Life choices - what to do next

[Tillybud81]

Hi all, just after some opinions and maybe some advice. I'm 42, not long out of a LTR and no kids. I'm really struggling with what the hell I want to do next with my life, everything seems so open to me but I'm struggling.
So I'm thinking either stay in my really quite good job, save as much as I can and buy my first house by myself (currently living with my mum) but then be stuck with a mortgage

Save a bit more and quit said good job and go travelling again (did this in my 20s and ended up living in Australia for 10 years) but then I might not have savings to then buy a house on my return.

Stay with mum and in my job, do some short term travelling/holidays and maybe buy a house in another year.

I'm so stuck, some days I want to pack it all in and do one but worry I'll burn through too much savings and not get a decent job again.

Any wise advice appreciated

I’m at a similar crossroads, although for different reasons. It seems the more choices I have the harder it is to decide.

In your position I’d travel. It’s not a great time to buy a property, I’d give it a couple of years before considering that personally.

At least you can come back and stay with your mum before finding another job, it may take a while, but it’s only a job. You only get one life, go for it.

Option A otherwise you may be having the same dilemma in 10 years time.

Is finding a job similar to yours but overseas an option? Living abroad but still earning good money js a great way to get a break, meet new people (choose somewhere with a good ex pat scene) and reevaluate what you want next.

You've already done the 'travelling' thing once OP. You need to sit down and ask yourself what do you truly want?
There are more options than just packing it in or staying the same. You could quit and become a contractor taking jobs around the globe if your industry allows it. Alternatively, if you just want to 'achieve' something take up a new hobby that's physically and mentally challenging like, I don't know, rock climbing, pole dance, whatever.

Of course it's possible to save enough to buy a property and invest so that you can come home and buy immediately but the trouble is your 'travel' burning through savings. You're too old for a working holiday visa (IIRC) but even so at 42 are you happy backpacking and living off minimal money?

Not having a home would freak me out so that would be my priority. Can you stay at your mums for a while longer and save hard so you have a good deposit?

I think at your age buying somewhere should be a priority, OP, simply because you'll get a longer term mortgage now.

Could you buy somewhere and have a lodger, then save the lodger's money and go off travelling once you've got enough money and rent the place out to pay the mortgage and upkeep? I've seen too many women who are financially vulnerable at your age to suggest you spend your money on travelling now.

Option A would be my choice too.

Thanks everyone for your replies.

I'm leaning towards the house and getting myself set up, I'm in the best position I've ever been in to buy myself a home and know I should be doing it.

Like I said I've done the travelling and have dual citizenship in Australia so thats always an option to go back, but I'm not sure what work I could get. I don't really have an industry or a career, I've done all sorts but mostly admin.

Tbh emotionally I'm not too settled at the moment which is probably why the indecision is there, the future I thought I had planned has gone. I need to work on that first before any big decisions.

Thanks again everyone

Does your DM mind you living with her?
A relative of mine was in a similar situation to you, she chose to travel/work abroad. 10 years later she moved back in with her DM, her DM was mid 70’s then and getting quite frail. My relative did help her DM a lot but it also delayed her moving to more suitable accommodation as she didn’t want to move until her daughter was settled. The DM ended up moving straight to a nursing home, it would have been nice if she’d had a few years in a sheltered type of accommodation set up.
So I think it’s worth thinking about the wider implications of any plans you make.

I do feel for you OP. Starting again is hard. It might help to do some introspection and think of the sort of person you are. Also what opportunities are out there and how to build a financial nest egg.

Personally I like my creature comforts and could never slum it (even as a 20 something) but I also wanted to work all over the globe. Not backpackers/picking fruit/visiting tourist sites. So I chose a job that allows me to pick up short-term contracts all over the globe. 6 months to a year.

If you get a flat that will have rental demand you can have lodgers, you'd have to secure your possessions etc though. The important thing is that a significant chunk of your mortgage is already paid off so you can withstand any void periods.

best of luck whatever you decide. Remember you can always travel but having a home to return to is important.

She's fine with me staying as long as I need. She's just moved into a bungalow and is still quite independent so hopefully won't be needing to move for a while.
I'd likely be a year wih her at the most, as much as I don't mind being here I definitely can't stay forever.