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Original poster

My team hate my manager

20 replies

pootlefump · 10/12/2023 23:21

And it's for good reason! I manage a small team and we are closely managed by my manager (not sure if that makes sense but I line manage 3 people and my manager just manages me).

My manager is probably the laziest, most ridiculously over-paid manager I have had in my 30 year career so far. He doesn't join meetings and makes up other meetings that clash as an excuse, he probably works 2 hours a day as on the rare occasion I ring him he is always doing something else in the background (driving or doing something obviously not the day job, definitely not sat at a desk working). I can see his diary and it's often empty at times when he says he can't join a meeting due to a clash. Sometimes I just laugh at the ridiculousness of it and why he thinks no-one notices this. He does have the gift of the gab though.

I have managed to cope with this and just got on with my job (which consists of his job too as he's very good at sending work down!) for the past year but the problem is the team have realised what he's like, and they are not as inclined to just 'get on with it'. He's caused a lot of this himself because he has a rude tone in meetings and emails and has upset a couple of them. One of them is quite vocal back and it's causing me a lot of stress.

I've tried to diplomatically talk to my managers manager but they're really good mates, have worked together for years and it's v dodgy ground for my career. It probably doesn't come across at all by the way I've written this post but we're talking quite senior roles in the public sector.

I actually like my job just not this situation which doesn't appear to be resolving any time soon. I don't know whether to just have it out with my manager and tell him what's what, and risk my future in this role, or try to keep the peace as best I can. It's incredibly difficult trying to be professional whilst agreeing with what the team are saying as it's such a blatant example of a very bad leader!

If anyone has any experience of this and can give me any advice it would be most welcome Confused

OP posts:
Hugbooo1 · 10/12/2023 23:38

Can you go to HR?

Hugbooo1 · 10/12/2023 23:38

Ps I hate my assistant manager who brown noses my actual manager and I’m in the process of writing up evidence to escalate it to the higher ups.

kissnm · 10/12/2023 23:41

Wow I could have written this post. Happy to discuss more via PM, but I’d advise against having it out with them.

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Original poster
pootlefump · 10/12/2023 23:44

HR haven't helped as I broached it a few months ago. If things were v bad then I guess it would be a grievance but we're not there. (Yet)

Please pm me if you're experiencing similar!

Thanks both for reading and replying Grin

OP posts:
Hugbooo1 · 10/12/2023 23:54

I’d keep a log and as much evidence as you can and then go to HR

he’s gonna fuck up at some point

Redsheeps · 10/12/2023 23:59

How can you be closely managed if he’s so remote?
I think its pretty common for people to resent management but at the end of the day they are there to make the big calls. Also the gift of the gab is probably one of the skills of management? Dealing with all sorts of people on a daily?

Anneta · 11/12/2023 00:17

Absolutely don’t have it out with him! It sounds like he has friends higher up and these people manage to get promoted, especially when he can talk the talk. I would advise you to look out for your own career. Perhaps look out for another post such as a promotion or a sideways move within your team to “further your experIence”. In your role you need to be seen as supporting your line manager, so try not to get personally involved in the crossfire between your team and him. I know several people who took grievances where I used to work in the public sector and the management closed ranks, rewrote the evidence and it didn’t end well for team members involved, causing a great deal of stress.

LlynTegid · 11/12/2023 09:38

Focus on the rudeness I suggest, preferably in a conversation face to face with him if possible.

Original poster
pootlefump · 12/12/2023 19:20

Thank you for all the advice on this. It definitely isn't normal and he's taking the p like I've never known anyone do in 30 years of my working life! It's incredibly frustrating and it's the bare faced lies I can't deal with like 'sorry I've been on calls all afternoon' when I've been trying to get hold of him (which I rarely do). Mate your outlook diary is empty and compare it to mine and yet you earn so much more. I'd prefer it if he was just honest with me or at least not take me for a complete mug. . Totally unjust and I've had enough really.

OP posts:
Swishyfishy · 12/12/2023 19:25

Internal move?

IGotItFromAgnes · 12/12/2023 19:35

I’m genuinely wondering if this is someone I used to work with.

It’s a bit shit if there are two of them who are that lazy.A few of us complained about the one I knew but never got anywhere, and last I heard he’d been promoted (fuck knows how / why).

