This place is negative!

[whitesnoww]

I have been on here for a week and what I know is:

People on here are so negative and toxic.

Any nice comments are met with constant backlash. It's draining.

Just be happy.

I've been here years, and i'd say its a bit like life - some happy bits, some supportive bits, some shitty bits and the odd barney or two!

I've never looked on the AIBU board because I think if you have to ask the answer is probably yes? Perhaps, I might be wrong I shall have a look now. How bad can it be?

I totally agree too with@SummerHouse and @amicissimma

Well said you both nailed it on the head.!

I’ve been here eleven years and I do believe it’s a lot more combative than it used to be. There was always robust debates, but it’s the pile ons on threads that are entirely benign that I think gives the toxic vibe. The first reply sets the tone.

Sometimes the unpleasant, rude brigade mistake other topics for AIBU and start on posters that don't expect it as they didn't post in AIBU. Although I do think they just like being goady arseholes regardless of where they post. They find a post in trending or active and don't check the topic.

Same as all the posts in Style & Beauty where people don't realise they are posting there and slag off posters wanting nice bags because they only pay £5.00 for a plastic handbag and keep it their entire life.

There are some really nice people on here, in among all the 'others'.

Yeah. But it's also absolutely fucking hilarious at times.

Head you off to classics, gin in hand, and let out a tinkly laugh.

I'm not going there again!

Not always. I've had great advice on here.

Years ago my ex nearly bankrupted me and the advice on here saved me.

Same as everywhere, there will always be twats. Generally though I've had support when I have needed it. And been told when I am wrong.

Parking threads are the best

Original.

I thought NetMums shut?

In agree there is some excellent advice to be had on MN. Which is why many of us stay.

I don't think Netmums shut, just very very little traffic.

There was another site that started which did close down a couple of years or so back.

Just had a look and Netmums still seems to be there.

Which topics are good to block?

AIBU, Conflict in the Middle East (I just can't), and unfortunately Relationships has a lot of threads on domestic abuse, divorces, cheating.

It's helpful people there to get some support at the same time but being exposed to it all the time warps your perception that it's all there is.

As much as there are bad men over there, I'd like to believe there are some good ones, too.

Gardening and Litter Tray are good.

I've had loads of help about dairy intolerance for DS and I too was on tenterhooks waiting for Jesus to open a jar and also the disrobing of angry Santa cactus. There's alot of shittiness, round the aibu section mainly, but there's a hell of alot of really great people here too😁

Go through the list and block anything you aren't interested in first. Then when you are browsing, do it from Trending at the side of the page, or Active, if you come across topics you aren't keen on, block them.

There are some really goady posters on AIBU but if you block the topic you will also miss some amusing and useful things too.

Great representation of the site in the face of criticism.

I’ve noticed a lot of attacking each other on threads, for voicing a differing opinion, I read one poster being attacked yesterday and trying to bow out and the attacker responded with “I don’t like your attitude” .

another thread about neighbours complaining about noise and the op was rudely attacking any one who disagreed with her. Calling them sad sacks and the like.

i get it says more about the posters, but am a little dismayed by it. There are threads I’d like to have contributed to, but once I see folks just attacking each other, having pile ons, I just shut it down and move on.

I have seen and been on far worse negative websites. The only thing I find is a bit off is "parallel talking".

Even if someone will post something funny ams lighthearted, and many posters will reply, I haven't seen them engaged with each other.

A little bit yes, but I've been here a while and it just doesnt go on and turn into a friendship of sorts, other than perhaps people on Tell Me All About Your Calm and Mundane Day thread (an actual thread name)

For me, the worst part is indifference more than negativity. I have seen so many posters log on, state their opinion and advice, don't interact with others and log off.

MN is a very good and invaluable site with a lot of wise Vipers on here, yet even I wonder what's the point of participating in an online community where people seldom seem to make friends with each other

That's a bit that's not negative just empty and pointless.

If I'm wrong, I'd love to be corrected and pointed out where this friendships happen.

So for me, it's not negativity that's bad on here, it's indifference.

The good far outweighs the bad. I've found great ideas and avoided many mistakes when we were refurbing, the TV and read along type threads are fun, when the chips are really down for someone there is often a lot of kindness, there's great support and good advice on many topics. Just steer clear of the assholes and it is a great place to be.