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Original poster

IOU from Santa is 5 to young

93 replies

SparksFly90 · 06/11/2023 22:10

On a number of occasions I have asked DD (5). What they want for Xmas and the only 2 answer I get is barbie dream house which is way to big and she wants to go back to Ibiza last abroad holiday in 2022.
In our house you each get a present from Santa which is wrapped in red and the other presents are from us or friends and family. I already have main present from us a Furby.
So my question is from Santa do I get her something I think she would like or do I create her an IOU of a holiday for 2024. I would like to try somewhere different to 2022, but will be standard all inclusive holiday.
Any other ideas will be greatly revived, for context she already has loads of Lego, barbies and a smaller house ,sylvanian, doll and gneration doll, bike (pedal and balance) scooter etc.
Thanks

OP posts:
Idratherbepaddleboarding · 07/11/2023 15:38

5 year olds aren’t really able to understand delayed gratification, but the trick is at 5, you decide what you want to buy her and bring it up in conversation every so often until she decides it’s what she wants! So if it’s a smaller Barbie house for example, show her in a catalogue, maybe accidentally come across a you tube video about it. Works every time…

BabyofMine · 07/11/2023 15:42

Not only is a family holiday not a gift for the child, but she’s asking to go to Ibiza and you’ve said you’re wanting to go somewhere else so it’s not even where she wants to go!! 😂🙈

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dylanschicken · 07/11/2023 18:18

Sartre · 07/11/2023 14:44

Why can’t you gift a child a holiday? Are people really so entitled they think a holiday is just something everyone does anyway so can’t be packaged as a gift? Ridiculous. Holidays most often cost thousands of pounds so definitely can be a present, an extremely expensive one! My DS turned 13 this year and his main gift was a trip abroad, he was thrilled with it.

I would wrap up something related to the place you’re going and some fun things like a swim float if it’s that sort of a trip. Of course a holiday can be a present, it‘s a luxury.

You can't give a 5 year old their place on a family holiday as a Christmas present.

aSofaNearYou · 07/11/2023 19:33

I wouldn't give a holiday from Santa as it's too lavish and sends expectations sky high. Personally I would talk to her about the barbie house being too big to ask Santa for and what else she could ask for.

Wolvesart · 07/11/2023 19:39

I think the idea of a gift she could use on hols is quite a good one.

Puzzled by the Lego - surely you mean Duplo. I know the Friends sets are simple, but before 6 Lego is just too much

Kitkat1523 · 07/11/2023 19:45

no that’s Completely wrong for a 5 year old

BlazingWorld · 07/11/2023 19:49

Wolvesart · 07/11/2023 19:39

I think the idea of a gift she could use on hols is quite a good one.

Puzzled by the Lego - surely you mean Duplo. I know the Friends sets are simple, but before 6 Lego is just too much

Not at all! DS had a bucket of Lego when he was four, it was a godsend as it was the first thing that kept him in his bedroom when he woke up at ridiculous o’clock instead of coming into us, and by six he was definitely building sets.

Badatthis · 07/11/2023 19:55

Wolvesart · 07/11/2023 19:39

I think the idea of a gift she could use on hols is quite a good one.

Puzzled by the Lego - surely you mean Duplo. I know the Friends sets are simple, but before 6 Lego is just too much

My DS has happily sat making Lego models from.his sisters Lego from 3. Ignored the duplo!

LoveBluey · 07/11/2023 22:37

Lego is totally suitable for under 6s. I have a 6.5 year old and she's had proper Lego since at least 4, probably before that if I recall. She can now complete lots of the city and friends sets herself but before that the mixed sets of bricks to create your own are perfect for imaginative play.

Original poster
SparksFly90 · 07/11/2023 22:41

Thankyou everyone for your messages. I guess the IOU is not fair. I just feel it’s difficult to find the right balance between giving child a magical Christmas and not spoiling them.
I will not buy the dream house as it is too big and bulky and unnecessary clutter for the home rather than the cost. In regards to just buy her stuff I do not agree with this, I don’t want to waste money just so she has something to open on the day. After all with Santa’s present, our present and gifts from family and friends it goes on for days. Especially when I know it will end up in the loft by Easter. I much rather her have memories, hence I like the idea of items such as swim suit for her holiday. She will have the standard books, board game, stocking fillers. I guess my solution will be to gift the Furby from Santa and get other stuff from us. As someone mentioned kids talk at school and don’t want her to show off how much she had from Santa, hence the one from him and the others from us, always different paper and different location to identify.

OP posts:
InTheRainOnATrain · 07/11/2023 22:48

Wolvesart · 07/11/2023 19:39

I think the idea of a gift she could use on hols is quite a good one.

Puzzled by the Lego - surely you mean Duplo. I know the Friends sets are simple, but before 6 Lego is just too much

No, duplo is for toddlers. The youngest lego sets are sold as 4+ but an enthusiastic 5YO could easily manage a 6+ one, especially with a parent on board to help.

