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Original poster

I know I'm being horrible

32 replies

Toothteeth23 · 10/11/2023 22:58

I know I'm being horrible when I say this . But I'm feeling selfish. My 2 youngest go to their dad's every other weekend sleep for 2 nights . Every night around 10pm they video call me. It sounds awful but it's annoying.. I don't get much time to myself as I have other children who have mental health issues and other difficulties. I don't get to do simple things such as watch TV. So I go to bed around 10pm settle myself in bed and watch TV. I only have a basic TV in my room so I can't pause rewind etc and the 2 youngest always call me just as I settle to watch something. They don't have anything to say they are just making noise and silly sounds . I ask them what they have been up to . But that takes 20 seconds then it's just faces and sounds they are only 7&8 I love them to bits but sometimes I want time on my own. I asked if they ask to call me and they said no daddy tells us to. But i also can't tell them not to. That would be awful

OP posts:
OhpoorMe · 11/11/2023 09:44

My 7&8 year old do not have an understanding of time.

What? Do they have additional needs?

Original poster
Toothteeth23 · 11/11/2023 10:25

OhpoorMe · 11/11/2023 09:44

My 7&8 year old do not have an understanding of time.

What? Do they have additional needs?

One has autism and learning difficulties. The other does not but still no concept of time

OP posts:
Original poster
Toothteeth23 · 11/11/2023 10:27

Hes definitely not checking up on me. I have other kids with me anyway. And I never go out he knows that anyway. I only hew definitely not checking up on me.

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NealBrose · 11/11/2023 10:31

What @GreyCarpet said. I think this is a means of checking up on you/controlling what you're doing.

Preemptive call to say night night at 7.30 might work better. If you've generally been in bed, the kids will happily believe that 10pm is too late for you.

NealBrose · 11/11/2023 10:34

X post, sorry @Toothteeth23

If he's not checking up then he's just being inconsiderate. Ask for it to be earlier, explain to your kids beforehand that you'll be in bed at 10 and that you're calling at whatever time and stick with it. They might get one call you don't answer, but you will have explained and can explain again when you see them.

IncompleteSenten · 11/11/2023 10:35

You won't be hurting their feelings by having your ex move the time to 7pm.

Tell him. Hell, text him at 5 to and remind him at first.

If he won't make this change then think again about his motivation. Perhaps you are giving him too much benefit of the doubt.

Original poster
Toothteeth23 · 11/11/2023 10:55

NealBrose · 11/11/2023 10:34

X post, sorry @Toothteeth23

If he's not checking up then he's just being inconsiderate. Ask for it to be earlier, explain to your kids beforehand that you'll be in bed at 10 and that you're calling at whatever time and stick with it. They might get one call you don't answer, but you will have explained and can explain again when you see them.

Yeah thats true. I will tell him to ask the boys to call me any time before 8.30

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