Another thread about Work xmas do

[XmasCheeeer]

My colleagues are making little comments about me not going to the xmas party. I don't know if I should just ignore them or talk to the manager about it.

Basically I've only ever been to one. Worked at same company for 15 years. The party I went to was so awkward for me. I sat on my own and barely spoke to anyone. I don't drink and sat and watched as everyone got drunk and acted stupid. I didn't dance and during the meal I finished first and just sat in silence. I only spoke if someone talked to me first. Even then someone would shout over me and my voice would not be heard. If it's not obvious, I'm not a party person.

I can't bring myself to go to another one.

Colleagues are now bringing it up constantly. Asking me if I'm going, and why not and have I ever been? Saying why don't I like parties ? Saying I'm the only one not going. Then they look at me like I'm not normal as I really don't like parties. I heard two female colleagues whispering asking each other if I was going. Like it's such a big thing.

It's getting on my nerves now. Should I just grin and bear it till their party is over and hope they don't mention it afterwards?

I would just say clearly "I'm not going as it's not really my thing, hope you have lots of fun" and repeat. Be matter of fact about it rather than apologetic. Nobody should be making you feel bad for not going.

No. Just don’t go. They are overthinking your absence way too much for such minor event.

I said this exact thing and they looked at me like I had two heads !

“It’s against my religion” would shut it down.
Had a work colleague who used this for everything didn’t want to do. No one dared question him.

This is ridiculous, you can't be the only staff member in history to not go to the work's do?

Are you sure it's about you when they're whispering etc?

It doesn't make sense really.

Really? That's so strange.

I know it is ridiculous. Everyone pretty much goes except me. It's a big thing to them if someone doesn't go. One year someone broke their leg so didn't go and there were colleagues going up to them being really sympathetic. Not about his broken leg but the fact he will miss out on all the party fun

I've had simillar. They look at you gobsmacked for saying you're not going. I just smiled & walked away.

You're not going because you don't want to go. There's nothing wrong with that.

I get people making weird comments about me not drinking, they can't get their heads round it. I do go to the Christmas party but I stick to soft drinks. My former boss pointedly said she didn't trust anyone who didn't drink alcohol. I was weird, people who didn't drink were weird etc!

Anyway, she got completely plastered at the work Christmas do, got off with a bloke & ended up pregnant. He already had a wife and three kids so she ended up leaving the firm. He worked in the department upstairs so it was a bit awkward.

Say you already have a prior engagement and can't change your plans.

I’m the only one not going to ours. Love my job and get on extremely well with my colleagues but they know it’s just not my thing.

So next time just own it. Laugh and say I promise, it’s not you, it’s me!! I’m honestly the most boring person at parties for some reason.

There’s nothing odd about them having fun together either. My dd doesn’t drink and she often feels a bit like you on work parties too.

Brits as a nation have such a bonkers relationship with alcohol! Sorry your boss was such a knob.

Let them talk.

Some of them might be very quiet the day after the party and wished they hadn't got so drunk/snogged the boss/vomited!

Then you can ask them how the party went!