Wotsitfappe · 07/11/2023 23:06

Wolvesart · 07/11/2023 19:39

I think the idea of a gift she could use on hols is quite a good one.

Puzzled by the Lego - surely you mean Duplo. I know the Friends sets are simple, but before 6 Lego is just too much

Of course lego isn't too much for under 6!

Annahh · 07/11/2023 23:13

dylanschicken · 06/11/2023 22:39

I'm sorry but you don't give a 5 year old a holiday for Christmas. Buy some presents.

Your family AI holiday isn't her present Sad

This

redalex261 · 07/11/2023 23:54

A five year old will not understand the concept of an IOU. They mostly can’t fathom waiting a few hours/days for an anticipated treat let alone waiting for Christmas, then getting up to news of a further wait! Buy her a Santa present you think she will like, SH Barbie house is good option, if not available something more sturdy (they are flimsy as hell). Too young to understand money/value so no need to explain any expenditure restrictions due to holiday budget! Meantime, appreciate the ease of age five gift giving; at age 16 it’s Apple all the way!😩

Insuranceheadache · 08/11/2023 06:37

just feel it’s difficult to find the right balance between giving child a magical Christmas and not spoiling them

I don’t think people are suggesting you’d be spoiling her, quite the opposite.

LoneFemaleTraveller · 08/11/2023 06:42

I dont think you need to worry about her being spoilt or having a magical christmas.

iou and a swimsuit? 🙄

if you do not want your child to ask for a gift, dont have them write a christmas list. She has asked for one present and you dont agree with it? that is just cruel.

OneMoreStepAlongTheRoadIGo · 08/11/2023 06:45

No you can't give a holiday to a 5 year old for Christmas. Do you understand 5 year olds?

It's when Christmas still is magical and absolutely get her some things to open and play with. They grow out of toys eventually so great to get her some age appropiate things now. Maybe look second hand for some barbie bits and pieces if money is the issue?

A 5 year old is not able to think that far into the future and I am feeling a little sorry for them that you aren't able to do a gift from santander. Even if you modify expectations ("santander can't bring the dream house as our house is too small for it - but let's look at some other barbie bits!") I'd size really is the issue.

5 year olds (and most children) are vey much in the here and now. And presents are fun and exciting. Spoiling would be prese ts every week just because. But some chosen presents at Christmas is definitely not spoiling.

Please don't give a holiday to a you g child. Don't make a holiday dependant on santander or the child's wish (too much pressure) but make it independent. If need be you and your partner can gift the holiday to each other if you want to save pennies but please don't link with your childs Christmas. That's really not going to be emotionally healthy.

Mrsjayy · 08/11/2023 06:47

buy her a .blooming dream house ! you are not taking her on holiday you are going on holiday.

Mrsjayy · 08/11/2023 06:54

that's a shame you think a toy is too big and untidy for your house.

marangu · 08/11/2023 07:00

Don't ask a 5 year old what they want for Christmas if you are highly unlikely to get it ( anything they ask for is likely to be bright and bulky) .... you are setting them up for unnecessary disappointment

I would get the Barbie house personally - ours got 6 years use, before then we cleaned it up and gifted it to charity. I would say say something different if you suggested it was too expensive .. but sounds like cost is not driving the decision?

a swimsuit for a holiday she is going on anyway seems like a very poor substitute - at least explain the house is too big for Santa and get her to suggest some smaller options.

GreyWednesday · 08/11/2023 07:02

I think you’ve had some unpleasant posts to be honest. I can understand why you’re trying to facilitate the holiday being ‘her’ present as that’s what she’s actually asked for! Some posters are acting like this was your idea and you’re trying to rob her of a Christmas present…
I think the idea of a new swimming costume/towel/beach bag is quite a nice idea, maybe matching ones with a character she likes on, and with a special letter from Santa? I don’t see the issue with those being her present from Santa, as long as she gets plenty of things to play with as she is only little. Maybe you could get a little cuddly toy to put in there too?

Whinge · 08/11/2023 07:11

I much rather her have memories

If you care about making memories then buy the dream house. She will have fantastic memories of the Christmas she got the one gift she wanted, and the many years she spent playing with it. I also find it incredibly sad that you're refusing to buy the one thing she wants because it is too big and bulky and unnecessary clutter for the home Sad

JustACountryMusicGirlInCowboyBoots · 08/11/2023 07:16

Buy her the dream house if you can afford it. You've said it's not the money but space but I've found we always find space for things that are really wanted. It sounds like it's the only actual present she's asked for so if you can afford it then buy it for her. At 5 it's all about what they can play with not a present they can't have for months and that e dry or else is also having.

Cosycover · 08/11/2023 07:16

She wants the dream house. Its so selfish not to get her that because its big.

I got my sindy house aged 5 and it's my all time favourite Christmas memory.

Dream house doesn't equal furby.