If you're socially satisfied how often do you see friends?

[WhoNeedsFriends]

I feel socially inadequate because of my boyfriends social life. He has two groups of friends, one that he sees once a week and another that he sees twice a week.

I don't have any friends that I see that regularly. I see friends maybe once a fortnight but usually that will be with their and my kids. I have lots of friends but they are all individual friends that I've met in various places so I don't really meet friends as a group. I definitely would like to see friends more but I can't imagine having friendships where I would see them every week. Maybe that would be different if I was in a group.

I guess I'm wondering if my social life is the norm or if his is. Maybe we are both at abnormal and the norm is more in the middle. Not sure.

If you're socially satisfied how often do you see your friends?

Usually have dinner with girl friends once every couple of weeks. Coffee / lunch or an exhibition most weeks with friends, out with other couples once or twice a month and ad hoc dog walks with friends a couple of times a week. Also work 4 days and have kids at home, teens

I see school mum friends most days but, not in a social way all the time- it’s more that we see each other on the school run and have a quick chat, occasional coffee, night out once or twice a year.

My close friend I see monthly but chat via text mostly weekly but often daily dependant on what’s going on in our lives!

Other good friends I catch up with via text most months and manage to meet 3 or 4 times a year.

Our neighbours are out or away with friends every single weekend and often a few days in the week. They more often than not don’t have their kids with them so, they rely on babysitters or family to look after them to allow this.
Personally I think it’s a bit odd and excessive and feel sorry for the kids being dumped all the time. Not to mention the money they must spend.
At times I feel a tad envious but, then when I look closer at their relationship I don’t actually think it’s the healthiest and have heard from the horses mouth that they’re having problems so, I wonder if their social life is masking what’s really going on! One for sure (if not both) definitely has a drink problem.

From what I see in people who have crazy busy social lives; they seem to be unable to enjoy their own company and suffer with FOMO! They need to have all these friends to validate themselves. That in itself is a concern in my eyes.

A couple of times a week but that is bacause of a hobby and a group of us stay for a drink and chat after. Other friends every 2 months or so for night out evening in.

I have casual friends I see once a week at our knitting group, which is where I met them. I like them all but that's plenty for me, I don't think we have enough in common to sustain more contact. At this level, I look forward to our weekly meetings.

Yes, not a knitting group for me, but I have groups of people who I see each week as we all attend the same activity. I enjoy their company. In the same way others have said they will chat with, and be friendly with colleagues, or other parents at school. Life is richer for seeing people, having a chat, knowing someone cares and would miss you if you aren't there, or just having a laugh together, or helping each other out - even with snippets of information.
It is difficult to say when "people you see regularly and are 'friendly' with" become "friends". But I'd say that is the same with a group you go out with- some are friends 'of a time' and the odd one might be someone you form a deeper, longer lasting friendship with.

There is a difference between seeing people when you are out....... going 'out' ......... and then going 'out, out'

I have work friends who I see twice a week (cos I wfh three days a week), but we message a lot in the week. Then I have individual friends. One from school - see her 2-3 times a year. One from my undergraduate degree - It varies how much I see her but no more than once every two months, but we message every couple of days. Another from Uni but more recently when I went back - we message weekly and see each other 2-3 times a year.

I guess to many people that sounds a bit rubbish but I’m happy with it. Can’t stand being too social it’s very tiring.

My DH is the same and makes me feel inadequate!
I have a handful of close friends who I text occasionally and see maybe once a month for coffee or lunch etc. Guess it's just down to what works for you. I've tried to stop comparing myself now.

Make the group yourself.

If you love friend a why would they not like to meet friend b?

Once every few months. Otherwise Whatsapp suffices for live updates. Happy with this. (45 with DC)

I go to a hobby group once a week. I see my other two best friends maybe once a fortnight or a month if we're busy. I have regular contact with distance friends online. There are a couple of people I see every few months.

I used to see friends a lot more when I was single. I'm in a couple now so less. We see a couple of sets of friends as a couple though

Oh God, not very often. And it's not for lack of enjoying each other's company, it's just a lot of life to manage between catch ups and enough history that perhaps we take each other for granted a little bit? A couple of times a week would be ridiculous.

Sometimes we see each other 4/5 times a month. Sometimes more, sometimes less, it just depends what's going on. We're been friends for years (5 of us), so we kind of go with the flow. We all have jobs and families so we understand that we're all busy

Probably have a Saturday night out every other weekend, the odd catch up for food and/or drinks and we have WhatsApp chat groups inbetween

Last time we had a big night out was 16th Dec for pre Christmas and we’re all out on 30th for pre NYE.

It feels like someone should be grouping these by age group. It seems like there might be a bottoming out in the forties. I wonder if there is a fifties resurgence?

I’m in my 50’s and go out more now than I have in decades but that’s because my friends and I have now all got adult kids so can please ourselves a lot of easier.

This is good to know. Just six years to go!

Closest friends, once or twice a week. Others every month or so. Weekly phone contact with most.

I have about 7 longstanding friends that i see individually maybe two or three times per year. Also some newer friends that i might get together with once or twice a year. Outside of that i have lots of work ‘friends’ that i chat to and catch up with, i’ve always wanted a circle of friends but never managed to sustain it out of my teens.

Like @SamW98 that is definitely the case for me and my friends.

Teens and 20s - footloose and fancy free - able to do what you want, when you want, spontaneously.
30s and 40s - have to co-ordinate with dh and getting babysitters as well as working round dcs' activities and also just not having the emotional energy, or the funds for a night out. On top of which, those times have to tie in wth your friends being able to arrange sitters or a night when their partner is able to have the dc.
50s and 60s - social life picks up again as you can become spontaneous again, or at least pop something in the diary without having to co-ordinate with anyone else in the family. Money also becomes a bit easier as both your salary reflects being at the top of your career, and potentially your mortgage is paid off, or really reduced as you can see the end in sight.

Yes, a generalisation, but I bet a lot see a similar pattern.

Closest friends- minimum once a week and we go on holiday together and spend important events together (Christmas, NYE, birthdays etc).
Other friends every couple of months but we message regularly.