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Original poster

I know I'm a prick ...

7 replies

Shithole101 · 03/12/2023 17:30

So I have been really struggling with my house work and actually keeping on top of it. MN posters have really helped me and i don't feel so over whelmed.

This probably sounds really petty but it's really pissed me of although it's kind of my fault. Although I'm getting there compared to a few weeks or so back it can take something small to set me back.

So ex has the younger kids every other weekend. He has them Friday to Sunday 5pm
They were there last weekend . He asked me if he could have them this weekend as he has an Xmas work thing, next weekend. So I said he could. But instead of taking them on the Friday he wanted to take them on Saturday and bring them back Sunday. And I said that was OK. So he got them at 10am Saturday and dropped them back 3pm today. What's pissed me of is he dropped them 2 hours earlier than normal plus only had them the 1 night. I know I'm probably in the wrong as he would not normally have them this weekend anyway. But as he's not having them next weekend it's messed up my cleaning thing I have going on so I was trying to sort it this weekend . But since he only had then the 1 night plus brang them back early it's really messed things up for me. And it feels like he's done it on his terms . But its also my fault for saying ok 😔

I know I'm being petty just ot takes small things to set me back .

OP posts:
samcartersg1 · 03/12/2023 17:35

Next time, say no. Or say that he can have them but not swap the weekends.

Original poster
Shithole101 · 03/12/2023 17:43

samcartersg1 · 03/12/2023 17:35

Next time, say no. Or say that he can have them but not swap the weekends.

Then the kids would have had to go 2 weeks without seeing him.

OP posts:
samcartersg1 · 03/12/2023 17:48

But that's the choices you have?

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Relationship problems
Jellycatspyjamas · 03/12/2023 17:51

I’m pretty flexible with my ex, it works for us both. If he wants to change weekends it’s the whole weekend unless otherwise agreed. You now know you need your time and space over the weekend you don’t have the kids, so don’t agree a shorter weekend. Sometimes it’s not until you’ve done it you realise it doesn’t work for you.

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 03/12/2023 17:55

If he swaps, then he swaps for whatever suits you, is if it suits you for it to by the whole weekend, then that is what you tell him.

Original poster
Shithole101 · 03/12/2023 18:15

Jellycatspyjamas · 03/12/2023 17:51

I’m pretty flexible with my ex, it works for us both. If he wants to change weekends it’s the whole weekend unless otherwise agreed. You now know you need your time and space over the weekend you don’t have the kids, so don’t agree a shorter weekend. Sometimes it’s not until you’ve done it you realise it doesn’t work for you.

Yeah I think that's what I have done. It didn't sink in at the time I just said OK. I think there's assumptions as well. Apprently I don't do anything so it doesn't matter . Like he dropped them at 3pm instead of 5 he does not even message me. Just assumes I'm home which to be honest I am. But he has absolutely no understanding of how much I struggle with the house and stuff. So he sees no issues of him dropping them back early.

OP posts:
Original poster
Shithole101 · 03/12/2023 18:17

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 03/12/2023 17:55

If he swaps, then he swaps for whatever suits you, is if it suits you for it to by the whole weekend, then that is what you tell him.

I definitely will next time.

OP posts:
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