Class dynamics in primary school

[BlackForestHotChocolate]

My child has a great first 4 years of school. It’s a one form entry school in a small town and only 7 girls in her class. Since moving up to the next year she has had consistent problems, mainly with one girl making her tile at school miserable.

Obviously I only hear one side but it’s pretty much along the lines of She gives her dirty looks

Posted too soon! So along the lines of constant dirty looks, deciding if my daughter can take part in playground games at lunch, telling a boy to hit her, which he has done, chats about her to other class mates in the toilets knowing she is in there and can over hear. Recently lots of the class went out trick or treating, we live on a big estate where lots of houses participate and the other girl told her she had better not see her out and about or she is done for. All this sort of shit that I don’t think anyone should have to deal with at this age.

I have emailed the teacher today explaining outside and not naming names. I haven’t heard back yet but this child is making my daughter so miserable. Bit by bit her lovely sunny demeanour is being chipped away at day by day. Would I be unreasonable to ask for a meeting with the teacher and advise her that my daughter is being bullied? It is bullying isn’t it? Today my daughter was sat in the lunch hall at a table and the other girl realised she was sitting on The same table as my daughter and got up and moved away with another girl saying they won’t sit near her as she’s disgusting.

im at a loss and so heartbroken with it.

I should add my daughter is adamant she doesn’t want me to speak with the teacher, she would rather I speak with the mum but I’m reticent to do that.

OP I had a situation with my son last year but I was slow to report it and make a drama. Then the kid hurt my son and I had to go in to discuss it. The teachers were surprised at some of the things i told them and kept telling me I should have reported sooner. I felt like a really shit parent for not addressing it sooner. There were things my son hadn't told me either that didn't come to light until the incident so in my defence I was a bit in the dark too. So my advice is report it ASAP in a reasonable way.

Don't speak to the mum about stuff outside of school. And for stuff outside school encourage DD to stick up for herself in an appropriate way

Thank you @Alalalalalongalalalalalonglonglilong . Did speaking with the school about it make it worse for your son? I hope he’s doing okay now.

I don’t want to be causing drama but I feel my daughter needs some help. As I say I do only hear one side but what I am hearing makes me feel a mixture of sadness and anger.

Thanks again for the advice.

@anonimoxyz I will go via the school and not the parent. To be fair the mum seems lovely, I’m not sure why it’s all deteriorated so much.

Definitely trying to tell her it’s ok to stick up for herself. It’s hard though, to be fair I’m not that great at it now.

The school addressed it with the other kid and presumably his parents. I don't know exactly what went on but the kid mostly stays away from my son now. They keep them separate as best they can. The new teacher this year was briefed and I suppose is more vigilant and pulling up this other kid on little things so it doesn't escalate. A group of kids with this kid as ring leader had started doing Ding dong ditch on the way to school as we leave very near and when I mentioned this to the school they said i should have told them sooner. It didn't occur to me to report something that occurred outside school and when I said that they told me it was all part of the same issue and they would rather be fully informed.

@BlackForestHotChocolate same! I'm rubbish at sticking up for myself 😕 Do believe school stuff stays in school tho! If school have dealt with parents can relax