ASD traits but not ASD?

[Antoniabantera]

I was talking to a mum the other day who shared her story of moving house when her second son was born and the oldest DS changed schools. She said that the school suggested that her first DS had ASD (don't know the full details). He was 6 at the time. She went to to say they were really shocked at the time but then it turned out he didn't have ASD, he was just not coping well with the new school, new baby brother and moving house. I don't know her DS very well but he's in Y6 now, going to secondary in Sept 2024 and as far as I'm aware doing fine.

I have some signs that DD (also 6) may have ASD, school can see a few traits too, but she is fine with everything, always been a very typical child.

Would like to know from other's experiences if there is such a thing such as ASD traits but not ASD? Are there environmental factors that make a typical child behave atipically?

Yes you can have neurodiverse traits but not meet the threshold for diagnosis, either because of severity of said traits or (for asd) because you don't show neurodiversity across the triad.

Equally you get people who can mask for a long time but eventually are diagnosed. My son was like this. At 3 he had asd traits, by 5 many of these had "disappeared" (ie he learnt to mask). He was diagnosed at 14 and now appears far more autistic than previously as he feels able to let it show.

Trauma can present similarly to ASD.

@DisquietintheRanks interesting. I hope your DS is thriving.

I do think though that most teens struggle anyway, whether ND or NT?

Yes.
When ds had his assessment for ASD at the end they said he was right at the borderline of diagnosis, so we'd either be given a diagnosis of "ASD" or "NT with ASD traits".
As it happened we got the former, which I was relieved about.

Also be aware that with girls they are more likely to mask and can present differently to boys too.

I would say my DH has ASD traits, but he does not have ASD. Sometimes we even joke that he is acting more autistic than the autistic people in the house.

Everyone in my household shares similar personality traits that make us different from the mainstream. Dd and I both cross over that line into ASD, but DH doesn’t have the element of getting overwhelmed and just starting to shut down. He also doesn’t have any anxiety that comes from being different and trying to operate in a world built for the NT.

If it's a girl, she won't fit the criteria like a boy will because the diagnostic criteria is based on research solely on boys. Look into specific info about girls with high functioning ASD and you'll see what I mean. There's another recent thread on here about being diagnosed later in life and you'll find lots of examples of what it was like to be ASD as a female growing up. This is a lot more common than one would think.

Yes the teenager years are tough. But if you are blind or have impaired mobility or asd you will have all the normal difficulties plus additional challenges due to your disability.

Lots of people have traits but arent autistic. They might only have traits in one area of the three areas they tend look at when diagnosing.

And lots of things like anxiety, attatchment disorder, dyslexia, adhd development delays etc can look very similar to asd.

Thats not to say that it isnt also very often asd.