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Worried about family member

2 replies

WinterSparkles · 17/12/2023 14:51

It’s my dad.
My mum is a narcissist as well as having severe anxiety and depression. She has got worse over the years. Refuses to go on holidays, looks on the dark side of everything, super critical of everyone and cannot handle any form of stress. My brother is also mentally ill and is rude to my dad and myself. My mum makes excuses for him saying that if we challenge the behaviour he might end it all. He is 32 but acts more like a stroppy 13 year old. Has a girlfriend but it’s an asexual relationship and he is never rude to her. While my mother panics constantly about my brothers mental health he is out having fun most nights but she won’t go anywhere too far just in case brother goes into an episode of his. Basically we all tiptoe around him and my mother. The other night after another family argument instigated by my mother, my dad broke down into sobs saying he couldn’t cope anymore. He is ex army and I have never seen him like that. He then said he wished he could skip Christmas and go on a long work break and that he also didn’t realise how miserable he would be at this time in his life. I am so upset for him and also scared. Not sure why I am posting but it’s incredibly tough to see your dad in that state and it’s shaken me up and left me wondering what I can do to help.

OP posts:
MugsAplentyForMe · 17/12/2023 17:08

Your dad is big enough and old enough to walk away and make a new life for himself if he chooses.

Who supports your mum with her anxiety and depression?

WhichIsItWendy · 17/12/2023 17:12

Can you offer him somewhere to stay as respite? Time for him to think away from your mum and brother?

It's really hard. He's going to need to seek some proper support, it's hard when you're in the family and invested.

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