am strugglingly not to give you a huge kick up the arse. You are in such a privileged position compared to most people in the world.
I have bipolar so understand lows well and you are in one. The best cure is to make changes to your life. It's hard when feeling low but you have the privilege of housing security, a nice sounding family, a boring but safe job.
It might be peri related (HRT has saved me) so get that looked at. But also do something about it. Force yourself to go out walking in new places, join a new sport team, look at a career change, go to the party and fake enjoy it.
I have managed to do all of the above after being sectioned. It was fucking tough and my circumstances where 100 times worse than yours. But it worked. I refused ADs as they always disagree with me and instead did the following:
Took up netball (love it am shite at it!)
Joined a choir
Learnt to deep relax (yoga Nidra)
Joined a charity board (and as a result ended up 2 years later with a total career change)
Went walking everyday.
My motivation was not to be sectioned again and kept away from my very young children. It was tough. So very fucking tough. We had no money (I had lost my job due to being a complete nutter 😁), and no family support. But we did it. The reason I want to give you a kick is because that is what a good friend of mine did. Everyone else was being gentle and she grabbed my face and said "it's only you that can change this". She was right. Same with you.
It's hard, in a strange way when you know there is no reason (this was me growing up - stable home, warmth, food on the table etc but depressed. Made me feel terrible at the time for being a spoilt brat).
OP do something positive and never more relevant is the "fake it til you make it" adage.💐

Thanks everyone for taking the time to respond. I’m don’t think I’m peri as I’m only 31 but who knows.

i swim daily so i am getting exercise. I know how privileged I am, 10 years ago I had left a DV relationship with my baby, was in a hostel on benefits so believe me, I know how bad times can be but it’s not about what I’ve got it’s how I feel. I just feel like absolutely everything is pointless, I can’t describe the feeling. Like even when i am
enjoying myself in the back of my mind I’m thinking this feeling won’t last, tomorrow this moment will just be a memory.

I think I’m going to see my GP when they’re back open and maybe taken a hobby, something just for me. I feel silly feeling this way as I am so lucky but then at the other end of the scale I just think is this it, is this life?

thanks again for the responses

Does sound like you are depressed.
I used to work on a psychiatric hospital.
People from all walks of life suffer with depression. From prostitues to solicitors

Theres medication out there like Prozac to help you. Go to your GP and a course of antidepressants should do the trick. 👍