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Is it possible to dial this back

6 replies

Christmasmishap · 10/12/2023 19:51

I was at a Christmas do last night (not work).

There's a man I've been friendly with there for about 2 years. Nice man and we have a bit of a connection as friends, but I've never seen him as anything else, mainly because until very recently he was married. Technically he's still married but they separated about 3 months ago.

I find this time of year really hard for various very sad reasons and I've also had some other stuff going on that meant going into the party I was either going to be miserable and leave early or throw myself into it.

I did the latter and got very very drunk, so did he. I always think you get to know someone when you drink with them and it turns out he's still a very nice guy.

We had such a good evening, chatted, danced.....and snogged, a lot until well into the early hours. Even at the time we were agreeing with each other that it was all ridiculous, he needs.time to be alone before getting into anything new etc, but we really were having a good time, getting on well and letting of steam. I don't regret it, I think it's what we both needed in that time and place, but it it can't go anywhere, for now, at least.

I'm not looking for a relationship and I know he needs some time anyway.

I'm pretty certain he initiated it all, he said he'd been thinking about kissing me for a while, whereas I can genuinely say the thought had never crossed my mind.

Anyway is it possible to leave this in a place where it met a need on the night and now we're just friends again, do you reckon?

OP posts:
swimsong · 10/12/2023 19:54

Yes, you can be friends after drunken snogging. You can say you have 'feelings' for him - but you're happy to shelve them for now.

alkinetyh · 10/12/2023 19:59

Sure. Just make that clear to him in a friendly way x

Christmasmishap · 10/12/2023 20:27

That's good, it does feel like it should possible, although I definitely seem to have feelings that weren't there before, all of a sudden.

OP posts:

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alkinetyh · 11/12/2023 06:29

Christmasmishap · 10/12/2023 20:27

That's good, it does feel like it should possible, although I definitely seem to have feelings that weren't there before, all of a sudden.

crush them! 😂

no good can come from an office romance!

Jewelanemone · 11/12/2023 06:34

alkinetyh · 11/12/2023 06:29

crush them! 😂

no good can come from an office romance!

OP said it wasn't a work do.

Christmasmishap · 11/12/2023 10:32

No it wasn't a work thing, we have no professional connections.

It might be worth exploring as a very light friends with a bit of sexual tension things for a while but neither he nor I are in a place for anything serious.

I'm undecided whether that makes the whole thing perfect or to be avoided at all costs 😆

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