I know margarine is the devil's jizz but I'm poor and it's either that or lard.
Everytime I go to spread margarine on a piece of bread or toast, instead of sticking to the knife it glides across the surface then plops off the end of the bread onto the plate. It then can't be picked up for love nor money and I end up in a sticky, oily mess. Wtf Utterly Butterly?