Shiva Basket

[Cloakanddagger101]

A school mum & dad have just lost their baby at 22 week’s pregnant.

The rest of us want to send them a gift to let them know we’re thinking of them.

After lots of debate, we’re stepping away from anything too personal and as they’re Jewish we want to do something more inline with their religion.

Google suggest food is the best option and to send a Shiva basket.

We know they don’t eat pork but we don’t know if they eat Kosher food or not. Anyone have any ideas what would be the best food basket to send?

I’m Jewish. Not knowing how ‘Jewish’ someone is, sending food can be a bit of a minefield. Me personally, I would appreciate a thoughtful card with a kind and personal message.

I had a loss, albeit a bit earlier than 22 weeks, and I have to say that I would have been pretty shocked to receive ‘funeral’ type things. It was a loss but I think I would have found it quite traumatic if someone had reacted in the same ways as if my nan had died. It’s just different, or it was to me. I needed a different sort of connection and support.

I did have friends send me flowers and cards (flowers are not to everyone’s taste but they made me feel really seen), but the cards meant a lot. I’d send a card with personal messages from all of you, and then check in, offer practical support (play date for older child, etc).

@mindutopia thank you for replying.

From the group chat it is clear that grief is such a personal thing and there is no one size fits all.

We’d read that flowers were a big no no in Jewish culture. Is that not the case?

This is why we’d settled on a hamper, we felt it was respectful of their religion but not too personal or sentimental.

We want to send something that just lets them know we’re all there thinking of them.