Past few years I have been dealing with alot of shit . Which was/is my dd going through DV, social services, and all the stuff that came with it. It was absolutely awful. She needed alot of support and help for her children, her owm mental heath and vulnerability. This mostly came down to me.
Also my son has had problems as well. He was extremely aggressive to me, violent smashing my house up , scaring my younger children, mind games. Self harming, suicide attempt, he has emotional dysregulation.
So I had a friend who has a child 18 months younger than my ds. They where friends because me and his mum were neighbours and known each other for about 22 years. So my ds 14, hers 12.5 ish. Are gaming together. Her son constantly swears over the top every other word. Friend kept getting onto me about lt and blaming my son. A few times I told me son not to play the games with him. Its not worth the hassle. Her son could do no wrong it was all petty crap.
But ds at some points was sending my friend really over the top messages they were mind game type messages, or anger,aggression, nasty , desperate, he said some pretty awful shit. I can't remember fully to explain it. Several times I told her to block him. But she would not. She just kept saying no.
He was not horrible to her son just to her . She told me my son was bullying her son. An example she gave was . Her son was studying something that's normally in older year groups. Her son told my DS and ds said to the friend "nah you lying show me your time table " she said this was bullying.
I was having her on my phone alot telling me to sort my son out etc etc to be honest I could not control what he was doing. Looking back it was probably the emotional disregulation but we did not know that at the time, so he felt he was getting the blame over everything mixed with teenage hormones.
So I have been dealing with all the above on my own. Both of us became distant from each other. Maybe 1 message every 6 months just 1 line. I just could not cope at the time I had to much going on with dd's stuff and ds stuff. I have been very on edge and I simply could not cope with what was going on. I was sick of hearing it. I could not do it. It was to much .
Recently this friend has made contact and she wants us to meet up. I'm not sure if its a good idea or not. Things have got better with DS. But we still have things to work on. The improvements are still very new. Mentally and emotionally I don't think myself or ds are 100% but we are getting there I don't want us to go backwards and I'm worried if I open up this friend ship with this person again it could set us back .