Nice activities or outings you've done with the kids that have turned into an absolute shitshow

[Silverstoat]

Bought the Hedgehog biscuit kit from Asda for a nice Sunday afternoon activity with the kids. Instead of a cookie cutter it's a hedgehog drawn on the inside of the box that you're supposed to cut out and use as a stencil 🤨 cue meltdowns from both dc as its impossible to cut out details in wet biscuit dough. Ds dropped a big piece of dough that was immediately gobbled up by ddog, I breathed in the icing powder and almost had an asthma attack, and then to top it all off they tasted like shit.

Panto never went down well with mine. Too hot, too loud, too crowded, and as they got older too embarrassing.

On the other hand, a trip to the carwash was (and still is, even with teens) always a guaranteed success

Visit to national trust property in October. Arrived only to find out cafe was closed so turned back to nearest village for Co op meal deals. Returned, got out of car, dogs lead snaps almost instantly. DP drives off with dog to nearest animal supply shop 15 minutes away, I take kids for lawn picnic but it starts raining so I have to take them inside the Manor House which is full of beautiful antiques and tables staged for dinner with glass tableware. Got stuck chatting to a lovely elderly man working there about the history of the house, trying to be polite while also watching DD like a hawk around all the valuables and hissing at her to be careful. I mention to the bloke about the dog lead and he says casually ‘Oh we sell leads in the gift shop’ WHAT. We make it round the one way system and out the house, DP has returned and we go for a blustery and very muddy walk around the grounds. It rains again so we give up and head home. DD has the mother of all tantrums because she doesn’t want to leave and I end up losing my cool and practically wrestling her into the car seat as the baby joins in the crying. We drive home in silence and I actually cry most of the way. It’s funny looking back now but WASNT at the time.

Going through the baboon enclosure at a safari park. Big mistake, huge. 2 adults shouting, 2 kids crying, 1 kid also shouting. Hell on earth!

Boat trip to see the dolphins, 1 child sick, 1 toddler trying to run around, worse 2 hours of my life.

Those two stick out for this year! 🤣

@Hellocatshome

I remember being distraught at being given a colouring book from Santa when I was about 5yo. Dm thought I was being really ungrateful, but actually I was very disappointed in Santa. We had huge numbers of colouring books at home, and I wasn't that keen on them anyway, and being magic he should have known that I didn't want another.
The funny thing was (looking back) is that I'd seen all the other children coming out with their colouring books and was hugging myself with the knowledge that he wouldn't give me one because he knew better...

Is that the one in the Cotswolds? We went there and it was a disaster as unbeknown to us DS was actually pretty unwell with a nasty skin condition but kept stripping off on one of the hottest days of the year, but refused to get off the play area. Some American tourists probably think all British toddlers play half naked on outdoor equipment.

Library is often a disaster here, I don’t know what DS thinks you do in libraries but choosing books isn’t one of them

When DS2 was 3 my mum took us on holiday to Disney in Paris. DS decided that he hated all rides and was terrified of everything. He just wouldn’t go on anything. DS and I ended up spending a lot of time wandering around and waiting for other people who were going on rides.

Which you're not going to share?

Took my youngest to a local farm. She cried at almost every animal. Wouldn't go near the ones who were too smelly and had a meltdown when she realised there were loose chickens roaming around one area. We only really looked at two very cute small pigs (with some large personalities). We spent more time in the play area outside the exit than in the actual farm.

Mine also love the car wash to an unreasonable level. I had to persuade (bribe) ds2 to go to school one day when something was a huge problem in his 7 yr old mind, all it took was a musing about visiting the car wash after school ..obviously only those that had actually gone to school would be in the car to enjoy it…and he put his shoes on like grease lightening!

We have had many, many unmitigated disasters on family outings. I think I have just blocked the details out

Last year we decided to get up really early and head to Edinburgh for the day to look around the Christmas market (2 and a half hour drive)

All was fine until we got there and it started to snow. We soon discovered both the children's boots were NOT waterproof and their poor feet were soon soaking and freezing. So we had to do am emergency dash to buy new boots and socks. Then actually trying to LOOK at the market was a nightmare as it was so busy, slushy muddy puddles everywhere, scared of losing a child, huge queues to get food or drink.

Thought we would find a cafe or pub for lunch but everywhere was packed, not knowing the area well we had no idea where we might be likely to get a table. Children getting more and more upset and hangry. We decided to head back to the car and got an Asda meal deal on the way. Won't be back in a hurry!

We went for a lovely walk on a sunny day with DD on her bike. At the farthest point of the walk, she fell off and grazed her elbow a tiny bit. She screamed, wouldn't get back on her bike and wouldn't walk, so DH had to carry her all the way back, screaming in his ear all the way, while I carried the (very heavy) bike. Of course the path went through the middle of a golf course, and the golfers had a good laugh at our expense. Bastards.

Sorry it was a mumsnet thread, I'll have a look for it!

Took 1 child, 2 toddlers with bikes/balance bikes and big picnic, water bottles to forest for picnic and ride on a hot day. 2 punctures and 1 refusal to ride/push, tantrums, getting back to the car with 6 wheels being pushed/carried, 2 on reins and a picnic bag was terrible.

