I came out of hospital last week and really appreciated a USB extension lead, the type with multiple ports that plugs into the wall with an extra long cable. I had the bank plugged into the wall and then it sat on my table, and I had all my chargers (all USB) plugged into it so I could grab everything easily.
Someone also brought me a 2 litre insulated water bottle that kept water cold for ages. The little jugs of water you get go warm within about half an hour and the cups are always gross to drink from. I poured the water into the bottle when it was cold and it stayed cold for ages.
The very best thing of all though was an audible subscription. Someone bought me a block of 12 credits (so 12 books!) and I basically listened to books and chilled with my eyes closed while I was too poorly to do much, and then when I got better I listened to them while doing other stuff. I was often too tired or couldn’t concentrate to watch TV for long, but audio books and podcasts were much less taxing.
The thing that helped my family the most while I was in was my best friend who took my washing home with her and washed and dried it every time she visited. She ended up with a collection of my clothes/ pj’s and so she just brought the clean ones back to me on a rotation and eventually she just took over that entire aspect. It was one less thing for my family to think about, and it meant she also had a role and a way to feel useful/ keep visiting.
What I will say is be mindful that EVERYONE always says ‘we’ll let me know how I can help and I’m here for you’ etc etc and you never quite feel comfortable taking them up on the offer. It also puts pressure on the family/ sick person to think of things someone can do without asking for something cheeky etc. It’s almost hollow if that makes sense? If you genuinely want to offer help, offer something very specific and extremely practical you are happy to do for them, like ‘hi XXX, while ZZZ is in hospital I’d like to take care of this very specific job if that would be helpful? If you have something else youd like me to do instead please let me know but I thought this might elevate some of the pressure in a small way?’ - we had a few people approach us like this and we ended up with a little team of 4 people. They set up a WhatsApp group where I or my family could post what we needed and someone would usually pick up the message and claim the ‘quest’ as they became known
. The WhatsApp group also allowed me to update everyone on what was happening in one place and they also used it to sort out who was visiting when and what needed bringing to me. For example, if BFF had done my washing but wasn’t visiting that day, she’s post in the WhatsApp and someone else who was due to visit would arrange to collect it. We had a 3 person washing relay race one week Where a middle man delivered the washing to the visitor, it was all very exciting. I have weird and excellent friends.
My point on that is take as much of the ‘thinking’
off the family as possible and that will always be useful. My husband never ate better than while I was inside too, he and the kids got fed pretty much every day by either something someone put in the freezer for them, or cooked and plated up for when he got home from visiting. I’d say the food and the babysitting while he visited me alone were huge things too.