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How would you respond to this weird behaviour

34 replies

Eekmystro · 10/12/2023 21:43

My son who is 10 is currently sat on his bedroom floor banging his hand repeatedly on the floor. Not massively hard but loud enough that it’s causing annoyance. He seems to be doing it to annoy everyone else. I’ve been in and tried to talk to him reasonably, I’ve removed his laptop time tomorrow and now I’m in bed trying to ignore it.

All I’ve got out of him is that he is frustrated and angry. Won’t say why. There was incident that I can recall from before he started banging.

Im minded to ignore it as it’s not that loud/hard, I suspect he is doing it to get a reaction/annoy and because I think going in and removing anything else or shouting is likely to escalate to an all out argument.

just wondering what approach others would take. As I’m at a bit of a loss other than ignoring him.

For context I suspect he has ASD, he can be quite an anxious kid so Sundays are often harder because of school the next day. He has recently stopped letting me sit and read with him each night that has removed our connection time before bed.

OP posts:
gamerchick · 10/12/2023 22:32

Eekmystro · 10/12/2023 22:21

I don’t think it’s a sensory thing. He does has sensory seeking behaviour, likes wrapping himself up in blankets tight, has a nightly bounce on his trampoline as his wind down. I don’t think the banging is a sensory thing though it feels more deliberate.

It is absolutely a sensory thing OP. Does he have a weighted blanket if he likes to wrap himself up tight?

All behaviour is communication. There will be something unsettling going on he's unable to process, never mind verbalise. Plus puberty will be happening soon. My youngest has ASD and went through a weird phase which turned out it was because there was strange hair growing on his body all of a sudden. Just one little thing he had to process and get used to. It was a fun table flipping phase.

Eekmystro · 10/12/2023 22:37

gamerchick · 10/12/2023 22:32

It is absolutely a sensory thing OP. Does he have a weighted blanket if he likes to wrap himself up tight?

All behaviour is communication. There will be something unsettling going on he's unable to process, never mind verbalise. Plus puberty will be happening soon. My youngest has ASD and went through a weird phase which turned out it was because there was strange hair growing on his body all of a sudden. Just one little thing he had to process and get used to. It was a fun table flipping phase.

He does have a weighted blanket, but doesn’t use it much. Prefers to wrap himself likes a sausage in his fleece.

oh yea I suppose this could be puberty related.

I assumed it wasn’t a sensory thing because it wasn’t like he was trying to get stimulation from it, and because I said “I’m angry and frustrated”. But maybe it was a useful way for him to let out his frustration, repetitively banging .

OP posts:
Bouncyball23 · 10/12/2023 23:04

TeenLifeMum · 10/12/2023 22:02

Okay, but he’s a child and you’re the adult so while I appreciate my dc are allowed privacy, they have to be respectful to the rest of the house and behave appropriately. Take charge! You added the grown up here so stop letting your dc call the shots.

Suspect asd clearly you have no idea how to deal with this situation.

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TeenLifeMum · 11/12/2023 09:07

@Bouncyball23 if you see my previous comment I suggested some techniques giving him options rather than dictating. The parent still needs to take charge - that doesn’t mean doing so in a demanding way. ASD children still need boundaries.

Eekmystro · 11/12/2023 14:13

Wee update. He woke up this morning and was still not right. I think it seems to centre arm round him not having done his home work like he usually does at the weekend. He’s doesn’t have a lot and he has until Thursday but he stresses about it a lot!

I’ve told him I’ll help him this evening plan how he will get it done. I mean it’ll take about 30 mins in total but I’d like to work with him to plan how he is going to feel better by getting the work done.
He initially refused to get dressed but luckily did after I pointed out this would leave him with another worry, being late for school, which he could avoid by getting ready.

OP posts:
Eekmystro · 11/12/2023 14:16

TeenLifeMum · 11/12/2023 09:07

@Bouncyball23 if you see my previous comment I suggested some techniques giving him options rather than dictating. The parent still needs to take charge - that doesn’t mean doing so in a demanding way. ASD children still need boundaries.

In all fairness though you didn’t suggest anything I hadn’t tried. So the “take charge” comment isn’t actually helpful. The rest was useful suggestions though.

OP posts:
Eekmystro · 11/12/2023 15:37

I’ll give that a read thanks.

OP posts:
Tighginn · 11/12/2023 15:41

Trauma response to something your not aware of?

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