A thread for the SEN parents sat in their kids’ rooms waiting for them to go to sleep

[Brackhurst]

There is Baileys and gin downstairs. There is also a Barbie Dreamhouse to get in from the car, put together and attempt to wrap. But I imagine the Baileys will help.

Solidarity to the rest of you. May you have food and drink in your hand shortly. I was aiming for 9 but looks to be at least 9:30 at this rate. Good thing DC is one of the two best things in the universe 🥰

I can't see ds going to bed before midnight, my head is battered as he has been on the ceiling all day.

Thankfully at 15 we don't need to be overly secretive, just surprising. (He manages that, it's the same every year)

Sympathy to everyone. I’ve just taken an overheated overexcited DS for a walk around the garden to spot Santa. He’s gone to
bed and all appears to be quiet. A Mumsnetter recommended it, something about the cool dark fresh air and then getting back into a warm bed.

Solidarity but what you need is a melatonin prescription or to go to France to buy some. Merry Christmas

Yes. We only use it as a reset button though - which is how the consultant advised us to use it. It works well, but won't keep them asleep (which is part of our issue, frequent night wakings on top of difficulty falling asleep).

@Motti it has changed our lives DC is 8 and has asd and adhd, before they would fall asleep around 10-11 after arguing all night and would wake 4-6am. Now they settle down after a story at 8pm, asleep 8.30-9pm and up 5-6am. Fewer mood swings and we feel less shattered as we get a few hours “break” of an evening.

No side effects what so ever for us.

It also meant we could have a holiday away from home that was enjoyed as they could fall asleep in a new environment.

So far (10 days in) it's a big yes. If you time it all right (which we didn't tonight) it can take DS only 10 mins to fall asleep vs 60-90 mins! Has mostly slept through, although with illness we've had 3am wake ups the last few nights. No nightmares that I've noticed but have seen a reduced appetite - but might not be related.

Hello and solidarity!

By some miracle, youngest has now gone to bed but will probably be up by 4am latest.
She insisted on leaving out the carrot/cookie etc for Santa even though she knows it’s me. She even pointed that out but had to do the routine the same as always.
Eldest is waiting for something to download on the computer and is treating it like a normal Sunday night.
Christmas isn’t happening for him until it’s actually happening if you get my meaning.

Great idea for a thread. My DD is still awake and my idea of maybe watching Die Hard with a ginger wine will shortly be written off. She’s worked herself up to feeling poorly, which worries her, then she worries she’s worrying so much she’ll be poorly, so worries more…Shaun the Sheep is still helping, bless him, been with her since her first night on Earth. Have a peaceful Christmas Day, all.

Ah thanks everyone, that’s really helpful. I think we really need to pursue it as we’ve just got used to the long/ protracted evenings but this gives me hope that it could be different!

God bless melatonin is all I can say.

3 of them in our house tonight + 2 nt strangely 2 of the sen went straight to sleep ( they dibt understand but usually up late ) and the elder one is beyond the age. Missions to go with the other 2 good luck to all tonight!

Been Watching Malory Towers all night with my 14 yer old DD. She won't be asleep until 2am at the earliest so it'll be a late one for me to lay out all the gifts and get things sorted. My hopes for some festive viewing with an advocaat are dwindling....

Operation Santa has, touching everything, been completed in this house during the last 10 min......I am expecting a 3am wake up however so I'm going to bed now 😴 🤣 good luck all!

I’m sitting downstairs at the moment but fully expect to be back in the bedroom shortly. Can’t put presents out until I know for sure they are both asleep

Our DD (age 6 with Down syndrome) thankfully went to sleep quickly. She is coughing a lot though so am praying she stays asleep and doesn’t pull her CPAP mask off (the alarm wakes the whole house!) DH managed to build her light up vanity table quickly and have had a drink. It’s the first year she has kind of understood anything about it and when we said to go to bed for Father Christmas she was pretty compliant! Good luck everyone, fingers crossed for you!

My DD is upstairs pottering following her first day on her newly prescribed ADHD meds. She has ASD and ADHD and already struggles to fall asleep. We may look into melatonin but having had the first day in about 3 years with manageable emotions and no meltdowns we are celebrating an amazing Christmas Eve 🥳. Here’s hoping it’s not a fluke and the meds do actually help ! You’re all doing an amazing job ! Hope they all fall asleep very soon !

Mine are in bed, though today DS has snapped DH glasses and given me a fat lip by throwing a paint bottle at my face. I'm on the Christmas cake and Santa's sherry and waiting to be picked up to go to midnight mass.

We've given up. He's awake upstairs reading and we are watching TV. It's getting worse and 2+ hours in a dark room is not sustainable.

Currently sitting with 11yo DS1 - younger 2 both asleep.
He has PDA and has firmly instructed us to hide his stocking and not mention Christmas at all this evening or his mind will refuse to allow him to sleep. This is tricky with a 5 year old in the house on Christmas Eve! So I took the younger 2 out to a panto and DH stayed home and pretended it wasn't Christmas Eve with him all day.
Thankfully got all the wrapping done last week.
He's trying really hard to settle and normally manages to be asleep by 11 but he's agitated tonight. He also sleepwalks so even once asleep there are no guarantees! Thankfully he's like a baby elephant so I always wake up if he tries to go to the kitchen and make toast or something in his sleep.

@Motti we started melatonin when DS started going to sleep really late. We don't give it on weekends. He also sleeps through thank goodness but I know it's generally better for health to try to avoid shifting sleep patterns even if it doesn't matter from a work/school point of view, so we do sometimes give it on holiday weekdays too.
He's 11 and was diagnosed aged 7.

7 year old still up, in bed but not asleep so can’t do stockings doh. Last night he dropped off around 11.

Only suspected adhd here. Still on the waiting list for the middle child. He’s regularly up till midnight on exciting occasions. He’s desperately trying to go to sleep for Santa and we are desperately trying not to drink to much so we can make the magic happen 🎅🏻

So proud of mine tonight. For the first time in over 5 years he has gone to sleep without a dummy. Instead he's left them in the bottom of his stocking for Father Christmas to "give to the babies" and leave him a present in exchange, after weeks of preparation and getting used to the idea. He even asked to wash them this evening so they were clean for the babies 🥲

Dummies are now cut up and in the wheelie bin outside so no chance of coming back!

I am however, sleeping in his bed tonight to prevent him trying to open stocking presents when he undoubtedly wakes up at midnight 🙄

@Motti we've used melatonin for 3 years and it's worked very well. It's why DH and I aren't divorced tbh. We give a small dose daily and rarely take a break (unless she's going to be up very late anyway). I honestly think she's just lacking in it.