You’re never going to change someone like that. I’d be looking for a new job.

RaisinsOfMildAnnoyance · 12/12/2023 19:41

Ime, once you feel contempt for your manager, you're done. Time to look elsewhere, op, regardless of his shit behaviour.

WhateverMate · 12/12/2023 19:45

I manage a small team and we are closely managed by my manager (not sure if that makes sense but I line manage 3 people and my manager just manages me).

How is he closely managing you and the team though?

kissnm · 12/12/2023 19:58

To be fair, people phone me as soon as my teams status is green so it’s normal to be in calls all day even if the calendar is empty

but I too am also wondering if we are speaking about the same person! There’s lots of useless people in civil service

nameychangio675 · 12/12/2023 20:55

I used to have a manager like this, civil service, head of department, the most incompetent, lazy, immoral man I have ever worked under. Luckily when the new head honcho came in he immediately got the measure of him and he was shipped out sideways then down. The man was on serious money and absolutely took the p*ss. You could not make it up.

My advice - can you go higher, even if it is just logging concerns. It will catch up at some point.

Original poster
pootlefump · 12/12/2023 20:57

WhateverMate · 12/12/2023 19:45

I manage a small team and we are closely managed by my manager (not sure if that makes sense but I line manage 3 people and my manager just manages me).

How is he closely managing you and the team though?

Sorry I don't mean closely managed like 8 hours a day... I shouldn't have used the word 'closely'!

He does the absolute minimum to get away with it, although his lack of work seems to be invisible to those above him.

There are a few things that he knows if we don't do them right he might get questioned therefore he's on top of us for those.

I can't stress enough how little he does. But it's the lying about it that does my head in more!

How he doesn't know that we (his team) know this i do not know. There's a certain ignorance there for sure.

The team then bitch to me and I feel so unprofessional but I simply can't defend him.

Those who think it might be the same person feel free to DM me!

OP posts:
Original poster
pootlefump · 12/12/2023 21:00

IGotItFromAgnes · 12/12/2023 19:35

I’m genuinely wondering if this is someone I used to work with.

It’s a bit shit if there are two of them who are that lazy.A few of us complained about the one I knew but never got anywhere, and last I heard he’d been promoted (fuck knows how / why).

You’re never going to change someone like that. I’d be looking for a new job.

Yep he's just been promoted!

OP posts:
Original poster
pootlefump · 12/12/2023 21:01

nameychangio675 · 12/12/2023 20:55

I used to have a manager like this, civil service, head of department, the most incompetent, lazy, immoral man I have ever worked under. Luckily when the new head honcho came in he immediately got the measure of him and he was shipped out sideways then down. The man was on serious money and absolutely took the p*ss. You could not make it up.

My advice - can you go higher, even if it is just logging concerns. It will catch up at some point.

Thank you and sounds very similar

OP posts:
Original poster
pootlefump · 12/12/2023 21:05

kissnm · 12/12/2023 19:58

To be fair, people phone me as soon as my teams status is green so it’s normal to be in calls all day even if the calendar is empty

but I too am also wondering if we are speaking about the same person! There’s lots of useless people in civil service

Edited

I completely get this and I have the same situation but not this person. He doesn't use Teams much (nope no idea why despite it being our org system) and whenever I ring him without fail he is either driving or doing something in the background that isn't work (like I have heard him selotaping parcels or at least that's what it sounds like)

OP posts:
Original poster
pootlefump · 12/12/2023 21:10

Redsheeps · 10/12/2023 23:59

How can you be closely managed if he’s so remote?
I think its pretty common for people to resent management but at the end of the day they are there to make the big calls. Also the gift of the gab is probably one of the skills of management? Dealing with all sorts of people on a daily?

Sorry for the flurry of responses but this is all so helpful. This is the other funny thing - he doesn't make decisions! The amount of times he says 'I'll need to get a decision or sign off from X' and the team are all just thinking 'but you're so senior just make the decision!'

Honestly I'm embarrassed for him in this respect.

I think I just need to calm down and hope that someone nearer the top with more influence sees this one day and shit finally comes the way it deserves. I have to stop letting it get to me so much though.

OP posts:
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