Paid for an expensive "medieval " firework display and bonfire. Very wet, too busy and loud for kids. The lighting of the fire was supposed to be a flaming arrow fired at it. It missed. Many times. Fire took ages to light, fireworks way too long to wait for, took half hour or more to get off the site due to traffic and mud with bored, overtired children. Appalling waste of money.

The one that is branded into my brain from >20 years ago involved a 30 min drive to a lovely forest park complete with fab playground. It was a chilly day, but the weather turned horrible, with horizontal freezing rain. This did not deter DCs 1 and 2 from hurling themselves around on the equipment like loons and not wanting to leave. DC1, then aged 4, was behaving in a thoroughly feral fashion and DC2, aged 2, kept doing stupid things and getting covered in mud etc. And I was unable to intervene properly, as DC3, aged about 8 months, decided that the rain was horrid and the only thing that would make it better was to breastfeed.

I therefore had a howling icy gale blowing into my shirt and across my boobs, and a wet arse from having to sit on a wet bench - DC3 weighed a bloody ton and there is a limit to how long you can BF a 20lb monster while standing). As soon as I could, I prised DC3 off the (frozen) tit. I have a vague memory of getting them all back in the car, DC1 behaving as though on acid with all the excitement, DC2 muddy, cold and cross, and DC3 grumpy about being deprived of boob.

It should have been a lovely if rather cold outing. It turned into some sort of hazing.

Booked a "magical" Santa experience at local theme park an hour's drive away. It was DC2's birthday as well so I thought it would be extra special. There was a train ride through the park to Santa's grotto. I should have realised this wouldn't go well when we had to queue for ages to even get on the train. Then at the other end was a walk through the (very long) decorated grotto to get to Santa. Except we couldn't walk through as the massive queue continued all the way through the grotto, so we inched up and down and around very slowly with two bored, tired and confused small children. It took forever. When we got to Santa there were 3 Santas in separate flimsy portacabins. We went in to see our Santa and the DC were absolutely terrified of him, they shot straight into the furthest corner of the room and wouldn't say a word to Santa. Santa was clearly also tired and frustrated so we left pretty quickly...it was a complete letdown. I had had such high hopes for the day and looked forward to it so much, it was really crushing at the time although I did chalk it up to experience in the end. The DCs don't remember it at all, they were too young I suppose.

Ice skating where DD was scared she'd fall and cried, we ended up spending more time sat in the cafe with chips, then I got locked in the toilet and she had to find a staff member who got me out by telling me to stand on the seat as she kicked the lock in. It was a memorable day but not one we repeated!

Some of these are hilarious!
I remember going to an otter sanctuary in Derbyshire when DD was a baby. We couldn't even get her pram through the turnstile and had to carry her all the way round.

Took first darling child to first every panto...she would have been 2 I think. Bought tickets for us and adoring grandparents. Sat in our seats in front of the empty stage. Lights went out, total darkness, music played, fairy appeared out of nowhere on the stage (walked on in the darkness and then had a big spotlight on her). Child screamed absolutely terrified and wouldn't stop crying. We all left. Very expensive 5 mins at childs first panto (she's 18 now, no obvious trauma from the whole experience) 😂

@timtam23 not Gullivers World by any chance? Sounds all too familiar!

Cinemas went to see trolls in 3d my little boy had a meltdown because it wasn’t ‘3d enough’ started crying folded his arms and turned the other way and refused to watch and said he wanted to go home also been a few times took him the fair which he hated he was scared of the rides and sea gulls

One year for DS's birthday when he was 4 or 5 we had a lovely day out, big park with playground in the sunshine, got icecream, went to cinema - DH wanted to watch untilt the end of the credits for a post-credits sequence (there wasn't one). DS cried the whole way back that it been a terrible awful day because dad wanted to watch the end credits.

DH got quite annoyed but I explained to him small kids can just be like that and not to hold it against him,

My three youngest children, then aged 10, 12 and 14, were fully on board with the idea of a holiday in the middle of nowhere in December and were like, "Oh, yes, we'd LOVE that!" when I suggested hiring mountain bikes in advance for them so that we could all ride on the trails shown on the map around the area. Of course, the hired bikes turned out to be heaps of scrap, the trails were mud baths through fields of cattle, and there were millions of stiles and gates. We got around half a mile along the way before the children collectively declared they'd had enough, which is probably the only time in their lives all three of them have agreed on anything. I have a cartoon image in my head of DH and me dragging three large wailing children and five bicycles back to the house.

The rest of the holiday was without mishap, thankfully.

Trip to the funfair. Child finally persuaded to try the dodgems. In the first few seconds of the ride starting they were bumped into the side and she flew forward hitting her head on the steering wheel (despite having the seat belt on). Epic tears and hasn't wanted to go on a ride since.

A 'fun run'. Child got explosive diarrhoea and had to be taken home by father whilst mother (me) was doing a longer run. Got back to no welcome party and had to hitch a lift back home with a randomer!

A safari park bus ride through the lions/wolves etc. no toilet on the bus. Friend's kid becomes desperate for the loo and has to wee in a bottle.

So so many!!!! Why do we even bother!! 😂

@zebrapig great guess! Only tried the Santa special once, never again!

We did that last year. Spent £8 on the light up thingy.
Skipped it this year...